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Room for online sex video chat creamy_nemo
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Birth Date: 1999-03-17
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Ethnicity: ethnicityIndian
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Date: November 2, 2022
How old are you and your best friend OP?
yeah okay. thank you so much!
I understand your sentiment, but your partner does not want to go to therapy, regardless of whether you think he needs or not.
This is why I am trying to establish that behavior. Behavior is concrete evidence that can be presented to him.
The reason I asked is that I was imagining the conversation as follows:
You: Hey, I have been thinking a lot about what you shared with me the other day. Have you considered going to therapy to share this with someone?
Partner: Why do you think therapy will help me? What am I doing wrong?
You: … (something along the lines of is not about what he is doing?)…
Partner: As I mentioned to you before, I do not think therapy will help me, > because there is nothing to help – I have moved past that.
You: But you have not moved. [citation needed]
By identifying:
abnormal behavior that this behavior may be explained by that child trauma
you are establishing evidence that he has not moved past this. If you can't establish that, then at this point in time he has a point and the assumption that he needs therapy is challenged. If there is evidence, then the next step is to present it to him and ask: a) do you think you have this behavior? b) why do you have it? (i.e. no leading questions)
Regardless of the outcome, imo this exercise of monitoring and presenting these is the most effective way to help your partner. He is likely irrationally trying to avoid establishing the two aspects above. As someone that he trusts and cares about him, you are in an ideal position to “fill that irrational gap”.
With that said, I would urge you to not do this exercise with a conclusion already established – the goal is not trying to find stuff that justifies the conclusion that he needs therapy; the goal is to observe his behavior and establish concrete evidence on his behalf, and let him establish that there may be a causal relationship.
I think you can still go into the military and have your daughter, you may have to leave her with your parents during basic training but after you can have her with you, they have daycare in the military.
I think I'd be extricate myself from financial liability for Nick Canon and his barrage of babies.
When I say “probably” I mean “probably”.
Birth control fails, what makes you so sure they didn’t use it? You’re not that smart please stop pretending like you have any idea what happened. Also, the decision to not use birth control is made by two people (unless your omniscient ass is about to tell me it wasn’t consensual ??), and so your logic break downs given that she made the same decision and wasn’t cheating (unless she was cheating, go ahead tell me ???)
Yes, shoot your shot over text or Snapchat. “Hey, I need to be honest with you. I’m into you. Would you like to go out on a date sometime?” Good luck.
This really depends how bad they were before and how much damage you did. If your scratch looks like his scratches and you just added an extra one, then it’s not a big deal. It might even be the kind of thing you just don’t say anything because his boss might be an asshole and demand all new rims even though they were already messed up. If your scratch it like 10 times worse than all the others and is super obvious, then you tell the boss and let insurance pay it out. Either way at worst, it’s just an inconvenience. This is what insurance is for.
I think that’s a great idea, I’d like to talk to her about her medication. I haven’t gotten as far as telling her that our relationship is on the line, but I’m definitely going to talk with her about switching things up
CPS has visited several times although I've never been the one to call. Once they find out my parents are well off financially they assume that the kids are being taken care off 😐
It’s only been four months, you need to dump this man. Red flags galore over here
If its a deal breaker then break up with her. Forcing people to adhere to your rules when they dont actually want to wont work. She doesnt want to. You dont want to look at other compromises and options. You've made it clear in the comments that you're not budging, so just break up.
What is drastic? Crying? More?
You've been groomed. Disgusting old man…. Please find another job and someone your age. He is a pedo.
This is why I don’t ask what my partner watches. Frankly, as long as it’s not creepy or illegal… I “shouldn’t” care. I’m worried I will care and it might hurt me. So I don’t ask. It’s his business and his alone time. Shit, I watch gay porn… with both sexes and I’m not even bi. He thinks it’s weird, but hey. It gets me off.
She's since said to me that he saw three calls to the ex in her call history.
I feel like one.. I know better and I always end up looking stupid
All good, hoped you would receive it positively
This is a horrible idea. If you have different values around sex now, then you need to acknowledge that now. Even if you get married you’ll still have different values.
?
There’s two things here, and while the second is general advice, it ties into the first.
So first, we have to point out the age gap here. I get it; you’re consenting adults. But age gaps like this become a problem when the two parties are likely to be in different life stages. Like anything else, context is everything so certainly correct me if I’m wrong, but generally speaking a 26 year old and a 20 year old aren’t in the same life stage. A 20 year old will usually be in college and a year or two from graduating. A 26 year old will usually be a few years into a career. Those just don’t often align.
It’s especially important here because what you keep calling “overthinking” is insecurities. No one’s going to be surprised that a 20 year old as immature and insecure. That brings me to the second point.
Insecurity is a relationship killer. In saying that, no amount of reassurance will ever be enough. You’ve learned that. So that’s the real advice here. As you get to know people, if you learn they’re insecure and need constant reassurance while also refusing to acknowledge that only they can address their insecurities, you walk away and don’t fight it. Don’t settle for someone who isn’t secure in themselves. Good luck.
All I can say is that I am utterly confused by people that make the decision you made. If you really love her, it just looks like you need a lot of therapy to work through shit. So do that. Figure out what's behind this decision so you can work on yourself.
