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Date: September 18, 2022
Honestly I have the feeling that she just doesn't care about me most of the time. She has time and makes for all of her friends but never for me or our kids. I've got so many mixed feelings all the time I don't know what to do but freeze and I get really shaky.
Yeah I'd just pick another date. Due dates are a crapshoot anyway.
Have you spent many hours connecting with this person on an intimate emotional level?
You can't love someone by passively observing them in a work setting. It's unhealthy to place such a person at the center of your thoughts like this. This is the path on which all stalkers tread. I'm not saying that you're a stalker or that you would ever be one. But I would bet you dollars to donuts that she would be creeped out if she knew that you were having these thoughts.
You should indeed talk to him regarding this and try to communicate it. However, me, personally, I wouldn't wait until the inevitable happens.
I was very harsh on my wife's father early in our marriage. It took a decade for me to realize he is one of the best people I know. Sometimes when you think you have your shit together, really you are just a judgmental piece of shit like I was. Your dad is the salt of the earth and with time the world will teach your husband that
lmao its funny bc shes so angry about it. idk if the backpack holds some sort of significance to her, but this should honestly be something you guys can laugh about and perhaps turn into a silly memory. u even offered to buy her a new back and replace it. i think ignoring u and giving u the cold shoulder is so unnecessary and mean. its not like u did it on purpose and the fact that she doesnt understand that, is pretty alarming.
Thank you. My priority before kids is a solid bond with my partner. That's what I used to justify waiting a year for a kid. And that's what Im making sure as hell I've got in place now before moving forwards. Her flaws aren't hot to see, and I can see they cross her mind on occasion. But motivating that 'I want to change' element is so hard. I think it'll only come if she feels she really has something to lose.
There are so many red flags for why you shouldn't be with this man. But mainly je is ABUSIVE. He doesn't care about you, doesn't want to have a child with you, doesn't care about risks the abortion could cause you.
Regardless whatever you decide to do with the baby, leave this guy. He is no good for you.
Fuck you
I agree this already thoughtful gift can use a gesture little more romantic but I have different thought here than a photo frame- maybe you could watch a movie you both like together on it on the day you gift it? Maybe you can get a movie or two that you really like and know she’s hadn’t seen to watch together? This can be something you can continue in the future like your own collection of movies you two like to watch together? I think building shared moments and memories like these could be a lot more romantic than remembering their favourite movie one time. You can even include a sweet note saying how much you look forward to spending time together & sharing one another fav movies on this player ? Ofcourse this only works if you stay together; but if you do (which I super hope you do based on how you speak of her!) this would be hella romantic to look back on … I’m rooting for you internet stranger!
250 is a little high for a gift in such a new relationship anyway
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Block him on everything so that next time he gets the idea of pulling this off again, the only thing that he's going to get is an unsent message to make him feel like the clown he is.
Can you drop off the kids with other relatives while you work? They should feel safe and not hungry.
I'm unsure as to why she's changed her behavior since she was fine in August but it's not something you can fix. You and your husband need to come to an agreement soon. But in the meantime protect your children.
Don’t stress yourself too much man
Focus on yourself and things that makes you happy. Surround yourself with supportive friends and family.
You can’t accidentally cheat and he can’t make up his mind about what actually happened. And he knows better than to drink if he’s taking medication that could have a reaction so at this point he’s just self sabotaging. Be done with him.
I’m a man I have a 4 year old boy and almost 2 year old girl. They’ve showered with my wife, with me, and with grandparents, together and separately. Nudity is not inherently sexual and children are nothing wrong with nudity. We need to teach them even if we feel awkward because of hangups we were taught it’s no big deal. This is an issue where you need to take the time to adjust it’s nothing to be concerned about.
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Well, count your lucky stars that your idiot husband is this stupid. Otherwise, he wouldn’t have let you transfer his files from one iPhone to another and you wouldn’t know what a cheating POS he is. He is either dumber than a bag of rocks or he’s been doing this so long and getting away with it that he got careless and thought you wouldn’t notice his texts. I would follow everyone else’s advice and take this fool to the cleaners and get tested ASAP!
Updateme
I personally HATE watching movies or TV. And instantly fall asleep when I do. With my boyfriend or not. I'll just pass out. But when I game I can game for literally 20 hours and not get tired. Tv may not be his hobby.
