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Control my pussy wanna be urs [Multi Goal]
Date: October 8, 2022
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He does so many things that I told him multiple times that I don't like.
he doesn't want to spend time with me as much as I do and he doesn't show any effort in our relationship he isn't supportive at all, sometimes I feel like he enjoys me being hurt by other people he doesn't show any type of intimacy, and he always shuts every door I try to open in order to connect more with him he ghosts me a couple of days with no explanation he's not open enough with me and sometimes he's not honest he hates when I tell him my negative emotions or any negative experience I've had in my daily life (not only our relationship)
Every time I tell him about one of these things he starts playing the victim.. I started hating him for that. These are a couple of things I suffer with, it makes it impossible to connect with him on a deeper level, I have a deeper connection with my good friends than him, and it hurts me that I am the one who always makes the effort while having nothing in return.
If you have an abortion because he doesn’t want kids, you will resent him. It will eat away at you until it explodes out of your mouth and it will almost certainly mean the end of your relationship and the destruction of your mental health.
But.
You need to prepare to be a single parent. Because forcing him to be a dad when he has been clear that he doesn’t want kids is also going to lead to resentment and the death of your relationship.
Please get everything settled in your mind and then tell him you’re pregnant, that it’s his, and that you’re having it. Let him know that you understand he never wanted kids and this wasn’t intentional. Tell him that you can’t have an abortion and you’ll understand if this means you two can’t be together.
He still needs to provide child support. But he can give up physical custody. And he probably will.
I’m sorry you’re not going to get everything you want. But you can still be happy. Good luck!
First it is not you. This has nothing to do w you or your looks, attitude etc. This is about him and his complete disregard for your feelings and disrespecting you and your entire relationship.
Not all men do this.
If this were me and my wife did this I would tell her in no uncertain terms that if this is what she wants, & continues to disrespect me & our marriage then I would completely end our marriage. We’ve been together 31 years and it would be extremely naked but I’d rather be alone than to be disrespected by the one person who is supposed to love me and treat me w respect. Not lay beside me in bed sending random nude/half naked men’s pictures to her friends talking about how nude they are etc.
This behavior would put a wedge In any relationship. I can see how you’d feel a disconnect in the relationship. Understand how you’d second guess any time you were intimate whether he’s thinking of those people they’ve followed, looked at and shared w friends saying how attractive they are.
What makes your situation worse is it sounds like this isn’t the first time he’s done this w the promise of stopping. Yet he continues. He’s even bold enough now that he isn’t hiding it. He’s doing it right beside you knowing you can see what he’s doing. Further lying and disrespecting you & the relationship. I don’t know how long y’all have been together or how long this has been going on but this behavior would be worth ending it all over. Because with him doing this it makes you feeling devalued and unloved and makes you feel unattractive because he’d rather lay in bed looking at other women rather than cuddling w you or making love. He’s essentially putting other women over you.
Is this as bad as physically cheating? No. But it does put doubt in your mind among all the other feelings that comes w it. He simply doesn’t care how it makes you feel or he would never have started this and if so he would have stopped the first time you voiced your concern and told him how it hurts you.
I wish you the best and you deserve to be respected and loved in your relationship. If he can’t do this is it worth staying? That’s for you to determine.
I'm gonna go against the grain and take my downvotes but OP, I hope you see this for an alternate perspective. I don't know the guy but I don't think he meant anything negative with his joke. Vaginas and penises are just kinda weird looking when you really start to examine them. It doesn't mean he doesn't like yours.
Keep in mind, reddit commenters in this sub tend to be overly sensitive. And when you say nothing has ever hurt you like this, I think you're being a little oversensitive too. Why is a vagina looking like what “his pancakes look like” a bad thing? I think you're a young woman and you're hypersensitive to any comments on your appearance because women are judged on appearance far more than men and it's more important to you all. My partner is in her 30s and is still sensitive about anything I might say about her appearance, always looking for a negative as a defense mechanism. I can tell her she's absolutely gorgeous 1000 times and get little reaction. But then if I make one comment like “don't eat all the donuts, I want some” she automatically, reflexively thinks I'm saying she's fat.
I would bet what your bf said was meant as humor and his attempt just flopped. It happens. Don't make too much of it. There is an extremely low chance that he actually doesn't like your vagina. In fact, he probably dreams about your vagina and would paint an homage to it if he had the painting skills and time. You've never been a young man with peak testosterone. I have. Trust me on this. I dated a girl once who had a stinky vagina. It just always had an odor. I was like a year younger than you at the time. I couldn't have cared less because I was in lust with her. I still went down on her. I still wanted her vagina all the time. Even IF he doesn't necessarily like your vagina (and I don't think that's the case), he likes you, thinks you're great, and therefore your vagina is great. And if he doesn't like you or think you're great, that's a different problem.
TL;DR: You're making too much of it. He made a bad joke. He very likely doesn't think your vag is gross. Men aren't sensitive to comments on their body the way women tend to be so we don't realize how our jokes are perceived. Make a joke back at him, something like “you like to eat pancakes, right?” and then have him go down on you and if he's enthusiastic about it, you know he likes your vag.