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Room for on-line sex video chat 69lola69
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Date: December 19, 2022
choose your husband, duh?. tell your dad that’s unacceptable
Yeah, I think you're right. I left it in because I wanted to let him know this hadn't affected my perception of him, but it felt weird declaring “nothing's changed”
It's so weird to me how it's agreed that you're an adult at 18 and yet (generalizing broadly here) it does seem like most people still have a ton of maturing to do in their 20s.
Man, I don’t blame you for feeling so overwhelmed and burned out. You’re going to school, you’re working, and you’re taking care of things around the house. That is a lot to take on, you must be an amazing father and husband. It’s sad that you had to experience something like this. Normally in the situation like this, the husband or wife is not happy with their marriage, and/or their sex life. It is almost like she is trying to push you to go and sleep with other women, even though you do not want to , so she can go and sleep with other men. Don’t be surprised, if she is already doing so, or has somebody in mind to do so with.
In my opinion, you should see if you can sneak peek into her phone and see if there are any conversations with another man. I hate to put this out there, I’m sure it is heartbreaking, but, I would say check every angle to see what’s going on. Normally what I see on this thread is people who are in your situation and they find out that their spouse is already with a coworker or something to that extent.
Also, whether you have time or not, this is a serious situation. you need to find time to discuss this one on one. Find a babysitter, take the kids to grandma and grandpa’s house, I’m not sure what needs to be done, but this is not a topic that is thrown out in passing.
I wish you the best in your situation. Be wise about your decision, be wise about your conversation. If this ends in a legal battle, things you do or state can totally be used against you. Take care of yourself…
Some people's relationships are built on trust. Others are built on fear and control. Some people are happy when their partners make new friends, who have exciting experiences of their own. Other people are so afraid of being cheated on that they get angry when their partners make new friends. They refuse to allow their partners to make new friends because they are afraid they will be attracted to them and cheat.
Both types of people get cheated on, because there is no real way to prevent cheating. People who are going to cheat are going to cheat. The quality of the relationships you have without being cheated on however? And the quality of partners you can get with respect and trust compared to jealousy and control? I think it's obvious which relationship are better.
You must realise that isn't normal? As kids – sure – but after puberty's over – this just doesn't happen in normal families. You were brutally attacked and your parents not only let it happen – but your mother helped her. And is now blaming you. Grow a spine and put yourself first because your family isn't going to.
Idk why there's so many people saying the husband is in the right. If her mom had bought her a new car would the husband be upset? The answer is definitely no. “BuT iNcReAsEd CoSts” is completely irrelevant considering that's not actually the issue the husband had. There's no scenario where if someone bought my wife a car that I would be angry at them.
Funniest part is she didn’t even raise me ? THANNK GOD about that I guess lol
And they can discuss it before deciding whether or not to keep it. It’s not like OP can force her to keep the car if she declines it. Did he make the smartest decision? No I never said he did I was commenting on the implication that he should’ve gotten the husband’s permission first.
Trap him under the covers and let one out lol no seriously though you married a dumbass. It's your home too so play your trumpet tunes whenever you need to.
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He's an ungrateful sod, next time listen to him, just buy him an xmas card and keep it moving
As a 27 guy when I was younger I said and did all these things when the reality was I wanted whichever girl it was to come over when I wanted, but not have to take them seriously because I honestly wouldn’t if I would have had to make a choice. I liked them, just not enough to be serious.
It’s not kind, sorry you are dealing with this.
Line up somewhere you can move to first, then tell them it's not working for you and go.
She's an alcoholic and anyone who cares for her should let her hit her rock bottom and not go down that path with her. Stop enabling her, don't stand for any disrespect or outbursts. I'm disappointed in you for giving her a place to online after cheating on someone. Keep your distance and hope that she gets sober, and let her know the contingency for being in her life is that she only talks to you or hangs out with you. on days she's not drinking. You guys are young so you don't realize how common this scenario is with alcoholics.
Break up, if you really want to you can offer to support her through this still if she wants you to
He's otherwise awfully honest; if he doesn't like the music i'm playing, or a show i'm watching, he will tell me. Even personal things, like how i've done my hair or makeup.
