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Birth Date: 2000-07-12
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Date: October 16, 2022
What you heard was through the grapevine. The issue with that is a grapevine has many branches and things that are said get twisted and turned. She may have said you were nice and cute, but she wanted more. Not necessarily from you.
Give her time. If you have a date planned, talk to her about it. If no date is planned, leave her be. You don't need to “put your foot down”.
You and your husband have a huge and basic incompatibility and there is no way to compromise on this issue: he wants kids (now) and you don’t want them (ever).
I’m sorry but you two need to divorce and find people who want the same things that the other person wants.
If you have a baby because he wants you to do it, you will resent him AND THE BABY. This isn’t fair to either of you.
You also sound like you have some prior experience with eating disorders. Your hyper focus on weight and revulsion at the idea that you will gain weight speaks volumes.
You will gain weight while pregnant. It can take a while to lose it. Your mental health will suffer.
Please don’t think about it in terms of being selfish not to give him what he wants. Think of it in terms of the two of you wanting opposite things that no one should ever give in on. You’re not selfish, you’re being true to yourself.
Hopefully he can see this and understand. But even if he doesn’t, you two need to end your marriage before you make a huge mistake that will eventually split the two of you up anyway. Because I guarantee you that your marriage won’t last if you have kids you don’t actually want.