you're a teenager. he's damn near 30. you moved your entire life to a different state for this guy, and he cheats on you.
he is with you because you're an easy target and don't know any better. you're young. don't get roped into his little charade more than you already have. leave his unfaithful ass, and go home.
Does she have a car, or somebody in the household who can take her? If so, no, this is frankly ridiculous. I can’t tell if she’s expecting you to do it and you don’t want to or you want to and she doesn’t expect you to but either way-absolutely but.
The only way it makes sense is temporarily, if she’s working out a way to get her own transport.
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Honestly I’d give her the ultimatum. Me or the bestfriend. I’m a female and if the roles were reversed that’s exactly what I’d tell my boyfriend. Your bestfriend or me because I don’t want you bff in my life. If my partner chose their friend then custody of the child will be split 50/50 and I’d get a restraining order against the bff.
You don't feel comfortable pulling her aside when she is sober and advising her that she gets this sort of way when she drinks?
Maybe cut down on the activities that involve alcohol consumption as well. If she has a problem, which she does, you may have to alter what you all do to entertain yourselves.
Sorry but she’s lying. No woman thinks Plan B is for cramps. Plus she spent the entire weekend trying to find a way to go and buy it and never mentioned she had cramps.
Stripp is not the only form of dancing, so you could have every other class of dancing. Tango, hip-hop, belly dancing etc etc. Also you don't have to be a dancer to see the world but you can work in many jobs that need you to travel. One Google research and you have a whole list!!!! So that you chose to be a stripper is a little concerning. Many are going to tell you that it is not, that it is a job, that nothing is wrong with it but no one is going to be honest with you of how many times they regretted doing it. They don't want to speak the truth because then they will have to admit to themselves that they were wrong!!! Being a stripper is lonely, you forget about being lonely because you focus on the “job” but that doesn't make you happy, also sometimes you feel disgusted especially when a client is not respectful and you wonder why you are there in the first place but it is too late to quit because you have already lost important time and also the money sweetens all that bs!!! Not to talk about how coworkers in a future job are “seeing” you and that you have to work double to earn their respect. And they have a right not respecting you because of the lack of morals from your side. Especially when you saw a hottie and you did more than the job requirements. As about your ex bf. You have to let him go. There is nothing that can save it now. He saw the way how you tend to romanticise situations while you have no idea how the reality is!!! That showed him that he can't trust your judgement and that sometimes you can't think clearly because you put on the lovely dovey goggles!!! Let him go. It is too late.
Who she fucks is none of your business, no matter what the two of you said at breakup. Her harassing your current girlfriend is definitely your business, though. But it is up to your girlfriend how she wants to handle it.
How bad is the harassment? Is it just a few nasty texts, or has she moved it to the physical world? If she is doing anything threatening, or breaking things, you should consider calling the cops. But if you think she's not going to do anything serious, best ignore.
Do you regret hooking up and marrying your son ex-best friend? You should. I would have tried to kill him. What are you hoping for in this meeting with your son?
I appreciate that. I guess I know a lot of what she’s going through outside of us and it can be difficult sometimes to have that menial talk, but I will definitely put in more effort. I’ve never been one to have the work drama talks, but I’m sure I can find something. This instance (and others) I just felt like I didn’t respond or initiate that fast enough which caused a spiral….and it was difficult to manage afterwards.
I think you’re lying to yourself as well as your wife. This is an emotional affair. You spend tons of time talking with and essentially dating another woman with your “museum trips” and lying to your wife about it.
Your friend should find a man of her own. You need to decide who is more important—your wife or your “friend.”
You say “lack of time due to kids” as a reason why your connection is weaker. So let me get this straight: your wife deals with the kids while you have fun talks and museum trips with another woman. And the other woman is just fine with this. She clearly has no regard for your wife.
Just stop it if you want to stay married. Tell your “friend” good bye.
Break up already. She just casually forgets to mention that this couple had been trying to involve her in a threesome. Let’s say she didn’t do anything ( which seems unlikely) she still willingly went into the situation knowing there were not pure intentions. That doesn’t look great either.
Reddit is not the place to get answers about this. It’s skewed against trans people and all the complexities being trans comes with.
He kept something from you and that’s not okay. But it’s a lot more complicated than that. You need to check in with yourself and read up on this from other people with trans partners.
You may be more open to this than you realize and have just been blindsided. Think about how much you care for him and what matters most. If that means splitting, that’s okay. But the answer doesn’t have to be break up. Strap ons exist, for starters. Bottom surgery is not a necessity.
You’re both very young. I hope you handle this with an open mind and open heart.
Marriage and kids yes but not for awhile. And yes he is i just dont know what to do about it cuz my bf loves her and doesnt want to change her and is kinda blinded to her poor behavior because of the love for his puppo
I'm sorry to say this but I really don't see how this is anything other than your husband being not only complicit but by the sound of it the instigator of your rape by his twin brother on multiple occasions.
