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MERRY CHRISTMAS!!whoever controls me gets my snap plus some hard content!!! [Goal Race]
Date: December 25, 2022
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Don’t contact him again. He knows he’s c0cked up here. You don’t say how long you’ve been together. Maybe the pressure of meeting your family was too much.
Buy a copy of The Rules. Don’t treat it as gospel but it’s worth a read.
You sound desperate for bullshit stories to retain their effectiveness for you.
I used to dress with crop tops but when I got into my relationship I stopped bc I felt I was somewhat disrespectful and I love wearing non crop tops now they’re so cozy. Regarding your sex life, I think you should end it bc a relationship is about sex too and you don’t want to and he does and you shouldn’t feel forced to have sex. Y’all don’t seem sexually compatible. I’d say treat each other better and if y’all can’t then leave
Thank you for the advice this was very helpful, you gave me faith 🙂
Get your home professionally cleaned and change the locks.
Well you did it with kindness in your heart and good intentions, but you've learned your lesson. I don't think you need to spend more energy on wishing that you could help her, because you probably can't. She's not sober and until she is you need to be very careful because the chaos will continue to cross over into your life.
I remember being your age and everybody making it an unspoken rule to not have an opinion about other people's usage of drugs or alcohol. Like we all respect each other enough to trust that we're making good decisions for ourselves, even when that was obviously not true. Self-moderation isn't possible for people predisposed to addiction, and I'm speaking from personal experience.
If you're comfortable telling her you think she needs to get sober you can probably say it once but expect her to react poorly and lash out again.
Sometimes, it takes a big tragedy to get sober. For me I lost a relative to suicide and I told myself I didn't want to depend on alcohol while I needed to grieve. Maybe she will hear you if you tell her you think it's for her own good that she put down alcohol and focus on healing.
Dude you’re the safety net. You’re not the one she wants but just in case it doesn’t work out with the ex you’re there. Stay friends but move on relationship wise. You are better than just being someone’s second option.
actually no that’s not true cause when he brought it up it wasn’t to complain, it was to bring up an observation because we had a similar conversation come up and it was to actually bring up my hypocrisy..
Wouldn’t be better to just TALK to her to work this out instead of outright dumping her? Give her some warning?
Hey. Dont be like my mom. Dont just keep getting hurt and hurt and hurt and just keep staying and hanging onto broken promises and excuses. You’ll just keep wasting important years of your youth on someone that doesnt want to change. Please talk to a divorce attorney about your options.
I’ll amend my comment, but point still stands that his partner has issues
Can this statement please be issued to all men upon the commencement of their sex lives?
Whatever you decide to do, bear in mind that you will also have to deal with the stigma of having herpes should you get it and break up. And it will be a lot more difficult as a man.
What a kind thing to say. I hope you never have an issue in life you need help with.
Because your comment makes no sense. She isn't a 5 year old child that doesn't know what sex or healthy contact is? She's a teenager
I think the actual act of dropping them off is fine. But the scouting for scared women is a little weird. Like if you had left out that you “look” for women then I think everyone here would have a much better mindset regarding this.
I’ve been waiting ages to find this comment on a post ?? so many people get it wrong
It hurts to hear but I think you’re right. I find myself exhausted everyday and I just chalked it up to my sleep apnea but i lately have only been able to go to work and sleep. I think I just have a very hot time trying to push myself to leave in fear of hurting her and her doing something to herself. I know I’m not responsible for someone being suicidal but this is how my last relationship worked out and I don’t know if I can go through that pain again
As someone else on the spectrum with an anxiety disorder…. I don’t have a single clue what to tell you here. Do they typically have issues understanding things when they’re said point blank like this? They don’t have a trigger but do they not fully understand what a trigger is?
Yeah top comment is right.
Consdiering you dont want to hear that, If you still have contempt for her over this please be kind and leave her. She doesnt deserve to be with someone who resents her
Starting to see why everyone makes fun of redditors
Thank you so much for saying this and not being judgmental, I truly appreciate it.
Someone else actually asked me about ADHD via private message. I looked into it because I didn’t know too much about it and it’s an interesting thought I will discuss with my therapist. I don’t think I have most signs of ADHD, maybe only a couple.
I don’t think anything happened that reminded me of a stressful time in my teen years. I do remember feeling obsessed when I was a teenager although probably not as much and there was no consequences or marriage on the line at the time.
Your suggestions are very good and I will definitely try them. Thank you so much ??
