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Date: December 5, 2022
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>he ask me to don't see other guys when we weren't even official
The audacity
> I did a mistake and I hided the fact that I was gonna see him to my guy
He's not your bf, but even if he was, he can't forbid you to have friends
>idk how he find out about everything
Maybe he's psycho? The type of guy who would not be exclusive and expect you not to have male friends is probably also a stalker.
Invite someone else–the trash took itself out.
What moron sends porn to a kid because he doesn't like the president?! Your brother should go to prison for being stupid even if there is a chance he's not a child predator.
Trust is an earned thing. The next gf you need to enter the relationship with no baggage from your last so therapy is really needed to help guide you. While some women (and men) can’t be trusted, others can. You just need to surround yourself with those that have integrity.
Definitely mental.
Why did this happen?
There is no “WHY” needed here. No reason allows to be physically violent to your partner. If it was a reversed situation of a physically violent husband, everyone would've tell her to get divorce without even saying what she said was wrong and bla-bla.
Unless he is hiding some awful things he did, it looks like he engaged himself to marry a toxic GF that turned into a toxic wife and now is the toxic mom of his kid. I would even risk myself to say that she may have made him toxic.
I still agree with most of the things you said in your comment, and also feel sad for the poor kid that is going to suffer this poor choice of toxic wedding but it is too late for that so all they can do is to change their behavior for him, or to divorce as you mentioned.
Also yes ! Do never tell her if you plan to divorce and try to get custody, we never know what this kind of people are capable of.
Lol. You friend might get off on it. Let it go!
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Are you flushing your tampons? I'm a bit concerned you were googling this. You wouldn't need to Google it unless you'd actually done it. Doesn't justify him screaming at you on the street, but I can understand losing your cool at a partner who willfully caused a lot of damage to presumably the largest asset you own.
Agreed! I’ve never understood it. Even if I was pissed if at someone I was in a relationship with I wouldn’t make him sleep on the couch!
You need therapy to work on your self image far more than plastic surgery, which sounds like it would just be a slippery slope of you never being happy with how you look.
Ans if the guy isn't trying to smash, then I don't see any other reason he wouldn't wanna hang out as a group
You say you are looking at her tits they are on the screen so what. If I was watching something and some jacked dude with nothing but underwear came onto the screen I wouldn’t get all mad at my gf for looking at him. If she said “omg he’s so hot I’d let him do anything to me” then yea I’d be upset. Your gf is being crazy and you need to tell her and stand your ground.
Ew
….you are trying to compare a computer game to something that is (probably still) illegal where you are, costs you money, and already has you addicted.
Is he addicted? Possible, he does show some signs of being addicted to the game based on your post. But unless he’s paying to win, you can play DOTA for free, and it’s not illegal anywhere (yet).
You say that you are unemployed currently, so how are you affording your weed?
And did your addiction or the mental and emotional changes since you stopped your medication in favour for weed have anything to do with your loss of your employment?
Well if it was like that it would be funny) But I know faces of these guys, so that's not possible
Best advice I can give is to practice mindfulness. If you get upset about something, take a moment to think about why you’re upset and what you- or your wife- need to move on from it. You can only control your own emotions, not hers- so break the cycle and figure out what has you upset before initiating and/or trying to fight fire with fire. I have been through something similar and eventually realized my SO and were upset about different things in a disagreement. Understanding why I was upset gave me the space to think about why he was upset.
Start using a coffee cup with a lid and check before you drink
Honestly, it just seems like OP doesn't even have genuine feelings for him. Nowhere does she mention it. Only that he treats her well and he's a nice guy and just gave him a chance. Maybe that's the issue.
Damn you gonna shift the blame to the OP ? That’s fucked lol But say if it WAS all his fault he’s tried communicating with her about it. If she doesn’t let him know what she needs then she’s wrecking their sex life single handedly
Your ears can be permanently transfers by continuous loud sounds
In my own relationship, we have had miscommunications. Twice my partner and I got stranded in town and couldn’t communicate because one of our phones died. We were both immensely stressed. When we rejoined, there were stress tears, and I was upset at her during one such occasion so my own tears were angry.
But not once did either of us scream at the other in public, we did not punch things, we did not try and kick each other out of our shared apartment.
You making mistakes is human. Her reactions however are overblown and manipulative. She should be capable of expressing upset without threatening you with your place of living.
exactly! what an as*ho**
So a new friend, not one with history, is able to appear and become so close to you that you will love together. Seems like the perfect recipe for problems. You're very oblivious to the feelings of others. I'd end it with you if I were her.
I feel like every woman has had a variation of this experience at least once. Kinda sad how consistent that is, honestly and im sorry this went down like it did.
Never trust a guy, even if you grew up with him, they’ll disappoint you eventually.
Don't do that to yourself. I say this not because I think men don't deserve that energy, but because you don't deserve that energy.
By letting him alienate you from the idea of a happy healthy love life, he gets to keep a piece of you, and some permanent real estate in your mind he doesn't deserve.
Recognize there are men out there and you will have to parse through them and it won't be fun, but also recognize for each one you dodge you will be that much the wiser.
I guarantee that after this, you'll at least sense the next one coming if you don't see right through them.
Your love life is for you, not people who would take advantage of you. They will pick at you just to take that away, so don't give them the breadth to influence what makes you happy.
Do you find him to be emotionally mature enough to have rational and well thought out conversations about other things, things that he feels strongly about? Things that HE likes.
I don't see anything wrong with an update. It's not like there are any details that would identify her. I think we are worried about her. It's understandable that you don't want to be in this financial position, but she sounds like a good person, and it can't be easy to be in serious debt, have a low-paying job, still live! at home as an adult, and lose the person you love and apparently hoped to marry. I don't know if she can afford therapy, unless she has insurance to pay for it, but she will definitely need some support. Has she done financial counseling? Maybe that will help her decide about pros and cons of going back to school, and selecting her next career if she does.
Is your name on the lease?
Share what type of experiences? Do you mean open marriage ? Cuz if yes then I might as well just divorce him
I just talked to him and he himself is upset at how mad he gets so there is that. Any strategies for him?
That's actually Hanlon's razor, or the adage “never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained with stupidity.”
Occam's razor is that the simplest explanation is most often the correct one.
Anyways, I don't agree in this scenario because it would require a tremendous amount of stupidity to haggle with someone who was doing you such a large favor already. He very clearly feels entitled to her time and effort.
This is my train of thought
Why would you stay with someone you clearly don’t want to be with because you have kids? That’s all the more reason to leave. Think about the behaviors you’re modeling for your children.