This is not something you work through, this is something you report to the police and absolutely fuck up their entire fucking world for, he PIMPED you out to his brother!
If you aren't happy with your marriage, you don't have to talk yourself into staying unhappy. It's reasonable to want a relationship where you feel valued and appreciated and enjoyed. He may not be interested in offering that.
Thanks, i'll talk to her about it in the morning. hopefully there's something i can do to help her feel more satisfied with me. I appreciate your reply
There is no set frequency that is appropriate for any type of sexual activity for all people. You guys are currently mismatched, maybe you were before as well. Your partner is being terrible about it, pushing you to do something you don't want. There is no appropriate number of blow jobs to keep this being OK. Because every time you engage in sexual activity you don't want, it might keep him from being an ass for a few days but it is damaging to you and will build bitterness.
If you are mismatched with your libidos then that's how it is. You can use counseling to try and come to a compromise of activity that supports you both and your partner can get input on not being demeaning to you about his needs. If you lost your interest in sex over time- is it medical? is it a sign that your partner is an ass and/or you are depressed? Try to define that for yourself.
Bottom line is there isn't much benefit to determining how many blow jobs keeps your partner around if they also aren't working to better.
It’s not complicated. It’s only been a few months. She’s lied to you and has been talking to at least one guy you know of. No need for confrontation – just end it
Relationships usually don't end instantly for the person who initiates the end. Odds are for weeks/months before he “got up and left” he was already checking out of the relationship and was looking for a way out. For you who didn't see it coming it's instant pain and you're blindsided. For them it was coming for a while so they had all the time in the world to come to terms with what was going to happen.
Do yourself a favor and move on with 0 communication with him in any way. It's not healthy for you and your post confirms as much. Block him on everything and take the time to get in a good head space.
They’re doing an antibody test for herpes. Everything you said is correct. I know what I have to do but I am trying to find the strength to do it. I never planned for a back up plan because I never thought I would need one with him
you're a teenager. he's damn near 30. you moved your entire life to a different state for this guy, and he cheats on you.
he is with you because you're an easy target and don't know any better. you're young. don't get roped into his little charade more than you already have. leave his unfaithful ass, and go home.
Rarely attracted to anyone but I like the same sex sexually, like a buff dude without a face
Does she have a car, or somebody in the household who can take her? If so, no, this is frankly ridiculous. I can’t tell if she’s expecting you to do it and you don’t want to or you want to and she doesn’t expect you to but either way-absolutely but.
The only way it makes sense is temporarily, if she’s working out a way to get her own transport.
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I mean, feedback is important when cooking for others. You wouldn’t want someone to NOT enjoy what you made, right?
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Not seeing why you want to repair it. And I say that also while saying its good how you list his good qualities as well.
The dont eat till the car is clean is the one that would make me immediately walk out the door while leaving shit stained thongs in his car.
Honestly I’d give her the ultimatum. Me or the bestfriend. I’m a female and if the roles were reversed that’s exactly what I’d tell my boyfriend. Your bestfriend or me because I don’t want you bff in my life. If my partner chose their friend then custody of the child will be split 50/50 and I’d get a restraining order against the bff.
You don't feel comfortable pulling her aside when she is sober and advising her that she gets this sort of way when she drinks?
Maybe cut down on the activities that involve alcohol consumption as well. If she has a problem, which she does, you may have to alter what you all do to entertain yourselves.
He is a failure. Stop volunteering for this mistreatment. Get away from him.
She’s hit you twice now. She’s only going to escalate. Do not marry her or have a child with her.
She's 27 with 5 kids from 3 guys? Yeah I'd pump the brakes
Sorry but she’s lying. No woman thinks Plan B is for cramps. Plus she spent the entire weekend trying to find a way to go and buy it and never mentioned she had cramps.
Stripp is not the only form of dancing, so you could have every other class of dancing. Tango, hip-hop, belly dancing etc etc. Also you don't have to be a dancer to see the world but you can work in many jobs that need you to travel. One Google research and you have a whole list!!!! So that you chose to be a stripper is a little concerning. Many are going to tell you that it is not, that it is a job, that nothing is wrong with it but no one is going to be honest with you of how many times they regretted doing it. They don't want to speak the truth because then they will have to admit to themselves that they were wrong!!! Being a stripper is lonely, you forget about being lonely because you focus on the “job” but that doesn't make you happy, also sometimes you feel disgusted especially when a client is not respectful and you wonder why you are there in the first place but it is too late to quit because you have already lost important time and also the money sweetens all that bs!!! Not to talk about how coworkers in a future job are “seeing” you and that you have to work double to earn their respect. And they have a right not respecting you because of the lack of morals from your side. Especially when you saw a hottie and you did more than the job requirements. As about your ex bf. You have to let him go. There is nothing that can save it now. He saw the way how you tend to romanticise situations while you have no idea how the reality is!!! That showed him that he can't trust your judgement and that sometimes you can't think clearly because you put on the lovely dovey goggles!!! Let him go. It is too late.