What bullshit. I assembled a lot of IKEA furniture and didn’t need assistance. If you were my husband I would have told you that you’d better stay and get the flat pack assembly practice because you’ll need it for your own place.
You should’ve been home. Do not pass go or collect your $200 bucks!
Yes
Grow a backbone and end it
This will probably get buried, but this comment is for me as much as it is for you, kind stranger. About five hours ago, I broke up with my boyfriend of 5 years (next week would have been our anniversary). We online together and don't have kids but have multiple pets. We still love each other so much, but right now I need to not be in a relationship because I have things I need to work out on my own. He has his own things to work on too, but this break up is going like a dream. Because we care about one another, we want what is best for each other. We are having the best conversation about our relationship that we've ever had, what was good, but mostly what didn't work for both of us and what we need right now as individuals. I know that we will be better people both for this relationship and how we are managing our new relationship moving forward. You and your soon to be ex will be so much better for this break up and I think you both know that. All we did was sit down on the couch, the same way we've always done whenever we talk, and I just told him how I felt. That's all you need to do. So don't over think it, just trust her and yourself, and that everything will work out the way it needs to. Good luck.
No you aren’t wrong
I think it’s just a shock, because reality has finally kicked in that you’re both moving on, but that you’ll ultimately get over it quickly.
Separately, you’re just not thinking logically. You said he treated you poorly. You’re now asking how he could be good to her but not you. They just became official. You have no idea how he is or how he’ll be.
He sounds terrible. Please see the red flag, and do not waste your time on him.
Do you know if your sister and her bf have an open relationship? If it was my sister I would tell her how disappointed I am and blah blah, but I wouldn’t say anything directly to him.
He can be a great guy and all that but my loyalty is with her, she is my sister and it’s her relationship, but I would definitely push her to tell him.
With that comment of his alone would make me break up with him.
I guess that would be subjective, but you were saying you would throw your computer out the window for a supermodel. Would you still pitch it for a cute girl next door type?
That's fucking horrific. I'd immediately block him on everything and cancel that friendship. No sane, empathetic person would find that entertaining and many wouldn't even be able to watch the video. It makes me sick to think about.
That’s very true, thank you. I think I am so torn up about the ending of the relationship because once people grow older, relationships aren’t as wholesome and silly in the beginning – I won’t be able to share that experience with someone again, and grow into a more mature relationship.
You're good. I would have left after he announced to the park that his hemorrhoid's burst. I feel bad because that situation is awful, but dude! Can you not wait for 5 mins to clean yourself? Also no bathing between the beach and other activities is gross and a great way to get an infection. Be glad you got a free trip despite the issues.
Curiosity kills the cat
Tell her! TF?!
Having a second wedding is not the solution. Firmly cutting John out of your lives forever is. What a cruel thing to do to a ‘friend’ on what should be one of the best days of their lives.
I mean tbf I feel like that seems to be judging him on his brand of comedy. None of us know the guy irl. He could be like the percentage mentioned above but in reserve, a giant walking red flag that's made up of increasingly smaller red flags, or he could just be a dud.
I can’t follow, I’m confused
Agree, don’t give that poor girl extra burden to listen to the excuses and to force OP to own the fact
It's not like you can erase the past. Past relationships are part of who you are.
I would maybe see if anyone else has noticed this type of behavior as well. Because if he's randomly getting upset in general, it is very different from if he's only getting upset at home or with you. I'd also recommend bringing this up when you're both very calm and not after he's just done something out of character or rude. Chances are in those moments his hormones are all over the place and he's already upset you so you're both going to give very emotional or adrenaline fueled responses. Talking to him when you're both calm, away from these incidents, may help you explain more clearly and allow him to see from a different perspective. Also, don't immediately blame it on this whatever product he's taking. It very well may be the cause but saying it will probably make him defensive. Just say that you miss your time together and that lately you don't feel he's been treating you well. Say that you're upset by what you consider to be rude remarks or dismissals of your feelings and that you don't think your relationship used to be like that. If he's still not willing to see things then you may wanna involve a friend or family member or two. Not to gang up on him and say you're right. But sometimes we are willing to listen to a friend or a father in certain situations than our spouses etc… if he continues after that? Then warm him that you won't tolerate this anymore and you'll leave if it continues. And if it continues, which art this point it probably will but you never know, then yes you'll have no choice but to leave.
Congrats… at 18, you now know how to either spot the crazy, or spot the guy digging for an excuse to break up with you/cheat on you (because he can't have sex with someone who was once a baby!). Most don't learn that for a few more years.