Call her out on her racist remarks. See how she responds. If she doesn’t apologize and say it was a joke then she’s probably just ignorant. Still racist, but sometimes people need to be called out.
Say “that’s incredibly racist” or something along those lines. Be honest about how you feel. “Do you truly feel that way?”
“I like you but I’m not sure I can be with someone who has racist beliefs”
If she goes into defense and isn’t apologetic she truly believes these things and isn’t just ignorant racist but racist racist.
If it’s “his baby” he needs to be a man and father it. It’s ultimatum time – you get to keep your job and he gets to watch his child or arrange care otherwise. Do not back down, do not let this man shame you and abuse you. His life and wants are not more important than yours. Honestly he’s being a shitty partner.
But she wasn’t. If he can’t trust her he shouldn’t be with her.
Call her out on her racist remarks. See how she responds. If she doesn’t apologize and say it was a joke then she’s probably just ignorant. Still racist, but sometimes people need to be called out.
Say “that’s incredibly racist” or something along those lines. Be honest about how you feel. “Do you truly feel that way?”
“I like you but I’m not sure I can be with someone who has racist beliefs”
If she goes into defense and isn’t apologetic she truly believes these things and isn’t just ignorant racist but racist racist.
If it’s “his baby” he needs to be a man and father it. It’s ultimatum time – you get to keep your job and he gets to watch his child or arrange care otherwise. Do not back down, do not let this man shame you and abuse you. His life and wants are not more important than yours. Honestly he’s being a shitty partner.