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1. You should believe what him when he tells up this will be a problem. Chances are, unless you are A. Willing to cover or B. Allow him and his religion to dictate the boundaries in your family this will not be sustainable.

   I know that as someone not from that background that seems ridiculous, but I spent my teens and 20 in an Evangelical, lightly fundamentalist church and the reality is that this won’t work if you aren’t willing to just become what he expects. This is going to become an every widening rift (likely right around the time you really commitment/get marry/have kids).

   People who think things like your marriage wouldn’t be real and he’ll be in heaven but you won’t… That’s some pretty deep fundamentalist evangelicalism. Maybe he’ll try to meet you gals way but it’s really, really, really unlikely he’ll be able to or willing to let go of those issues. He erring be open to compromising and either you’ll keep giving in to him and grow to resent him or you’ll hold your ground and he’ll resent you.

   Also, you should be asking him what his church teaches in things that are important to you: abortion, trans right, LGBTQ acceptance, women working after having children, who does the housework, are both partners equal it is the husband “the head”?

   I know it feels like you are madly in love with him, but you don’t really know him yet (studies show we don’t REALLY know our partners for 18-24 months). You have that early kind of love, he’s the kind of person you could really love. But long term relationships require more than that; they need mutual respect, empathy, a desire to understand and know more about your partner… he automatically thinks less of you because you aren’t Christian – you are starting off in wildly uneven footing.

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