Wait a minute I read this wrong…I thought she was cooking with the bra on but it was off…having her brothers see her in a bra is wrong but topless? Oh hell no!!!
But you can imagine people hooking up with someone they just met, know nothing of their level of crazy or even their std status? Tinder is gross imo. There are lots of very hot or not so very hot crazy women out there. You have no idea who these people are when you’re hooking up with them.
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That’s exactly what I was thinking. This is what I know in one month, I don’t want to know more. Also he apologises the next day and it has happened many times already on one behaviour or the other which obviously means he’s not sorry since he’s not fixing his behaviour. Thank you though! X
I would have no issue with the crossdressing and the toys. I could even excuse the posting a video live (v much understanding that other people would draw the line earlier). But sending pics to specific men is cheating, kink or no kink.
50!? At that age especially that's a helluva lot. I can't find 50 people that want to have a conversation with me lol. Imo she might be lying about all of that which is totally a red flag. Even if she's not, body count doesn't matter. Until it does. And at that point she has other issues that you probably don't want any part of. Help her if she'll let you. Sounds like abuse to me.
The guy is gaslighting you. You fell for him during the “lovebombing” stage and now you don't know who he really is… The guy that you met in the beginning doesn't exist, now you see real him.
He's destroying your self worth, in other words he's abusing you.
He thanks you for not being like his ex.. that's fucked up thong to do! He should change and not be himself instead! It's mind fuckering what he's doing to you.
What full of light even means? He's darker than a black hole!
He wants exactly what he is showing you. He sounds like my first husband to the letter. He wants this…. whatever he decides to give you, or not give you and when he decides. It's got nothing to do with you. You are barely important. It's all about him and his whim of the moment. Not gonna tell you to leave cause as you said you already know, but know this. THIS BEHAVIOUR WILL NOT CHANGE. Might lean in one direction or the other at times but it will. Not. Change .
Working very hot on relationships and not having enough sex is what you do when you have children,serious medical issues, or in the middle of a catastrophic life event. Not for when you are 24. You should never put up with violence. I’d say concentrate on finishing school , do not impregnate her, and concentrate on getting your own place and a steady job if you don’t already. I’ve had a steady marriage where I fell out of like quickly and then love and it’s soul crushing. It’s far better to be alone .
Real men don't have sex with women who are black out drunk. We put them to bed and we sleep on the couch. Get tested for SA and any drugs that may be left in your system. Dude sounds like a douche bag.
Honestly, it’s probably more about him than it is about you. There could have been a range of things that made him want stop, but i think that probably performance anxiety with it being the first time. Don’t think about it too much and keep everything else going if it’s ok.
Because you absolutely need the education to be a good social worker, we just undervalue and underpay that work because it doesn't make profits for billionaires.
If it was an amount with an interest rate that wouldn’t cripple me financially then I would’ve been open to helping, but this debt will grow at a breathtaking rate. Additionally, there are other factor to the relationship outside of just the money that make me feel this is the best choice.
excuse me, the woman was almost raped and everyone just brushed it off??? I can't believe I actually just read that.
all those “that's what she said” types of jokes might have been funny between coworkers that are also good friends, but NOT directed to a woman that was almost raped at an office function! how is that poor woman still working there?
Get this psycho out of your social circle if possible. I'd worry that, if this is what he thinks is funny, the things he might escalate to could be dangerous.
Exactly so. I'm 100% on team “no one lives for free” when it comes to contributing fairly when cohabitating with a partner, but there is no rent or mortgage to contribute towards here. If OP ends up paying market value rent, they should definitely get a lease agreement written up and OP shouldn't contribute a single cent or minute of time towards any future repairs, renovations or improvements no matter what, don't do anything that a landlord is supposed to be doing and fixing on his time, including any yardwork during summer, never do more than 50% of chores/cooking. If he wants to be a landlord that takes market value rent from his partner while intending to pocket the entire payment and thus making a profit, he also gets to have all the responsibilities that follow along with that title, no additional help should ever be given for free, it should only be given in return for a deduction in the rent payments. Maybe that's petty, but it would certainly not be unfair, that stuff is what the rent money is supposed to cover after all. Personally, I'd rather not move in as it currently stands, but then again, I'd never move in to someone else's home either, because it would never feel like my home.
