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Room for online sex video chat EmmersonRae1
Model from: us
Languages: en
Birth Date: 1998-08-24
Body Type: bodyTypeLarge
Ethnicity: ethnicityWhite
Hair color: hairColorOther
Eyes color: eyeColorBlue
Subculture: subcultureGlamour
Date: October 9, 2022
There is nothing to think here, your boyfriend is gay
Seems like your gf loves attention. She wants to be the center of it. She is friends with a guy who’s in love with her and wants you to tell him off ? In front of other guys? She wants to make you look like the jealous boyfriend IMO. She wants a reason to make you look bad to leave you most likely. Her actions are very strange to me!
>
Yes.
>I will admit I have serious self esteem/body issues.
So stick 100% to a good diet and exercise. Its harder to feel bad when you are doing everything right.
I don't think this will help in the long run. OP has difficulty saying no and you suggest a safe word that means no, this is like telling her if you have a hard time saying no then just sing it. Implying no for a person trained to never say no by an abuser is equally difficult (yes those slaps when you try to stop someone forcing themselves on you are all about training).
A better way to deal with this situation is to speak to her partner outside the bedroom and clarify that during an upset about a previous sexual assault sex is NOT wanted, welcome or available. If her partner can't get that sex after dwelling on an assault can be like re-living all previous assaults then OP might consider taking a break from the relationship or even decide to end it all together.
Who wants a partner to hate them because they have no compassion about the wrong time to ask for sex?
We all are composites of our experiences, genetics, and traumas. Having empathy for someone that you know has suffered something terrible, like sexual abuse, still only goes so far. They don’t enjoy a right to crap on your head because their lives have been disrupted. She is responsible for her conduct. You aren’t. She either owns her bullshit or you split. I have an ex wife for that very reason.
I agree with all the comments of your partners abusive behaviour. If you were looking at his situation from a place of compassion, which you are. Your ultimatum makes sense. You are attempting to salvage something, which I’m hoping at one point really brought you happiness.
If his job is sincerely the reason for his aggression then maybe his employment could provide some support? Does he have any work colleagues, friends or family that you could approach for support in initiating his need for therapy…
At the same time do you have any friends or family you could reach out too and make sure they hve your back during this time?
Sounds like he has an addiction towards it. I play video games but still spend time with my bf and vise versa. Tell him to get his shit straight or you leaving bc you told him before
You clearly don't know how to read above a 4th grad level (brother). I don't want an expensive wedding, but it's funny how you saw past my initial concern. You're white right?
Did anyone else immediately start hearing Bohemian Rhapsody playing?
I believe it’s possible but I’m not a good marker to go off of. It’s also what I’ve always wanted but, from my experience, men want the visual and not the reality. (They want to act like Gomez in group setting and we’re understandably expected to be Morticia). However, group leaves, they become bubba the couch potato and still want Morticia waiting on them.
Fact is, it’s few and far between. I’m not saying there’s anything wrong with bubba the couch potato (if that’s what’s desired) but the Gomez/Morticia dynamic requires work and intrinsically specific interests/passions. Go find your Gomez. Or Morticia. Whichever it is you’re looking for. But don’t fault the bubba in between.
The age gap is too much
I think you are in the right however your partner likely needs more help with her mental health issues. Plus fwiw I’m a good cook and love mixing the noodles with the sauce and baking it in the oven. You sound really caring and thoughtful and I hope your circumstances improve soon.
While in the conversation about what she is deliberately doing to ruin your relationship with your son, record it. Get an attorney and go from there.
Discuss everything and anything
Sure.
Discuss how two adults have a right to privacy too, while you're at it. And how they have a right to pursue feelings freely. To on-line without old bigots criticising and persecuting them.
Everyone around them who knew supported them.
Looks like they knew exactly what they were doing MOVING AWAY TOGETHER with that support and avoiding all the ones like you lot here!
If you want this to progress to anything positive, you need to tell her. It sounds like you have feelings for her and let's be real, what happens when you guys go on vacation with each other? You need to put a birthday down for a plane ticket. Or what about when you introduce to parents and your family is like HAPPY 24!!!
There is a SLIM chance that she may be understanding of how the lie avalanched to a few more dates but if I was in her position, i'd be pissed as hell after having sex with someone who lied to me about something as simple as an age.
He cheated on her lmao
He's not your boyfriend yet so block him and move on. You're not even in the same state.
