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i’ll be your whore today and i will make u cum a lot , ♥ squirt show @ goal / no limits on pvt / check my new videos [69 tokens remaining]
Date: November 6, 2022
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I can tell you that I was your daughter in this situation and I spent decades be verbally and emotionally (and very rarely physically) abused by my father’s wife. She started out loving and sweet and getting us holiday gifts and was oh so nice…but she never got past the fact that I was a constant reminder of my mom and treated me horribly behind closed doors and manipulated my father into thinking she was the victim being forced to raise his kids when she only wanted to raise her own kids. We had a “blended” family where her children did no wrong and my brother and I were the bane of her existence.
You are choosing a life partner but you are also choosing a person who is going to shape and define your daughter’s childhood. Do you want your daughter growing up thinking that she is the problem? that she is second best? That she is the reason step mom isn’t happy? Because I can tell you it’s really naked to work through processing it all as an adult and it will impact your relationship with your children as well.
Someone funded that bus trip to make him your problem. Your parents? Their church? Uncle? It doesn’t matter, he is not your problem or responsibility. You didn’t choose to take responsibility for him. You are not his parent. The fact that your parents have a restraining order against him says everything you need to know. Print out a list of homeless shelters or offer a bus ticket back home.
The comment on bonding over Jesus is just….weird.
You can't force her and the fact you even want help to push and pressure her into a situation she doesn't want to be in is disgusting.
Woah. Ok. So I’m not a mother, but if you remove that element I’ve lived what you’re describing in her just a few years ago. I’m very sorry for the length, but your scenario strikes an uncomfortably intimate chord in me and for your sake I’d love try and give any account even close to what she might be going through.
I had several years of instability and warning signs that ultimately resulted in a legally and physically dangerous psychotic break. Crazy long story short: My poor mental health, strong genetic predisposition to ADHD & Bipolar I, and the unprecedented multi-faceted stressors in my life at that time collided and my mind imploded along with my sense of self and previously firm grasp on reality. I was behaving damn near exactly like she is but it seems to have been going on significantly longer for her which is terrifying.
When she smokes, I’m guessing it’s weed? Even if it’s cigarettes. Look into research on the theorized predisposition of the ADHD brain to substance abuse. It can definitely start from something that was never a problem before. I went from weed to alcohol +misc. and back and forth a million times until I was properly addicted for years to dangerous, life-altering/threatening levels and it took a very expensive addiction program and my father’s death from substance abuse to get me to finally stop and begin repairing my life. It’s both chemical and mental. Just as clinical as it is emotional. I can’t speak for everyone but I don’t think my stimulants worked how they were supposed to when I was virtually never sober, even though they always helped. I was barred from using stimulants indefinitely for a few years due to my use and I’m glad it happened; as much as it filled me with daily desperation at the time ‘cause I really did need them. I’m back on them now after years of naked work to prove to doctors and therapists that I was healthy enough for it – it’s so much less chaotic and more productive when you’re genuinely stable and have a holistic approach to your personal progress.
As for the psychosis symptoms. Absolutely what others have said: this is way above everyone’s pay grade. Any first year, first semester psych student could immediately recognize serious symptoms in the bipolar/psychosis/schizophrenia family from what you’ve written. Out-of-character aggression when others lovingly tried to help or be rational was the point where no one around me could deny I wasn’t in control anymore, but I was already too far gone to let even trusted doctors convince me how sick I was. I know it’s nude, but you can’t blame yourself or try to fix it. Surrender both of yourselves to highly trained professionals that you trust and connect with and let go of any notions of what the correct outcome is here. The only outcome that matters is that you both get well and your child stays safe, no matter how unrecognizable life is from here on out.
I would absolutely listen to those mentioning possible postpartum psychosis more seriously versus my account since motherhood is obviously some kind of catalyst here. Bare minimum it’s a layer of her existence she can’t escape that carries undeniable potential to be a permanent, dynamic stressor. Just wanted to communicate that this could’ve been inevitable for her, baby or no baby, depending on her family history and you should try to find comfort in the fact that no single factor was ever to blame. Sadly, this probably won’t play out without some serious interventions from family or providers and I’m sorry you’ll be dealing with all that. But she isn’t safe – there’s no path out that will completely avoid these hurdles.
My biggest takeaway from my experiences was that your mental health providers are the most important professional relationships in your life. They’re not your friend, but you have to feel safe and completely open with them and they have listen carefully and respect what you tell them is or isn’t working while still being the person in the room who 100% will and should always know the medical side better than you. If she’s uncomfortable for the tiniest reason and it’s causing her to hold back information or push through the discomfort as a challenge to herself: leave. If it works for a while then it doesn’t: leave. There will always be amazing and shitty providers. They’re highly trained, but they’re still just people. Fit matters so much and should be prioritized above all.
Many statements made by my psychiatrists have changed my life, but the one that’s gotten me to today is: “If there’s a medication with a side effect bad enough to mess with your quality of life, it’s not the right medication for you.” Or not the right dose. Or not the right combination of medications and doses. I always thought medications were about making trade offs you could stomach. Almost 4 years and countless medication and lifestyle adjustments later I’m the healthiest I’ve ever been. On multiple ADHD + Bipolar medications (some at a high dose) with no side effects whatsoever. The contrast to how bad off I was is frightening. I honestly didn’t think my life today was possible from how dark everything was through months, then years of shame and humiliation over the things I’d done settling in + the fight to trust when I wasn’t paranoid or hallucinating, etc. But I promise you it’s possible for your wife to move on from this one day. Though it’ll probably take everything she’s got. I wish you so, so much luck as parents and as two individuals who have shared love and life before all this.