Can you please not say things like this around a bunch of sad sacks like us? ?? that is beautiful and I’m so bitter about it haha
This is literally the definition of gaslighting. He continues to do something you've repeatedly told him for years that bothers you, says he didn't really do it, then days he was just playing and that he didn't know you don't like it, and blaming you 100% for being in the wrong with your reaction. This is the ultimate form of manipulation.
She should be made march out of town in front of the whole community while they shout SHAME at her.
There's a little snippet of this that makes me think something a bit bigger is going on – “it's the fact I always had to initiate sex and intimacy with him, tried to understand when he said he was too anxious or depressed'
Do you get the emotional support and love you need from this person in general?
Right? If my partner isn’t enthusiastic then I’m stopping to make sure. If there’s even a hint that he doesn’t want to continue then we are not continuing. I can’t imagine wanting a partner to only want to have sex if I want to. Also he must be so sad dude. Imagine never seeing your partner all in the moment? That’s the hottest shit ever. Dude needs help.
Let’s be honest. No one just comes clean without someone throwing proof in their face. The lying sucks but it kind of feels like you’re focusing on that because it’s slightly less bad than the fact she has been having an emotional affair.
And FWIW, I (44F), am the type that would be able to forgive a one night stand far more easily than an ongoing emotional or physical affair. But it doesn’t mean I’d like to be in your shoes.
I think you guys have needed couples counseling for some time and individual therapy for each of you wouldn’t hurt either. Separating and getting back together and what not isn’t going to fix this.
It seems like your wife has some FOMO/has missed out on her 20’s and is feeling pretty torn about things. Not sure how you’re feeling. But it may be this relationship just isn’t going to work.
Regardless, part of our job as parents is to demonstrate healthy relationships for our kids to model. Even if you two aren’t fighting in front of the kids or they don’t understand the words, they pick up on tension. And that can make them more prone to anxiety disorders and other mental health issues and lead them to thinking what they’re seeing IS a healthy relationship when it’s not. So staying together for the kids isn’t so great for the kids.
Just tell him “you should never make fun of people who pronounce words wrong. If they do, it's because they learnt the word while reading”.
Your husband is a liar and a cheater and not a good person. It was silly of you to marry him considering he never changed his views on what he did as being cheating / wrong.
Who are you to tell someone how to feel?
He's a useless mouth breather, next!
Mett your friends, revive old hobbies, find new ones. You boyfriend is not your entertainer. He's your partner. Someone that is a “nice to have” rather than a “must have”.
It was a scam not something she did deliberately. If she has the ability to learn from her experiences she will probably learn from this one. She was scammed, fired, being pressured to repay this money. She needs a compassionate, loving & supportive partner – if that's not you maybe you should let her move on to someone better.
wrap it up, b.
Both sides of the story exist here. For some it’s great, for others it’s awful. My experience was awful. My ex wife cheated and lied to me about it for years.
Call the police. You are currently disabled, they will take this seriously. Say you need them to send a social worker!
You want advice, how about do your job and date married clients?
She sounds insecure and really likes you, have you tried talking with her about it?
Ehhh don’t try to make this situation sound normal.
I dated a girl when i was 19 who stopped taking birth control aswell. She told me alot about the side effects and its influence on her body, because of birth control her cycle was completely ruined and she got her period every 2 weeks.
Since i heared that story of her, i would never ask a partner why she doent take birth control. In the end under today's requirements for medication it wouldn't be allowed to be used anyway.
How you protect yourself during sex is a personal decision. So demanding or asking you to take birth control is just disrespectful.
A small sidenote. You people seem to forget that protection isnt just about birth control, but also about reducing the risk of catching an STD. I mean there's a reason why there's antibiotics resistant Chlamydia is going around
You should stop fucking other people. Unprotected sex, really? Are you stupid?
He's a loser. In 5 years you'll be laughing about the dude so wrapped up in his own ego that he showed you another girls nudes to prove a point. Who does that? Only a weirdo ?
One user u/elmuchocapitano wrote beautifully:
“I expect a detailed and thoughtful apology, and to see nothing but compassionate, non-sexual care and attention until I am well. If you ever speak to me like that again, I will leave you.”
And I fully agree, this is what you could tell him, and then forget him and take care of yourself, your recovery as much as possible.
Well, you’re kind of young so unless you want them by the time you’re 22 or something I would take it one day at a time. I also wouldn’t be hanging out there for 10 years waiting for him to change his mind. One day at a time probably he won’t be your boyfriend in two years. If he is, then you might rethink wanting to get serious with him.
Lol, you sure can pick them
As a wife, I wholeheartedly agree with this comment.
A transwoman existing and dating a guy for two weeks while not discussing her past isn’t deceit. How often do ciswomen discuss their deep secrets within the first two weeks of dating someone? The only reason this is judged as deceit is because y’all are terrified that you’d be attracted to and have sex with us.
The right time for a trans person to discuss this is prior to sex (if pre-op) or before the relationship becomes serious (if post op). This woman did absolutely nothing wrong besides having an emotional reaction to such an ignorant response.
Thanks for your advice I appreciate it a lot. And for that, I will elaborate a little more on how I became friends with him. He works with my mom and he needed help renovating his house so I offered since I had some experience in remodeling. And through that, I saw we had a lot in common and then the more I got to know him we had a lot more in common than just personal interests and hobbies. And now you could say he and I have more of a brother relationship.
You sound like a nice guy but your profile determines that is a lie. Maybe delete your history before you go posting some shit like this. Looks like the pot calling the kettle black imo.