Gain trust back by having real conversations with your bf. And not nasty, angry fights but rather calm, rational and RESPECTFUL conversations where you express yourself and listen to him as well.
You seem to be going to everyone except your bf about this, including hundreds of strangers on Reddit now. And yes, in the future it is none of your friends’ business, especially one who you knew had a crush on you. That was silly.
This is the stupidest shit I’ve read on the internet today. The fuck?
Whenever an OP front loads the story with all of the “wonderful, perfect, totally 1000% healthy” things about the relationship, I know it’s about to go down hill, fast.
Your husband is not your friend. Even his pals didn’t want to co-sign his bullshit. I hope you get all of your confidence back plus more and either set some serious boundaries or move on. Yuk.
That’s 100% on you. She was vulnerable and you ignored her for two days. She does deserve better.
You mean ex husband? I was with my partner for 18 years 18 years he was so close to some of my friends that if they were not drinking together I wouldn't give a shit…He would have never ever ever ever done that… if you walked in or overheard a conversation he would come to me and be like hey I heard you and Papa blah talking I don't even know if you would do that he would tell me to take her to the sex store…Did he buy anything for you from there? Did he say hey babe I was picking up some lingerie for you when I grabbed this for her because I overheard the conversation you guys are having … This is a garden of flags…
How old are you?
We considered ourselves in a relationship but we had never gone on a date
Have you met before? Do you go to the same school?
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I'd just sit them down and have a conversation with them then. There's never going to be a “good time” to tell them, they'll probably be upset for a while because in their minds their religion is the only “correct” way to on-line.
It took my family a few years after I stopped going to church to finally accept it, they still tried to invite me and gave me religious gifts for holidays for a bit. But now my parents accept my witchy self, my grandparents less so but they tolerate it lol.
He sounds like a great partner!
Maybe he learned some of that from having been a great friend first – you know? You might just be very lucky for having found him. Genuinely kind people tend to have tight and emotionally meaningful friendships.
o maybe that means he can be good 100% of the time, if we just put in the work.
You know that's not true, or you wouldn't be here. It's just not possible. I get that he's not 100% bad to you. The the part of him that is is very dangerous to you and your life.
Stop snooping.
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If he likes you, you'll know. If he doesn't like you, you'll be confused. He doesn't like you. You are waiting for him. Why do you have to wait for someone else to decide on what's next in your love life. Dump him and move on.
sounds like a teenager going through puberty. Drop the dickhead
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But it seems OP IS respectful and caring about it.
He cares about her health more than her weight, and yes. The two are linked.
If your SO saw you get fat AF and was concerned and you made that topic off limits you expect them to put up with your shit?
Hopefully not…
I think you handled it right when you told him it wasn’t working out for you. Stand your ground on that. You’re not being the bad guy. You’re simply ending a relationship with someone who isn’t compatible with you. Send him another message to remind him that you already ended this relationship, and wish him a good life, and then stop replying to his messages. You do not need his permission to end this relationship. Don’t let him draw you back into it by making you think you’re the bad guy. You are not.
THANK YOU
I’m so tired of seeing these “My predator partner and I started dating when I was 13 and they were 28. Why is everything going wrong?”
Yes. Politics are values.
If you are not exclusive, then condoms should be considered essential for STD prevention.
He may want rawdogging, but he hasn't earned it yet.
Wtf is raceplay?
What has he done to improve his issues?
For what?
Well said
Are you sure you’re both 28 and 29? This sounds like something teens would argue about, not people almost in their 30s.
And you’re both at fault.
ME ME ME ME!!!!!! That’s all I’m hearing dude.
I didn’t even know I was pregnant. U gotta calm down dude. I’m asking for advice because I feel like this is something that’s a life altering experience. It’s also 50% his child, and yeah I didn’t know about it until now but that doesn’t make it any less upsetting. Thanks.
does she like him? i don't think she does
She does.
If it something that you would like to be done I think it's reasonable to talk to her about it and find out what the issue is.
If its that she doesn't like doing it and that's a deal breaker for you I would reconsider the relationship
24 is really young….if you really don't agree on kids…then you should break up It's best you find people who fit you completely
I think you'll save some money having less guests at the wedding.
Don't you DARE apologise.
Where were your friends when she was chatting shit for hours? Oh, sat right there?
