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naty19, 84 y.o.
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Date: October 9, 2022
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Sounds like you'd also benefit from individual counseling….but also couple's counseling.
Then one day I realized something, our life was kind of mimicking my own parents lives, high school sweethearts, same type personalities, all of it. Shortly after this realization we lost my father to a health problem, and my mother was lost. He had taken care of everything, most finances, all the big or hard life decisions, he had handled all of them so she didn't have to.
Did you ever bother addressing this epiphany with your wife? Tbh…. it really sounded like you both were quite codependent during a big part of your relationship. I mean, it's okay if one partner is responsible for finances etc…. but the other partner should ALWAYS be kept in the loop, very hot decisions should be made together.
If you had been upfront about why you suddenly thought that your wife should buy her car on her own, she might have not been hurt.
You should give a reason. Just say you're not compatible personality wise and you're not happy with how things are working out. And OP don't let him convince you he will change or to stay, just leave, it's over now.