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Date: September 27, 2022
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This. Right here. This.
He is not the loving partner he tries to reassure you he is. Loving partners do not Jekel/Hyde you.
If he wants to leave – good riddance. Get a lawyer, get some advice about what to do about the house, and how to split the equity. Then get him out of your life.
Get yourself some councilling. Do not- Repat do not get couple therapy with him. He is abusive and acting nuts. You're going to have to figure this out for yourself – because he is NOT reliable, and he is the problem.
Don't be a fool.
Sounds like a keeper
DON'T STICK UR DICK IN CRAZY. The girl is a walking red flag man, you are thinking with the wrong head
Not your house, not your rules. If they don't want a dog in the house? You respect it or move out.
Sounds like she didn't even give you the option. She was just looking for a reason.
I had some complicated advice until
Iâve also gone through his phone and saw that he is hiding Snapchats from other girls. It plants a seed in my head that heâs hiding a lot more.
This relationship is just flat-out doomed. Break up now or break up later.
her opinion is just to forget about it?!?!?!
either one or both of those motherfuckers should be running for their lives and if they're not fessing up 100% of the evidence they're complicit and should start packing their bags if you ask me.
Take the win and wave him 'bhu-bye'. Talk about disrespect – what a jerk he is.
“facts over feelings” said unironically is such a red flag honestly.
My wife and I follow Vietnamese and Nigerian traditions, we have no interest in American or English ones.
I don't think it sounds like she enjoys the Vietnamese tradition of your mum criticising her while she was pregnant. Also I didn't criticise your mum helping, I criticised the fact you don't stick up for your wife.
Info:
Out of curiosity is your hands off approach part of tradition or is that just you as a person?
Are you aware that it's normal in the UK to rest for up to 9 months after birth. That isn't a tradition, it's a quality of life thing.
Is it acceptable for your mother to criticise and belittle your wife in your culture?
Yeah, you don't sound like a cracking husband tbh and whether it be culture or citizenship differences, that likely created different life expectations. You're refusing to see that youve played a part towards the issue you and your wife are having and I feel bad for her.
My sons father completely understood that sex was out of the question for me after I had our child. Until I was ready. He was super supportive and we had a little joke that it might not happen until Julaugust 37th. Because that makes no sense and I couldnât give him a time frame of when. He was so patient. It took me a while. I just didnât feel right down there yet. But it did come back so donât worry. What I would be worried about is your PPD. Doesnât mean you are sadâŚlike me I was frustrated a lot. He needs to support you in all of those things. Your body just did some amazing shit and if he canât see that, itâs truly unfortunate. Congratulations knew mama. I know youâve got this. Im glad you have your brother who helps you! Lean to him if needed. Would having a family meeting with more than just your husband work? Have your brother there? Maybe mom and dad too? Maybe his parents as well? That way yâall are all on the same page! Try and have a conversation with your husband. I only had one child for a reasonâŚ. Please know how amazing you are and know that you are not alone in your feelings or physical. Our bodies are so amazing and you just grew a whole human inside yours!
Yeah reading week is like a week to catchup on studies before exams.
Ok cool ill wait a few days and then send that.
I think you both miss who I married. This person isnât random. Regardless of sex and penetration and other people, this is my soulmate.
Run. Youâll never be good enough for your future MIL
Well damn, that was a rollercoaster. I think honesty is the best policy, and something tells me youâre going to be just fine. You still have A-V!
I am so sorry for your loss, take all the time you need to grieve, cry, write her letters, talk to her pictures, once you are ready see a grief counsellor, they will help you address your feelings and work through them.
Red flags. Iâd be looking at their messages. This sounds like a meet up to hook up. Either you go or he doesnât go.
I dealt with childhood trauma. My childhood was not good. That said, for a while, I was extremely codependent. It was a survival tactic.
I went to counseling and Alanon. It made a world of distance.
This isn't your fault.
Did you make copies of the messages before she deletes them all? You will need proof later on.
Thank you so much for all of this. I usually would put my needs on the back burner for the sake of compromise, but I think youâre right in that I ought not to do that for such a small reason.
I talked to him again to see what might be going on, and I found out that he hadnât even looked into the house. I asked him on Friday to check it out so that I could talk with the landlord on Monday to see about moving forward, which is why I brought it up again today, but he didnât do it.
He claimed it was â30 minutes awayâ from his job, but itâs actually closer than our current place (12 minutes vs 15). Then he started asking about the age of appliances (they were in pictures I sent him), and the location (heâs been to my campus before- itâs a good area). And complaining about the price-to-benefit ratio⌠I was like, you donât even have to pay anything extra?? Like why should that be a consideration for you? So basically just trying to come up with other reasons to dislike it, but not having any.
Why do you have to keep extending your hand out to him, placating him? How about for once, he tried pleasing you instead?
((Hugs)). This sucks. Itâs okay to grieve now and later. Your wife isnât the only one effected by this horrible situation. Just remember to honor her by staying strong for her and your children. Life isnât fair and unfortunately sometimes itâs soul crushingly hot. Iâm praying for you and your family.