Long story short, for the past months I’ve been dating way out of my league. My girlfriend is gorgeous, popular, smart, well-educated and comes from a rich family. I’m average looking, college dropout, don’t make much money and I’ve always wondered what she saw in me. I feel like people are always staring at us and think how could someone like me be with a woman like her.
Our relationship has been great, we even talked about moving in together in the near future. But she has been cold and distant for the past few days, ever since we ran into my ex on the street. My ex was a nice person but not nearly as beautiful or stylish as my girlfriend. We exchanged a few words and continued walking. My girlfriend asked me who that girl was and I said “my ex”. She replied with “oh, okay” and started acting weird.
Today while she was taking a shower, I saw a message on her phone from one of her friends. “Please, don’t dump the dude, he adores you” it said. I know her password and I’m embarrassed to admit that I couldn’t resist to snoop. It was a long conversation but basically my girlfriend said that she felt second-hand embarrassment when she saw my ex and couldn’t be with someone who’s slept with “something like that”. That she found my ex on facebook and stalked her and could tell believe that I’ve dated such a low-life person. That she deserves a man with better taste and that she’s out of my league.
I don’t know what to do, I thought I found my person but it seems that she’s embarrassed of me. I don’t see how I’m in the wrong here or what I can do to keep this relationship going. Obviously I can’t turn back time.
Update:
Wow, this blew up, thank you so much for the advice and support. So that’s the update:
We’ve had a long talk, like an hour long. She basically said that she was angry in general because of how little I think of myself. That I’m a great person but refuse to see it. Said that she’s tired of seeing me wasting my potential and refusing to change my awful low-paid job because I’m afraid of getting what I deserve. She thinks that I underestimate myself and surround myself with average people because I think I’m like them. Basically told me that she wants a person with more self-esteem who is the afraid to take what’s rightfully theirs. Told me she needed time and that I use the time apart to work on myself and how I view the world.
I won’t pressure her and I’ll listen to her advice and use the time to reflect on myself and my life choices.
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