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Emily Hill – Links: https://allmylinks.com/emilyhill, 24 y.o.
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Live! Live Sex Chat rooms Emily Hill – Links: https://allmylinks.com/emilyhill
Date: October 1, 2022
imo you probably shouldn't be thinking about getting married to someone you've been with for less than a year. and yeah, especially since you haven't met his kids. have you seen pics of them or spoke to them at all?
I'd personally say you have a valid reason to be upset here.
That he did not tell you he never told you about the girl and him being friends is weird to me, because of the nature of how they met. I think it would've been expected for him to tell you about that, just to let you know. But that's beside the current situation.
The part about him finding her attractive is hard to make any real conclusions about. The fact that he told you both in a way is a good thing I guess, because he's being honest. However, as a guy I think you can be attracted to people other than the person you're dating and you should not tell them about this. We all can think that others objectively are attractive, but telling your partner about them wouldn't do much except make them feel insecure, especially if it's about a friend or other person that you see regularly.
I think you should voice your concerns, and tell him that the whole situation has made you insecure etc. I'd tell him that I appreciate the honesty, but that him saying that he finds her attractive has made you worried about the friendship, even though he's said that he doesn't want anything more with her. If he responds in an understading way, and you guys can talk things through than that's great. Remember, you might be a jealous person, but he can also help your relationship by taking that into account and being understanding and careful about these kinds of situations.
I am not going to give you any hate, but I would urge you to seek therapy. You seem to have a good thing going and you are about to fuck it up because of your insecurities. I would think about this rationally: you finally have something you always wanted: someone who loves you for who you are and doesn't look down on you and reject you. She's accepting you with all your flaws and insecurities. You owe her to at least work on yourself to be able to do the same for her. 8 partners at 24 is nothing outrageous. If you don't figure this out, you are right, you will remain lonely, because the odds of finding someone with little sexual experience decreases tremendously as you get older and you have to find a way to accept that people have a past. There is nothing wrong with not wanting a partner who slept with dozens of people and exposed themselves to the risk of STDs etc. That's a preference thing. Some people like promiscuity, some don't. But your girlfriend had a pretty reasonable amount of sexual partners before you and if you don't want to be lonely you have to learn to accept that people have a past before you.
I’m wondering since he begged you to remain friends I wonder if it’s his wife that’s making him end the friendship because of their religious belief because it doesn’t make sense for him to say that but then turn around and beg for the friendship to not end I wonder if he was saying he wanted to end the friendship to please his wife ?
Marry each other, problem solved??
I suggest you both read: Not Just Friends by Dr Shirley Glass.
It's based on research of couples that experienced infidelity. Good people not looking to cheat, not physically attracted, and thinking they were “just friends “.
Lessons learned about how to manage friendships so they don't threaten your marriage.
No, honestly we both grew up in abusive families. I've cut off most of the toxic family, and starting out it wasn't this way with him either. Now that I think about it this all started about a year ago. For the life of me I can't think of anything that changed to trigger it.
When I play pool with someone new, I just play as I play. BUT! I also am never against helping someone improve their game. I'm better than most, not as good as some, and I enjoy the game. I'm constantly trying to be better at it and I like making others better too.
It just drives me nuts. I know he WAS my dad, have you tried telling HIM that?
How else can you support him though? I mean realistically. He’s been to therapy, to more then one therapist. He’s been to SAA meetings, he’s been in multiple different scenarios that you consider cheating and is obviously still lying/has lied. He feels bad because he’s been caught again. I can’t say if he has an addiction or not, I’m not him or his licensed therapist but what I do know is that there’s been multiple attempts to get help over the span of multiple years and he still has lied and put himself in these situations. The only one who can decide when enough is enough is you, and you need to make the right choices for your kids and yourself or they’ll learn by example.
She does need more evidence and as creepy and vulgar as this is the hidden camera is her best bet. If this is one of the likely suspects there is a very big chance that he has and/or will victimize others. It is very shitty that this fell on her but she could save other victims and get herself some justice with that camera.
Good for you. Just be honest. I’ve enjoy your company. I’ve realized that if I’m going to date it needs to be closer to home. I wish you health and happiness.
I see where you’re uncomfortable- like if you go…that’s far out. and you’ll most likely have to stay and what’s gonna happen next?
An assumed threesome?
This is giving what happened to me recently with my last FWB. He was supposed to come over and he sent me a snap of a guy he was with at a bar and said “so this is my friend. we’re gonna come play with you tonight.”
like one I don’t know him. two you had plans with me. three you never asked me if I’m okay with a MMF or MFM threesome?? totally disrespectful and made me feel like I just meant nothing. like yes we’re just having sex but wow you just have no consideration for my feelings and boundaries as a human being at this point. I told him that sounded fun but he went about it the wrong way given we had never had a discussion. He then said that was the discussion. I demanded respect and he began to respect me after I shut that sh*t down.
Good news is- your guy is telling you before so you can actually contemplate what you want to do and what you’re comfortable with doing…if you want to go to this party and be ready to socialize maybe even outside of him and/or with him and this other guy….etc.
maybe he’s not insinuating a threesome here but it’s really hit or miss. You could hit it off with him at the party and he might not pay the other guy much attention. Or he pays you both attention and you all hit it off. Or you end up making friends and still hit it off with your guy and/or the guy he also invited. or you end up feeling stranded and forced to talk to people to not feel awkward…worst case scenario you literally end up sitting in a corner watching your guy flirt up a storm and then having to approach and make yourself known as the side piece.
Idk- it could be a really fun night or it could be awkward and tiresome.
(28F)
We co-steward it. Protocols are different here.
I am trying,it is not that easy.
After 7 years sis it ain't gonna happen.
Don't bother. Either he grows up or he doesnt..
If she's got form for this, you need to be the one to step away. Don't think about a future where she could possibly be in it. With games like this, you're setting yourself up for years of torment. Rip off the band aid. Just stop responding, stop interacting, don't give her the attention she's craving. Shut it down. Not from blocking, but from casual indifference.
I wouldn’t make any demands about the porn at all. Makes it wayyyy too easy for him to tell or promise you what you want to hear, quietly dismiss you as just insecure and controlling, and change nothing. Leaving you with the treat of spending the next 6 months wondering why nothing is improving, grilling him about his continued porn use, him lying, and ultimately saying shit like “I dunno what the deal is, maybe it’s (thing that makes it your fault)”
Don’t do that. Just be honest…”Hey look, I’d love to have great sex with toy, but it just isn’t very good. In fact it’s pretty disappointing, bc it’s clear you’re not into it. So maybe see a doctor, or whatever it is you need to do, but I’m not interested in any more of…whatever this has been. Not until you sort out whatever it is and can actually be into it.”
And then give him a couple weeks (bc the relationship is only a couple months in) to get his game in gear, otherwise take it as your cue to wheels-up on this one. Seriously.
Maybe you'll get to help pick out a name for the child when some random guy gets her pregnant.
Just tell her you’re actually 20 but aged yourself up because you didn’t want her to think you were some loser that can’t buy bud light
I mean… are people saying this?
As a fat woman, I know I’m fat and I’ll call myself fat. But I can’t imagine in what context someone would bring this up me or my bf?
Add to what everyone is saying below where she said the reason she withheld this info was BECAUSE of his obsession with taking her virginity. Personally I think she should have taken this as a red flag and dumped him a long time ago, but in your early 20's it's hard to see or put red flags over what you think is love.
Username checks out.