I could make a judgement call on you lying to him about this, I also want to be sympathetic about your anxieties, but what's a much bigger concern to me is the reason why you feel the need to lie in the first place.
Your husband is supposed to be the person you trust most, the person who is always in your corner, the person on this earth who he loves as much if not more than himself, and a person who always respects your comfort and peace of mind.
Yet you feel you can't even have a conversation with him about a very real anxiety that would affect both you two's intimacy without it devolving into a fight where he asserts his desire to overstep your boundaries or withhold sex. You don't say that you are afraid he'll do that, you say you know he will so you are lying to him to get him to continue wearing condoms. That is…alarming and unhealthy.
If you can't have a conversation about something as simple as this then how will you handle more complicated issues? Supposing you two do have children down the line and you want to make a choice regarding your child you feel he will disagree with, will you lie to him and your child about it? The foundation of a relationship is trust and honesty, how would he feel if he found out you don't trust him about this? And if he wouldn't care about your feelings and insist upon his own then why did you get married to him?
I could make a judgement call on you lying to him about this, I also want to be sympathetic about your anxieties, but what's a much bigger concern to me is the reason why you feel the need to lie in the first place.
Your husband is supposed to be the person you trust most, the person who is always in your corner, the person on this earth who he loves as much if not more than himself, and a person who always respects your comfort and peace of mind.
Yet you feel you can't even have a conversation with him about a very real anxiety that would affect both you two's intimacy without it devolving into a fight where he asserts his desire to overstep your boundaries or withhold sex. You don't say that you are afraid he'll do that, you say you know he will so you are lying to him to get him to continue wearing condoms. That is…alarming and unhealthy.
If you can't have a conversation about something as simple as this then how will you handle more complicated issues? Supposing you two do have children down the line and you want to make a choice regarding your child you feel he will disagree with, will you lie to him and your child about it? The foundation of a relationship is trust and honesty, how would he feel if he found out you don't trust him about this? And if he wouldn't care about your feelings and insist upon his own then why did you get married to him?