Sometimes I cook like a chef but most times I make just 'normal' food. I even make the same foods he does with the exact same ingredients, using the same techniques he does.
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Why is that?
A lot of people see how pale I am in the winter & assume I'll burn but I tan. Type III skin I believe.
They're all transitional relationships, until they're not.
Hi. Being uncomfortable snd self conscious during sex is the worst. I’m sorry. Maybe you could work up to it gently. Maybe try sex in total darkness so you can relax, and see how it feels to not actively hide your face. Build some trust and comfort.
I find it appalling that just because this man wants to find a mate based on factors other than sex first, he gets “accused” of being gay? Like, WTF? That accusatory tone makes it sound like it's meant as an insult! It comes off as; “He doesn't hop straight into bed with me, something is wrong, so he must be gay?” ? I've got news for you girlie, if he was gay, he wouldn't be wasting his time hanging out with your shallow self.?
You need to set hot boundaries. You are both adults, tell her you need space. Use your words
Could be the case. She hat aspergers. Maybe it has to do with that. I don't know.
Maybe it's because you are the nicer person ?
There could be all kinds of reasons, some of them sbliminal and not apparent at all.
To me this seems like a non-issue, it's a big hassle for someone to text both people in a relationship. It's always assumed that whoever was contacted will talk to the partner.
he’s upset he says he feels disrespected and that they’re his friends
It sounds like this is his real issue, and this is a him issue that he has to work through. You can try to nudge him into working on it by asking him more about why he feels that way.
Especially since this keeps coming up, it would be good for him to work through his own feelings out loud and for you to finally understand what is really going on.
So do her a favor and break up with her.
Words are cheap. I'm glad to hear you're making up for lost time.
They started officially dating after the divorce.
The fact that they started dating immediately after says that she was his side piece and he left for her.
But after 7 – 8 YEARS of occasional hook ups maybe she felt like she was more into him than he was into her. So she’s on vacation and meets a guy (or two) who’s into her and makes her feel attractive. She knows it’s a fling, but it makes her feel better—like maybe someday she’ll find a guy she likes who’s willing to commit.
Only to come home and find out that guy might be OP. She was probably amazed, and probably felt a little guilty about the hook ups, which is why she told him.
What is rs?
What she couldn’t take a day off,
I am sorry, but it sort of sounds like you're your own worst enemy here.
They invite you out (as friends do). And them expanding the social circle by inviting other people such as B, it makes you feel left out.
I think you should go and participate in these larger gatherings. And then take the initiative to organize smaller group settings where you're more comfortable.
If you refuse to go to this bigger gatherings on a regular basis, you will probably be invited less because you always say no. And then what? You feel even more isolated.
as a “real” victim of rape on multiple occasions, what OP described IS likely sexual assault and it takes nothing away from other assault victims to say so
I'm able to take advice/constructive criticism and acknowledge when I'm wrong. However, there are some posters here I can't help but think are mostly projecting and engaging in cathartic behaviour vilifying someone based on very little information.
It's not that she doesn't do what I want, and when: it's I'm exhausted of doing the lion's share day in and day out and yet there is still disrespect. I struggle with codependent issues, O admit it… however she needs to deal with ADD and I suspect quite more (bipolar disorder, possibly Borderline).
Okay those people are NOT your friends. If you care for Samir and he’s reciprocates in a loving way … friends should be supportive not actively undermining you.
I say this as someone with ADHD. Has he ever looked in to it?
With your education you shouldn’t give one shit what he says. As for other people telling you that you’re intelligent. Who cares? Would you consider yourself dumb if they thought so? STOP listening to all this drivel . YOU decide how smart YOU are. If someone acknowledges your intelligence, thank them. If they insult your intelligence, shrug. Who cares? YOU need to know who YOU are. Once YOU recognize YOUR own intelligence, based on YOUR experiences, achievements and continued learning, no one can make you feel small, stupid or doubtful. Who knows what you have learned more than YOU? Who knows your capacity for learning better than YOU? This man ? Not a chance. I’m sure he’s smart in his own way. He should focus on HIS strengths. YOU should focus on yours. A relationship isn’t a competition. Cooperate with one another, you take up the slack of his weaknesses, he takes up the slack of yours. No one’s opinion of you matters more than YOURS.
