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Mr.Eveyj, 24 y.o.
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Date: December 19, 2022
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I am thinking the best way to tell him that what he did was not good
The best way to say that is to say it directly, don't beat around the bushes
Also don't attack him like he gifted you a slave collar that says “i'm your b*tch”, he fucked up, yes, but giving him crap about it is not as effective as to explaining him why he fucked up so he won't do it again in the future in a calm manner
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I do NOT understand the idea that a gift like that should be approved by the parents. I do agree that home life and space should def be considered because it sucks to get something you have no space for, but that's not the issue here.
NTA.
Your sister's response is understandable in this capitalist hellscape we live! in. It makes sense that she probably has feelings about gifts – there are a lot of weird social expectations and parents want to be the ones to give those to their kids. I also understand (and support) the idea of not wanting to spoil children but, again, that doesn't like the concern here.
She is jealous and responding with emotion. She needs to get over herself and realize that this was a thoughtful gift from someone able to purchase it. Why not, instead, be thankful that there are people in her child's life who care enough to want to share a piece of their own childhood?
Have been cheated on, counseling and more than chances. Nothing work. And it is toxic to keep in going.
Move on, 10 years later, married a true gentleman who treated me like a queen. Wait til you find the right one, even it takes awhile.
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I would of asked them to define their perspective of what confidence looks like. It’s an ambiguous aspect or if dating to rely solely on, as I’m sure an unattractive confident man would require meeting certain standards before a chance is considered. As we all care about looks. Not saying anything is impossible, just slightly more improbable.
You have to come to the realization that this relationship is over.
I am not saying it is all about me. I am worried & scared for him. That's affecting me & my mental health as well. He has told me about all his past & present health issues. He is very open about all that.
It is just when he goes into hospital that he gets weird & I start to panic. We had just settled back into a lovely routine again when boom he's in hospital again.
we have tried it many times, just doesn't work the way we hoped it to
It’s obvious your wife has been sending him those pictures. I can’t believe you are so naive to believe what you have been told. The question now is have they been having an affair. They way they both covered this up makes it obviously that they have. Sorry OP. You are about to enter a world of heartbreak when the truth comes out.
Y'know, I've spent most of my life being very careful not to think about what my parents do in their bedroom and it worked for me. I get that it is an unconventional lifestyle, but it doesn't sound like they were fucking other folk on the couch when you came home from school – why are you so affected by their lifestyle?
Don't get me wrong – polyamoury can mess up families and lead to kids being neglected due to prioritising other partners etc, but that doesn't sound like the case here. Have you considered therapy to address your visceral reaction to this?
Actually I disagree about Sami's reasons for staying with him. I believe she is just an extremely compassionate person who takes her vows seriously. She wants to know that she can live! with her own conscious by not dumping him when he is at his low point. Yes he's an ahole, but she is doing this for her own peace of mind and I commend her.
Take it to your grave or only tell a woman confidant that you are absolutely sure you trust. I know that sounds awful but men are not good with stuff like this and I’m talking about what’s practical not what’s right
What is your marriage? What are y’all saving besides ‘sunk cost’. Open relationships only succeed with a strong level of communication and trust. Your marriage has none of this. There’s absolutely no chance it works after the fact. So you only have ‘for the kids’ and ‘sunk cost’ to fall back upon. That’s not enough to save the marriage. Read ‘Leave a Cheater, Gain a Life’, ‘Cheating in a Nutshell’ and ‘The Body Keeps The Score’. The truth is that she sounds like she wants to monkey branch out. She’s not just looking for casual sex. She’s looking for an exit affair so that her lifestyle isn’t significantly disrupted.
Its not good enough because you keep fucking up.. just leave her alone, YOU DO NOT LOVE HER, you dont treat the people you love like that, you dont betray them, you dont hurt them, you dont manipulate them.. you just like having someone as special as her by your side because in your fucked up mind you think that if someone as beautiful as her can be with you then maybe youre not so worthless so you try everything to not let her go.. but the reality is youre just a narcissist that cant own to his mistakes and blames her for not wanting to put up with anymore of your shit.. just leave her and work on ypurself because its not her job to fix you.
Or the spilling was “assisted” by someone or something. lol
This is what happens when kids have kids lol
Leave this selfish jackass.