Find something else to do with him. Maybe set up a date night. Or try to game with him. My man and I just spent 12 hours playing World of Warcraft together. And it was a blast.
BAHAHAHAHA
Has he shown any signs of anything inappropriate going on (hang out with her after work a lot, frequently in private, 1-on-1 settings)? Or is it just a run-of-the-mill friendship with a coworker?
So? Maybe most women in his environment don't want flowers… are you really holding this over his head?
You kissed for the first time yesterday, he's most likely overly nervous, figuring out how to take things day by day.
Just talk to him, this isn't a big deal.
This^
Block him on everything and cut contact. Dude is ill and controlling
You should tell your boyfriend this. Tell him you are disappointed and sad and angry. Tell him that you were really really looking forward to this and you needed this vacation with just the 2 of you, and this situation has now become stressful instead of relaxing. Make the best of it, even if that means going off by yourself without your boyfriend and his cousin. Do your best not to put him on the defensive, but you should still Definitely make VERY clear to him that what he did is totally unacceptable, and he should NEVER extend such an invitation to ANYONE again EVER without checking with you first ahead of time, no matter how sure he is that the other person will decline.
You aren't even having sex together and she doesn't want you masturbating??
Pass.
You can make peace with her memory after she dies. If this is for you, it's on your terms. And you don't have to fix everything just because she's dying.
Even if their just “legally married” or whatever, the fact that he lied to you about it should tell you a lot.
Yep, this is my sister. I'm an extremely punctual person (Maybe from being in the Army, idk, but I absolutely hate being late and make every effort to get to my location 10-15 min early). With my sister it's not just 10-15 mins late every now and then. She is constantly an hour+ late to everything. Just this past weekend we were meeting at a bar at 4:30. I texted her at 4:15 saying I'd be at the bar in 5. She responded at like 4:45 saying “Oh crap I'm not even dressed yet”. Didn't show up til almost 6. Lover her to death but it is absolutely infuriating.
I would ask her to get an individual therapist before going back. Either that or you should end things and not get caught up in sunk cost fallacy. This relationship has never been heathy and she has always resented you.
I don’t feel comfortable with him sexually currently
Then kick him out, why is he still around? Infact why have you let this abuse get so bad in the first place?
What is even the point of posting these posts here? As a 25yo don’t you have your own judgement? Why do you need validation from us about something that should be so obvious?
This is asked in almost every post that I see these day. But it bears repeating – why are you with this man? Is no one else in your town available? Have all other men died or gotten married?
‘But I love him’ – ok what exactly about him do you love? Because people usually fall in love with a good person. Someone who is kind and respectful and actually cares about us. Your bf coerced you into sex, ‘forgets’ condoms, told you to your face he doesn’t care about your boundaries, and you’re out here meandering about if you’re overreacting. Okay.
He then said “To be honest, it’s not my job to uphold your boundaries, it’s on you”.
And here’s the kicker – HE’S NOT WRONG! Yes, you truly are the one who’s supposed to uphold your own boundaries, and not him. Now the question is – why is it that you don’t do it? Why do you keep people around that don’t respect your boundaries? He may be the circus, but you’re the one that keeps buying the tickets. And yes as long as you keep buying the ticket to the clowns show the actual problem is you, not him.
I don’t feel comfortable with him sexually currently
Then kick him out, why is he still around? Infact why have you let this abuse get so bad in the first place?
What is even the point of posting these posts here? As a 25yo don’t you have your own judgement? Why do you need validation from us about something that should be so obvious?
This is asked in almost every post that I see these day. But it bears repeating – why are you with this man? Is no one else in your town available? Have all other men died or gotten married?
‘But I love him’ – ok what exactly about him do you love? Because people usually fall in love with a good person. Someone who is kind and respectful and actually cares about us. Your bf coerced you into sex, ‘forgets’ condoms, told you to your face he doesn’t care about your boundaries, and you’re out here meandering about if you’re overreacting. Okay.
He then said “To be honest, it’s not my job to uphold your boundaries, it’s on you”.
And here’s the kicker – HE’S NOT WRONG! Yes, you truly are the one who’s supposed to uphold your own boundaries, and not him. Now the question is – why is it that you don’t do it? Why do you keep people around that don’t respect your boundaries? He may be the circus, but you’re the one that keeps buying the tickets. And yes as long as you keep buying the ticket to the clowns show the actual problem is you, not him.