What do your living arrangements look like? If y’all are sharing a home evenly, that sounds plenty fair
But aren't there cases where breaks work
Why are you dating him then?
If i see your other postings… why are you eith him? He cheats on you several time. He scream on you so often that you got used on it. You are overall unhappy. You are just 26. You deserve more! You need to break free of this abusive relationship. Or do you want to stay like this for the next 50 years? Don't you want a relationship full of respect, trust, love, support and harmony? He gives you nothing of it. And yelling is the first step to more aggressive behaviour like throwing things, punching walls or punching you.
You also should go to therapy. He has trained you to accept his abuse. He has damaged you so much…
If you decide to break of with him, don't be alone with him. Yelling is a form of aggression. And you never know when it will get worse. When people get in rage, you never know what they will do, so be careful.
There’s no finishing for anyone?
I can see that but I believe this woman has to know this guy has a thing for her. He can’t stop talking to his own wife about her I can’t imagine how he acts around her! I don’t blame the young woman for anything, totally the husband acting like a fool! I think it’s probably obvious why he helped his former personal assistant get a better job at his new employment. He can’t stand not seeing her!
Even if you could 1000% confirm that they would never cheat again, the ruined trust alone is enough to destroy the relationship. You deserve better OP.
Wow. Yes stop having sex now. If he can’t take this seriously, what else will he brush off?
You guys don’t stand a chance
People love to hang a cross on their shitty behavior so they can get “forgiven”.
If you felt like the ultimatum was right when you made it, then trust your gut. Our gut doesn't lie. You were ready for the next step. He may very well never be ready, and that's okay. It just means you are at different places in life, with different expectations. It sucks that it has to be this way. I know that it does. You did the right thing for yourself, though.
As someone else pointed out already, love definitely isn't always enough. It would not be so hot. While relationships do take work, you both would have known by now if this was a path you were supposed to take together.
Better to find out now. This way it's going to be painful. But each day it will get a little easier. It will hurt a little bit less. You'll be happy again. Make sure you surround yourself with people who love and support you.
Dump him
Wife deserves to know the type of man she married and even closure if he is gaslighting, lying, manipulating her to keep his secret hidden.
Wife deserves to know the type of man she married and even closure if he is gaslighting, lying, manipulating her to keep his secret hidden.
Hate to say it, it probably doesn't even matter that he's doing it with you, he sounds like a horn dog who will stick it anywhere.
Why don't you break up?
Textbook gaslighting at that!
Dictator.
It is NOT “helping you” it's doing his fair share of the work. You need to see a marriage counselor because right now you're being treated like a glorified bang-maid and this IS disrespectful, using, relationship-ending behavior. For now? Quit with the work. Make sure you have enough saved up to buy food for yourself, one meal at a time, when the groceries run out, and just STOP. Wash your clothes but if you run out of detergent? Get pods, leave them in the car, and only take out what you need for a single load. Are the bills in both names or just his? Any bill in his name, don't worry about making sure it's paid. Just…stop. It'll drive you nuts to be in a filthy house for awhile, but once he finally starts doing his share, make sure you do NOT get caught in the “doing it all” trap again. Don't assume you should make supper, don't do his laundry, don't pick up the living room, and if the kitchen gets messy, get yourself a single plate/bowl/spoon/cup and wash and use as needed. Put 99% of the work on him for a few months and let him see how much work that absolutely is. Give couples counseling a try, then see if he's happy wallowing in filth…and this is relationship-ending if he doesn't improve 🙁
He's doing it to tie you up and keep tabs on you. If you're on FaceTime with him, you can't be going places and doing things without him.
Just be straight with him. “Hey, I'm not interested in being on FaceTime while you play with your friends as I have other things I can be doing so I'm going to hang up now. Talk to you later!” I bet you any money he will get angry. I'm 99.99% sure it's a control thing.