Sounds like the modern day 'toxic feminism' where the woman retains all the benefits of being a woman while not dealing with any of the 'negatives' of equality.
If she wants you to pay for everything, she should be doing all the cooking and cleaning, plan to take care of the kids 100% and let you lead as the man of the house.
You feel like there is a complete lack of empathy because there is a complete lack of empathy. She wants all the benefits of a partner without giving anything herself, you can see what kind of life you're going to be living.
You aren't her fiance that she loves, you're a provider for all her wishes and desires, not even a human being.
Yeah, thank you!!! Unfortunately probably true. We moved in together even sooner than we got engaged. Thank you for the reality check.
Amazing comment!!! Please OP listen to this comment and set a good example for your daughter! You deserve better, she deserves better
Do it anyway. You're 33. Mom can't stop you.
Wait a minute I read this wrong…I thought she was cooking with the bra on but it was off…having her brothers see her in a bra is wrong but topless? Oh hell no!!!
It's nice to have something to wear to remind you of someones love, that's all.
You know nothing of children, as you say. So stay out of this?
It’s not ur fault bro if she cheated on u, she’s a piece of shit if she did. Talk to her first:
If she didn't want to have a baby with you, she shouldn't have been having sex with you.
Pregnancy is a common side effect of unprotected sex.
What are you doing with a 36 year old woman????
But you can imagine people hooking up with someone they just met, know nothing of their level of crazy or even their std status? Tinder is gross imo. There are lots of very hot or not so very hot crazy women out there. You have no idea who these people are when you’re hooking up with them.
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That’s exactly what I was thinking. This is what I know in one month, I don’t want to know more. Also he apologises the next day and it has happened many times already on one behaviour or the other which obviously means he’s not sorry since he’s not fixing his behaviour. Thank you though! X
I would have no issue with the crossdressing and the toys. I could even excuse the posting a video live (v much understanding that other people would draw the line earlier). But sending pics to specific men is cheating, kink or no kink.
50!? At that age especially that's a helluva lot. I can't find 50 people that want to have a conversation with me lol. Imo she might be lying about all of that which is totally a red flag. Even if she's not, body count doesn't matter. Until it does. And at that point she has other issues that you probably don't want any part of. Help her if she'll let you. Sounds like abuse to me.
Dump him
The guy is gaslighting you. You fell for him during the “lovebombing” stage and now you don't know who he really is… The guy that you met in the beginning doesn't exist, now you see real him.
He's destroying your self worth, in other words he's abusing you.
He thanks you for not being like his ex.. that's fucked up thong to do! He should change and not be himself instead! It's mind fuckering what he's doing to you.
What full of light even means? He's darker than a black hole!
“you have no right” thanks for the laugh. of course i’m going to be gentle until she displays she’s ready for something like that.
He wants exactly what he is showing you. He sounds like my first husband to the letter. He wants this…. whatever he decides to give you, or not give you and when he decides. It's got nothing to do with you. You are barely important. It's all about him and his whim of the moment. Not gonna tell you to leave cause as you said you already know, but know this. THIS BEHAVIOUR WILL NOT CHANGE. Might lean in one direction or the other at times but it will. Not. Change .
oh, troll. shoulda smelled it sooner.
Working very hot on relationships and not having enough sex is what you do when you have children,serious medical issues, or in the middle of a catastrophic life event. Not for when you are 24. You should never put up with violence. I’d say concentrate on finishing school , do not impregnate her, and concentrate on getting your own place and a steady job if you don’t already. I’ve had a steady marriage where I fell out of like quickly and then love and it’s soul crushing. It’s far better to be alone .