Feminism does support ALL women's choices, you are right.
Your 'friend' was abusive to you for hours and you snapped. It's like how when you bait and attack even a very well behaved and calm dog, it will snap and bite eventually (sorry for comparing you to a dog, I just mean that it's a completely natural reaction).
You should ask your other 'friends' why they felt her comments were acceptable enough that she didn't deserve you to snap at her. Why did they not step in, and why were you having to deal with her crap completely alone.
In a perfect world, your husband is right. Shouting at someone is never ideal. But it doesn't take the situation into account and we are rarely in a perfect world.
You can not be proud of your actions, but that doesn't mean that someone deserves an apology from you.
I'm so sorry you're dealing with this stress and I hope that you can make peace with it. I really do think you should talk to both your husband and your 'friends'.
It is if it's mutual!!
I’m shocked that most people either enjoy spending time with all of their family members or are so brutally honest with the relatives they don’t like spending time with.
Yah he says “I’m the shit” I don’t like it but he finds it endearing
Because masturbating to the thought of a girl you like is fucking disgusting. Have you done it?
Why is he trying to control your life first of all?
If you want 20 cats it doesn't matter! It's your life. Not his. I would not get too serious with this guy. He sounds ridiculous imo.
The part that makes it dependency as opposed to just emotional support, is her saying she’ll be suicidal if we’re not together
But that isn't actually what she said, it's just what you have chosen to interpret based on a single sentence she once said.
If you can't either agree or disagree on that without meticulously digging through your previous communication, then I don't think you even need to bother.
Her words have clearly triggered something in you, which you aren't willing to let go without some kind of “proof”. That's ok – after all, you know her best – but if that's the case, then what else is left here?
Honestly, you could not be further from truth. She was over the weekend i fed her took care of her and even went to the abortion appointment with her. I supported her and alleviated her pain. I told her not to blame herself and that noone is judging her. I told her that she wouldnt have to raise that child on her own and that i would be there for her. When she went back to her own house that is when i started to think these thoughts… and franky i am unsure , that is why i turned towards strangers and not her because i dont want her to feel bad.
No, she is actually codependent. I suggeste look up what codependent bonding is. She is actually has the role of the caretaker and this fulfills her
Broccoli, booze, and beans
People who are smart do not feel the need to denigrate their loved ones over their perception of the loved one’s intelligence. They understand that intelligence is a complex quality, not easily measured. A truly intelligent person would have seen that question as the trap it was and avoided answering it.
I thought she was watching people study for AP exams. I wondered why that was a thing. Im relieved to find out that isnt a thing.
Heavy petting zoo, amirite?
Yep actual adults laugh off things that aren't actually real issues and then continue to enjoy their partner instead of getting possessive and borderline abusive. Soooo desperate of them having their happy and healthy relationships
It isn’t your dad!! Your mom is out of line and not just nosey but unhealthily concerned about your performance in bed- she needs to develop some boundaries and respect the both of you. What the heck is that about? I can see the rest is all heavy handed joking, yea, even the paedo bit because it isn’t true, since you are definitely of age. Brush it all off but have a word with your mum and the jokesters.
Don't cheat. Break up.
Break up instead of cheating.
If you want to be an asshole cheater, why don't you just break up?
Oy.
I went to a christian middle school and we would go to play games with the elderly in a nursing home every other Friday as part of our P.E. They were really nice and some of them were hilarious. We played cards, set up “bowling” for them, and various other games. It was really fun.
Renting until your child is of school age isn't a horrible idea. School districts are really important and a lot can happen in the 5 years between birth and kindergarten.
You could buy a house, right now, in a good neighborhood, and in 5 years, it could be shit and you have to move before your son or daughter starts school.
Owning a home before having a child isn't as important as you think it is.
I wish I could be as dedicated to something as him
You could be
and he looks so beautiful and I want to wake up beside him and run my hands through his hair for hours and tell him how much I love him.
Have you ever been in a relationship? Because this sounds more like a bad rom com plot where a pair starts off being annoyed as hell with each other and ends up madly in love. Spoiler alert: That isn't how lasting relationships begin IRL
I honestly am not as interested in this stuff as everyone else as I see their ideas as too hopeful and unrealistic, but that isn’t what I came here to talk about.
If he is as passionate about these topics as you describe, why would HE have an interest in someone who thinks their ideas are too hopeful and unrealistic? No one wants to be with someone who craps on their dreams.