Also, just because a guy likes to FaceTime, text, chat or call a lot, doesn't mean you have to even if you don't mind. It's good to set the boundary at the very start that you have your own life and aren't going to be available to him every second of every day. Even if you aren't doing anything but reading a book or watching Netflix, time alone is essential for growth and self-discovery.
She call me a pussy all the time, because she'll yell at me and shut me down in conversations and I won't argue back because she threatens to leave or cold shoulder me for the whole day.
Abuse
She'd ask me where I'm going, who I'm with, what I'm doing at all times of the day but would never just tell me where she's going under the guise of “I told you yesterday, if you really cared you'd remember”.
Controlling
she wouldn't let me wear a condom during sex, and threatened it she ever got pregnant she would leave me and never talk to me again.
Control, manipulation and downright insanity
she would use her dominating personality to crush me mentally, and use that to her advantage.
Abuse
This woman is a giant walking abusive red flag. Please get some professional help to talk through everything and learn how to stand up for yourself. Most importantly if someone refuses to use a condom when you want to, do not sleep with them.
Honestly, I’d leave before I ended up pregnant. Life is too short to spend waiting on a lazy, unappreciative man that you resent. You probably have another 50 years on this planet, I sure wouldn’t want to spend it like this.
Why are you engaged now? You're 21 and he's 22. How on earth are you ready for marriage? Have you lived on your own yet? Do you have a career already? Do you have any savings?
You told him his social media comments to other women made you uncomfortable. Instead of apologizing for stepping over a boundary, he blamed you for looking at his social media, where those comments he made were publicly visible. That's not digging!
Don't marry a guy who disrespects simple relationship boundaries. Online your life first. Make your money so you never have to be dependent on a man. Then get married when it's optional, not desperation.
I mean if I were in your situation I probably would have broken up with him by now.
Since you're still together I'd guess that means you don't want to, and that's your choice to make. I would recommend setting a boundary with him – you don't want to hear about your SIL's comment anymore or be guilt-tripped. He's said what he felt he needed to say, seemingly repeatedly. If you're not giving him the response he's seeking, he needs to either a) let you know what exactly he's looking for with those conversations, or b) just accept you aren't going to respond how he wants and just drop it. Sounds like he just wants to stay angry instead of actually working through and processing his feelings about the interaction though.
Yes people do get tested on a regular basis. Many people can be symptomless carriers of infection. If you are sexually active and non monogamous, you should be having regular STI testing, even if you wear a condom.
What are you, his lawyer?
Let her know it makes you uncomfortable. Just talk with her about it not us. Assuming she’s a normal person she’ll talk with you about it and you guys can figure it out.
Everyone , can u send me replies on my dms , i have a bug on reddit and i can’t see the comments , i would really appreciate it
Ah yes, push it back onto sister again.
Perhaps sister thought her parents would be capable of acceptance. You. Can make up all the random variables you want but the facts are.
SIL brought her GF over hoping for love and acceptance. Parents yelled at and berated her in front of the entire family(being surprised by something isn't an excuse for hateful behavior). Husband did nothing to stand up for his sister, or his wife when his parents started into her. Husband SHRUGGED when asked if he would be okay with one of his children being gay.
Husband owes some people apologies
Listen to your friends and family. You are living the proof – you had a brief encounter with her and it set back your healing. For now, stay no contact and be even more disciplined about it. If she’s somewhere, you aren’t. Don’t stay if you see her. Don’t talk to her. Don’t hug her.
You won’t regret it. She seems a bit of a mess and she doesn’t seem to be considering your needs and feelings.
❤️ ? ? %
I think she needs a different therapist because liking women doesn’t have to mean that she doesn’t like you. People can be bi and really there’s so many different form of sexual desire and expression. Wheb she’s less fraught it could be that she’s bi and mostly prefers women but isn’t exclusive.
I think that decisions made when emotions are running high aren’t always the correct ones.
I saw a sweet TikTok from a woman who was married with two tiny kids when she realised that she was a lesbian. She and her now Ex husband are still best friends, still each other’s biggest supporter and coparent nicely. Each has a new partner and it has all worked out great for them. This doesn’t have to be a tragedy. Sad, but not catastrophic.
But if you love this woman, comfort her.