Who she fucks is none of your business, no matter what the two of you said at breakup. Her harassing your current girlfriend is definitely your business, though. But it is up to your girlfriend how she wants to handle it.
How bad is the harassment? Is it just a few nasty texts, or has she moved it to the physical world? If she is doing anything threatening, or breaking things, you should consider calling the cops. But if you think she's not going to do anything serious, best ignore.
Do you regret hooking up and marrying your son ex-best friend? You should. I would have tried to kill him. What are you hoping for in this meeting with your son?
I appreciate that. I guess I know a lot of what she’s going through outside of us and it can be difficult sometimes to have that menial talk, but I will definitely put in more effort. I’ve never been one to have the work drama talks, but I’m sure I can find something. This instance (and others) I just felt like I didn’t respond or initiate that fast enough which caused a spiral….and it was difficult to manage afterwards.
My 2 cents
ALWAYS listen to your intuition
I think you’re lying to yourself as well as your wife. This is an emotional affair. You spend tons of time talking with and essentially dating another woman with your “museum trips” and lying to your wife about it.
Your friend should find a man of her own. You need to decide who is more important—your wife or your “friend.”
You say “lack of time due to kids” as a reason why your connection is weaker. So let me get this straight: your wife deals with the kids while you have fun talks and museum trips with another woman. And the other woman is just fine with this. She clearly has no regard for your wife.
Just stop it if you want to stay married. Tell your “friend” good bye.
Get tested. Don’t let this go. Ask her to show the time stamp.
Break up already. She just casually forgets to mention that this couple had been trying to involve her in a threesome. Let’s say she didn’t do anything ( which seems unlikely) she still willingly went into the situation knowing there were not pure intentions. That doesn’t look great either.
Reddit is not the place to get answers about this. It’s skewed against trans people and all the complexities being trans comes with.
He kept something from you and that’s not okay. But it’s a lot more complicated than that. You need to check in with yourself and read up on this from other people with trans partners.
You may be more open to this than you realize and have just been blindsided. Think about how much you care for him and what matters most. If that means splitting, that’s okay. But the answer doesn’t have to be break up. Strap ons exist, for starters. Bottom surgery is not a necessity.
You’re both very young. I hope you handle this with an open mind and open heart.
Set a reminder on your phone?
Marriage and kids yes but not for awhile. And yes he is i just dont know what to do about it cuz my bf loves her and doesnt want to change her and is kinda blinded to her poor behavior because of the love for his puppo
I'm sorry to say this but I really don't see how this is anything other than your husband being not only complicit but by the sound of it the instigator of your rape by his twin brother on multiple occasions.
This is not something you work through, this is something you report to the police and absolutely fuck up their entire fucking world for, he PIMPED you out to his brother!
Don't expect him to change if you have kids.
If you aren't happy with your marriage, you don't have to talk yourself into staying unhappy. It's reasonable to want a relationship where you feel valued and appreciated and enjoyed. He may not be interested in offering that.
Thanks but you already have that covered.
Thanks, i'll talk to her about it in the morning. hopefully there's something i can do to help her feel more satisfied with me. I appreciate your reply
If she was ever even depressed! Exactly
Fucking hell been suffering with depression since i was a teen.. who the fuck has the energy to cheat when you barely have the energy to on-line?
There is no set frequency that is appropriate for any type of sexual activity for all people. You guys are currently mismatched, maybe you were before as well. Your partner is being terrible about it, pushing you to do something you don't want. There is no appropriate number of blow jobs to keep this being OK. Because every time you engage in sexual activity you don't want, it might keep him from being an ass for a few days but it is damaging to you and will build bitterness.
If you are mismatched with your libidos then that's how it is. You can use counseling to try and come to a compromise of activity that supports you both and your partner can get input on not being demeaning to you about his needs. If you lost your interest in sex over time- is it medical? is it a sign that your partner is an ass and/or you are depressed? Try to define that for yourself.
Bottom line is there isn't much benefit to determining how many blow jobs keeps your partner around if they also aren't working to better.
It’s not complicated. It’s only been a few months. She’s lied to you and has been talking to at least one guy you know of. No need for confrontation – just end it
Relationships usually don't end instantly for the person who initiates the end. Odds are for weeks/months before he “got up and left” he was already checking out of the relationship and was looking for a way out. For you who didn't see it coming it's instant pain and you're blindsided. For them it was coming for a while so they had all the time in the world to come to terms with what was going to happen.
Do yourself a favor and move on with 0 communication with him in any way. It's not healthy for you and your post confirms as much. Block him on everything and take the time to get in a good head space.
They’re doing an antibody test for herpes. Everything you said is correct. I know what I have to do but I am trying to find the strength to do it. I never planned for a back up plan because I never thought I would need one with him