But I don’t really know how to show him it’s for real.
It's not for real. It's a crush. You dont even care about what he cares about.
I love this guy, I don’t want to let him go.
Weirdly possessive. The only thing that is yours to let go are your fantasies
Sorry if this seems harsh, but you are 25, not 15. If you are serious about trying to meet someone, dont play games or say irritating things just to get their attention. Talk to him, human being to human being, learn about each other and determine if there is enough commonality to try and form a relationship.
You don’t want to have kids with this man.
Bro, shoot your shot. You're young, you won't lose anything if she shuts you down. There are plenty of people to meet and make new friends if it all goes south.
But whatever you do, don't make her your girlfriend if she does reciprocate and leaves her boyfriend. That's a big red flag that she would also do it to you in the future.
Talking from experience.
But hey, if you can get something fun going on, enjoy it while it lasts. Just keep your heart at bay.
Is it really lack of confidence or is he just selfish? If it would be a confidence issue, he would have seen “hey, i was a great lover those two times! I must keep this up! I'm on the rught way!” And not fall back on the comfortable way that is less work fof him but still get him off. I guess when he use the confidence issue, you feel bad for him and reel back with your demands. But what is actually his problem? To small? Can't last long enough? Can't make you cum? How can he say “i don't want to put work in our sexual life because of confidence when it is actually the other way around?
And i always hate it when you complain, they change to make you shut up and then fall back. So you see that they are totally possible to do it, even know what you mean, but just to lazy to do it.
So do you want to spend your whole life in a relationship in which you are unsatisfied in bed?
Yes
No one who doesn’t support your relationship should be at your wedding. Your fiancé needs to know how you feel and he needs to talk to his daughters to make them understand why their mom is not welcome. If you don’t nip this in the bud now, your husband’s ex will be invited to every event you have for the rest of your life. How old are the girls? He needs to explain to them that inviting their mom is not appropriate and if he won’t then you may need to rethink the wedding. If the girls don’t understand and refuse to come then that’s on them because they’re not being reasonable.
FFS this is getting ridiculous right now. One grown ass woman that behaves like a child and another grown ass man that doesn't understand this behaviour isn't going to change. It has been YEARS.
NOTHING IS GOING TO CHANGE
First time into this topic, i'm just nervous about it. I'm not an extrovert person
I’m genuinely curious, since the way you worded it kind of hints otherwise – are you no longer monogamous?
“I genuinely do not care what my partner’s private sex life is like.” Does that include other people (both physically and emotionally) or just porn?
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Hello,
I can't believe I put myself in this situation, and I'm fully ready to admit these are things I should not have brought up. However I am still very depressed over whatever was said and I just want the opinions of you guys since it's very hard for me to talk about things with people irl.
So my boyfriend and I were talking about the past and he was talking about his exes. Then the conversation led to me asking him who is the prettiest girl she has been with (I know I shouldn't have), and he (kind of reluctantly) first mentioned one of his ex, and then another, and then another. When I asked if the remaining two are also prettier than me, he said no.
I did expect I'd hear someone above me, but it took me aback when he mentioned three girls ahead of me. I am far from being the prettiest girl he's been with, I don't even make the top three. I already am very very insecure, and to me this just confirmed the thought that I am ugly and all the people who have had called me pretty was just saying it to make me feel better about myself. Now I told him jokingly that I had to mourn it, and he was sad that I was visibly upset by this. I told him that I wasn't mad at him, but I couldn't hide how sad this made me.
Since then, he had been trying to make me feel better about it by saying that he is with me and not them, and that I am pretty and whatnot. He was disturbed by how much it bothered me and thought that he lost me after this, to which I told him he didn't. The next day I asked him to rate me and he rated me a seven out of ten. Obviously this made me feel even worse, because he rated the other girls an eight. He's also told me that when I put on eyeliner I look the best out of them all, and a bunch of other things to try and make me feel better.
I know I clearly have issues but I feel like this is always going to make me feel sad, and I don't know how to come to terms with it. I know looks aren't supposed to matter, but I can't really convince myself of it. I'm finding myself looking for ways to look better and I feel very depressed. My ex considered me a 8.5 and would consider me very pretty especially without makeup, and one time I posted in a rating subreddit when I got into a very insecure stage, and everyone said I am very pretty (I was surprised by the enthusiasm of some of them) and rated me above 8. Now it feels like everyone was exaggerating. How should I deal with this?