You treated your son like he was completely incapable of doing anything on his own and you don't understand why your children blame you for his suicide?
It'll never happen. Fyi. Hope you don't mind it.
It sounds like even if she is sincere about still wanting to be in a relationship, your emotional needs in the relationship aren't being met regardless.
I would agree with other users in that you should communicate with her a little about this distance between you, but also keep in mind that if you feel she's losing interest, you don't need to wait around for her to break up with you. You can express your emotional needs, and if she isn't able to meet them, it isn't really a good relationship for you anyway, regardless of how committed she is.
She wants me to buy her expensive things, for example, a sports jersey that was on sale. When Fran found out, she said she was hoping there’s no way I was actually buying it for Greta, I said yes. I decided not to after seeing how mad Fran got. There have been times where she would ask me to get UberEats for her and I would say no. I also shared my family Netflix account with her, and when Fran found out she was VERY MAD. Whenever she (Greta) has dumb requests, I always say no now.
To answer the question about why I shared the location with her, she basically said “let’s share locations” and I responded with ok.
And Greta didn’t talk about Fran until now and because I thought the location thing was dumb too because Fran felt sharing your location with others was for significant others and family members only, I didn’t see the problem with the location because it’s not like she’s going to come find me. Plus she shares her location with others. However, I find it suspicious that she had such a big reaction to Fran’s boundary.
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I’ll come on-line with you.
Don’t do that to the baby. Their ears are delicate and they can’t tell you of it hurts.
As for the rest of it, you are both AH.
But is that gonna fix things with your wife? Is posting here gonna fix things?
Being “right” isn’t going to repair things
Rando shows up, keep the door locked if he doesn't leave call the cops.
If she have a problem with her husband she would go ask her friends for advice … my point as long as they both don’t cross the boundaries of both being committed in a relationship.
Well, do you WANT to be with someone so afraid of upsetting you that he won’t tell you the naked truths?
Your mom needs to be seen by a doctor. These violent mood swings sound to be much more than just “loud yelling”.
Do not see her again until she has been seen by a doctor and is in some kind of treatment/recovery program.
She might be a baiting you. You said she was a master manipulator but she’s also a master at baiting you.
Yes that last paragraph was too good an opportunity to pass up. But the first part was legit
Good luck OP.
He’s made his bed.
I'm pretty familiar with saving money for trips, as a fellow poor, and still manage to hit therapy once a week. It's like magic or something.
Thank you for your comment. As much as a part of me wants to send it, another part just isn't sure and the other comments on this thread are making me hesitate what the right decision in this situation would be
This situation is more than just “awkward” and if you're even allowed to keep your job it's probably because your employer feels sorry for you. You just don't kiss and tell. You've humiliated yourself and your girlfriend and proved that you can't handle the demands of professionalism. TBH there's probably nothing you can do to make this right.
Your feelings are yours alone and totally valid. That being said, if you don’t want to be upset you may want to dig deeper into why you have those feelings. What are you telling you about yourself when he did or didn’t do whatever upset you? Those feelings have nothing to do with him or his actions. They are all about you.
I like a lil bit of stank.
A naked day of work is not 'little' though.
I 100% thinks he still has feelings. I feel he’s putting her up on a pedestal and hyper romanticizing their marriage. They divorced because she left him for another man.
Somethings don't need explaining. You know exactly why he has the app OP…
Everyone is just (rightly) outraged at this gross pedo dude and that’s why you’re getting downvoted, I think. But I absolutely agree with you about the algorithm taking creative liberties to try to tell you what you should like based on things you also like. Def not the case here, OP’s husband is cultivating this crap but I get what you were saying.
My friend… Closure comes from within.
Its the acceptance of knowing you need to move on and delete this person from your mind, permanently.
Knowing specifics, wont resolve anything. This mental battle you're going through, will be the exact same mental battle 6 months from now.
Why?
Learning why it didn't work out, wouldn't change the fact it didn't work out.
Knowing that it didn't work out, regardless of reason… is all you need to know. That is the only piece of information you need to have healthy closure. The rest of it, comes from you stepping up and getting over this battle yourself.
omg yay im so happy for all of you ?
Your husband needs to work on his personal boundaries.
It does sound like you are emotionally cheating without really realising the extent of what you are done. You are actively hiding your relationship with your colleague and lying to her. I can understand the ultimatum. Is this friendship really worth the loss of your relationship?
I can also say for your wife to give you such an ultimatum, she will have discussed the problem with you many times over and given you plenty of chances.
It’s likely you have already eroded the trust in your relationship, hence the ultimatum.
That's not the point. The point is that OP is insinuating that a man won't make advances on a woman unless she's signaling that she wants it, which is not a great assumption to make. It likely doesn't apply to this specific situation, but the idea that a woman has to be doing something to make a man try to kiss her or otherwise is a dangerous mindset.
Her answers are not different in every comment. I've read them all, and they're extremely consistent. Reading comprehension is important.
My best guess is that they fell out after your fiance found out your best friend is in love with you. Your fiancé's made a gentleman's agreement to not to expose that fact.
Its like the “My overkill” episode of scrubs