I am a regular Reddit user but throwaway for obvious reasons.
My husband and I both are lawyers in different areas of expertise. Our marriage has been mostly good unless it involves his extended family.
On Saturday was his cousins baby shower. I was unable to attend so I gifted her a rather generous voucher which I mentioned to my husband.
On Monday my husband approaches me saying that his cousin did not receive the gift and wanted me to produce proof via my banking app. I refused and that escalated into an argument.
He became extremely aggressive and started saying that I have no love for him, etc etc. I remain calm and didn't raise my voice or use vulgar language as he did. At one point he started telling repeatedly "I hate you so much", took off hus jacket and flung it onto our bed He then stormed towards me still yelling but holding his pointer finger right up at my face. I asked him to move his finger from my face but he kept yelling "make me, what r u going to do". He called me a psychopath because I am so calm but "as cold as ice".
Our 6yr old ran into our room at that time and he backed off when she started crying really naked. He continued to use foul language for a bit as I kept asking our daughter to leave the room. He was shouting at me "to shut the fu.. up".
He has never been this aggressive before and I feel that he would have hit me and was trying to provoke me.
Is finger pointing in that manner borderline violence or abuse? I have no idea how to move past this. Even our daughter is afraid of him but she loves him dearly. Thoughts on what I should make of the outburst and what I should do would be most appreciated.
Edit – he hates that I esrn more than he does but we online comfortably. I think he has anger issues that were well hidden from me until now.
submitted by /u/ThrowRA101290
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