Yeah we don’t on-line together. We nearly moved in together back a few months ago but decided against it as my dogs haven’t taken to acclimating well with her son. I appreciate your reply, and I think I do know that I need to end it as naked as it may be.
Yeah, the cons are much more serious/dealbreakery than the pros are to me.
It’s been 10 years. I bet the girl you dated in high school isn’t even the same girl. You need to accept that you didn’t end up with her and focus on your own life. Unfollow her on social media. It’s holding your back. Honestly, at this point, pining over your ex is kind of pathetic.
If he already left once because “it'd just too sad” or whatever, then he probably won't stay for cancer
Same, it sounds like the husband knew ALL about the AF health problems and having HPV. Yet, years later, here they are. It's disrespect, no trust, no communication and everything else.
me neither, no idea why
i ask how and she says how i don’t make her breakfast in bed or run her bath water for her anymore. i conclude these things are trivial and she would probably still have issues with my effort even if i did these things.
> You have your answer, but you don't want to hear it. Maybe you did nice honeymoon stuff when you first got together but now… you don't do it anymore. And you tried to blow it off.
Brother, in real life a woman can tell when you drop the act and start acting like you don't need to make an effort anymore.
Do you want to be with this woman? Do you realize you have to prove it every day? You can't take someone for granted.
I've been married 20 years, and I learned after about 10 painful years that a good relationship doesn't just happen; you have to invest in it. Just like other parts of a life well lived, you have to put in the effort every day if you want anything to come back to you. Happy wife, happy life.
These things are not trivial. She gave you concrete examples. Whatever relationship you have, you're going to have to make the effort to have a happy home, or you won't!
youre sounding really insensitive to the problems I told you about. this isn't about incompatible views that are both equally valid. He committed a basic act of violence against me. Would you tell a woman who got bashed by her boyfriend that “yall have incompatible views, just move on?”. If you were a half decent person you would at least sound a bit more empathetic
So glad you drew a line here! Especially after reading some of your replies in the comments. Your life will be SO much better having left this controlling and frankly abusive relationship. Best of luck _^
I really don't think dating based on personality is comparable to the first two
The pressure is to bring out a dialog with him in order to try to get her honeymoon. She will not get that chance again and The pressure is necessary because he's giving her bs excuses about not going back to the original plan.
She deserves a real answer instead of what her husband is giving as an excuse. The only way to get that is to talk. If she stays firm is talking, they might find a solution that works with both. She should not have to sacrifice the honeymoon she wanted over bs excuses. If that's expected of her, she deserves the real reason. She already knows his excuse is bs.
We don't know it's a flirtation. It might be just that they both like Anime.
What do you mean, what do you do? ? It’s called journaling and A LOT of people do not. Hell, I don’t have a single female friend who doesn’t journal. What do you expect her to do? Give herself amnesia? Sheesh.
He’s like my best friend though.
He’s like my best friend though.
Girl, we’ve all heard the same thing ? typical creep
?Found the piano teacher ?
I’m just messing by the way.
It's for serious, tho, and you're welcome ❤️
Yeah agreed. It’s confusing that she replies within the hour whenever we text about other things but can never meet up or set a date herself.
“She’s been my whole world”
That’s a huge part of the problem. The red flags started with immediately hanging out 24/7 and then moving in with someone you barely knew. Then you made someone else your “whole world”. That’s a whole lot of red flags and toxicity there.
You’re an adult. You don’t make another adult your world. A healthy relationship is one part of your world. Along with friends, family, work, personal hobbies. Since it seems you’ve neglected all of that for a relationship, it’s no wonder you’re feeling the way you are.
Im sorry you’re going through this, but I hope you use this time to heal and build up YOUR life.
It usually doesn’t work out. It didn’t for me for sure.
When we got back together we didn’t fix the problems in the relationship that lead to the breakup the first time.
He still didn’t communicate and I was still insecure.
I was just a little older than you at the time. It all seemed so big and important at the time, but it was neither my longest nor my best relationship.
Best advice I ever got about relationships is not to focus only on the good times. Hell yeah things are awesome when there is nothing to worry about.
But the true test for a relationship is how they make you feel when things get hard. Do they make you feel loved when you are fighting? That is when you have found someone worth being with.