Oof!!! Iv been looking for holes in the story to see if it’s legit or not and you just might have found one lol
Real men don't have sex with women who are black out drunk. We put them to bed and we sleep on the couch. Get tested for SA and any drugs that may be left in your system. Dude sounds like a douche bag.
Hum… when you say LDR, was it from the same country? Or was it from different countries? Who moved to get closer to the other?
They probably like you because you put up with bullshit other women wouldn’t (like cheating).
Nope just give her what she wants. Why would it matter where the outfit comes from. Stop over thinking.
Honestly, it’s probably more about him than it is about you. There could have been a range of things that made him want stop, but i think that probably performance anxiety with it being the first time. Don’t think about it too much and keep everything else going if it’s ok.
Because you absolutely need the education to be a good social worker, we just undervalue and underpay that work because it doesn't make profits for billionaires.
If it was an amount with an interest rate that wouldn’t cripple me financially then I would’ve been open to helping, but this debt will grow at a breathtaking rate. Additionally, there are other factor to the relationship outside of just the money that make me feel this is the best choice.
This is the boring work that makes things work.
Excellent advice.
Yeah whatever great reason to call off an engagement. You're all a bunch of pussies. She didn't say no smoking inside lol
excuse me, the woman was almost raped and everyone just brushed it off??? I can't believe I actually just read that.
all those “that's what she said” types of jokes might have been funny between coworkers that are also good friends, but NOT directed to a woman that was almost raped at an office function! how is that poor woman still working there?
Get this psycho out of your social circle if possible. I'd worry that, if this is what he thinks is funny, the things he might escalate to could be dangerous.
Yea it is. Two meatballs and a hotdog. you're good to go
Bro I suggest no.
But if by some chance you want to give it a shot…move slow and tread lightly. Don't rush back into things. Bc things could change quickly. Good luck
You gave 7 reasons to believe she is really in to you. Nothing you wrote would suggest otherwise.
What grade is this fellow in?
Exactly so. I'm 100% on team “no one lives for free” when it comes to contributing fairly when cohabitating with a partner, but there is no rent or mortgage to contribute towards here. If OP ends up paying market value rent, they should definitely get a lease agreement written up and OP shouldn't contribute a single cent or minute of time towards any future repairs, renovations or improvements no matter what, don't do anything that a landlord is supposed to be doing and fixing on his time, including any yardwork during summer, never do more than 50% of chores/cooking. If he wants to be a landlord that takes market value rent from his partner while intending to pocket the entire payment and thus making a profit, he also gets to have all the responsibilities that follow along with that title, no additional help should ever be given for free, it should only be given in return for a deduction in the rent payments. Maybe that's petty, but it would certainly not be unfair, that stuff is what the rent money is supposed to cover after all. Personally, I'd rather not move in as it currently stands, but then again, I'd never move in to someone else's home either, because it would never feel like my home.
He needs to stop asking “why are women like this” and start asking himself “why do I keep ending up with women who treat me this way”.
Yes! both men and women need to do this, like stop the whole “all (insert sex) are trash” mindset
If it's not a resounding “hell yes!” on marriage, let her go be with someone that wants that too.
Bruh, gym subscriptions are some of the hardest things to cancel.
Have you all explored making a list of boy and girl names that you both like?
Sounds like the modern day 'toxic feminism' where the woman retains all the benefits of being a woman while not dealing with any of the 'negatives' of equality.
If she wants you to pay for everything, she should be doing all the cooking and cleaning, plan to take care of the kids 100% and let you lead as the man of the house.
You feel like there is a complete lack of empathy because there is a complete lack of empathy. She wants all the benefits of a partner without giving anything herself, you can see what kind of life you're going to be living.
You aren't her fiance that she loves, you're a provider for all her wishes and desires, not even a human being.