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LOVE ME HARDER , ♥ HARDER ♥ HARDER ♥
Date: November 24, 2022
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Alcoholics often can’t just stop. They also struggle to moderate their drinking.
That’s heartbreaking. Is there things you can do that won’t result in him assaulting you to get him to initiate a divorce?
Agreed. I will not marry him until the problem is resolved, and I really hope it can be resolved:/
Why are you threatening to tattle to your wife instead of taking care of those assholes yourself? You're a grown man.
Nobody’s better then me bro lol
Tell me you're in sixth grade without telling me you're in sixth grade.
Idk about you but buying someone something and expecting them to do exactly what you want in return seems pretty entitled to me.
Ungrateful? What, she owes him her body because he took her to a game?
I agree with you that there such a thing as lying by omission, I think the disagreement is about when it becomes necessary to disclose one’s genitals.
In my mind, Ella told him when it became clear that they were reaching “serious relationship” territory, as soon as they were discussing the real possibility of sleeping together. To me, she was honest and didn’t lie by omission. I bring up the part about non-typical vaginas because likewise, I wouldn’t expect someone to disclose to me that they may not be able to have traditional PIV sex from day 1, or at a certain day count (1 month, 2 month, etc), but rather when it became clear that the relationship was serious and there was going to be sex involved in the near or immediate future. Ella did that, as far as we know.
I remember, clearly, learning this in 2nd grade. People just like to be obtuse on purpose I suppose.
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Does he work?
Looks like she’s been having fun without you. 🙁
If you're not eating strawberries then don't buy them.
Paying half for the groceries should be easy. Either you both put equal amounts into a grocery account, or he pays you back immediately you come home with the receipt.
Leftovers should be portioned and put into the freezer, not the fridge. Or plans made for them – work lunch tomorrow, or reheated for dinner tromorrow night.
Do continue to plan meals but at the start of the week, and you can put a list on the fridge, you plan for the nights he is cooking. Choose simple meals that have ingredients that won't spoil quickly OR will absolutely get used when he cooks the dish as planned. It should be simple to plan three meals that he would cook during the week and its Tuesday its, say, steak with that asparagus, Thu stir-fry and Sat spaghetti bologonaise. Not everything has to be expensive strawberries.
I'd rather stick to avoiding arguments than open my mouth and poke into the hornet's nest, if you know what I mean.
Oh dear, by not daring to talk about the difficult questions you’re just letting things build up and resentment will breed.
This is very unhealthy.
anyone who wants to get married after four months and then the next day says he needs to reevaluate due to an abortion 7 years ago isn't exactly mentally stable. dont get to hung over this and let the trash take itself out
But if it weren’t for Camilla being a good friend, it doesn’t sound like it would have happened?
Thats my point, i just dont know how much more should i wait and keep my hopes up and let things work out, or just start to actively make her talk about it to get familiar with that.
I've made that mistake so many times.
I feel for you. It isn't your fault he's a piece of shit. Never trust words, only actions. If he was split from his wife, they'd be split. You deserve better. And don't listen to all the assholes out there. Mistakes happen. ?
Thanks for your comment! You are right, she’s being as compassionate as she can. We’ve talked about it at length and I’m trying the best I can to get over it.
Right but it shows that something more may be going on here. Perhaps you have a heightened fear now that you have a child and it is triggering some things from your past. So when you make baseless claims and he “defends them” he may just be trying to point out that you're looking too nude and it's coming across as defense. Honestly, you shouldn't be arguing for hours about whether some random unrelated person is a pedophile or not. Either one of you.
We was seeing eachother for a few years. I first started to see her when she was around 7 months pregnant
break up with her oh my god. not only is she actively verbally abusing you, she’s actively and maliciously putting you in harms way by instigating with strangers on “your (masculinity’s) behalf”. holy shit, the toxicity is palpable and i genuinely hope you’re able to see through any rose tinting the relationship may have/have had. you deserve someone who loves you for who you are, not the macho-testosterone-chugging gigachad your girlfriend wants to turn you into.
She sounds toxic AF. She needs therapy, not a boyfriend. It’s your life OP, but ask yourself if you want to waste any more of it on a person who puts you down like this.
i don't understand, thats basically what i said at the first was that they are not compatable. then we got into this discussion and you came at the end of the discussion… so here we are conjuring up more shit.
The effectiveness of reversal for vasectomy is 90-95% (vasovasotomy) and 65-70% (vasoepididymostomy). So yeah, be aware there is a small chance it'll be permanent.
In any case, what I was more trying to get at is maybe its not the best idea to marry someone who disregards boundaries like she does.
I mean this in the kindest way possible.
If you’re worried about being paid back, nickel and diming, etc then you can’t afford to be dating
In simple words.. she is only for recreational use.. don’t plan any future with her.
You chose your cheating pos father and his mistress over your mom. Good job.
It probably is not fair for me to expect him to wanna do stuff all the time when it does not lead to sex right?
This is the main point of it. It's kind of like teasing as foreplay: if there is no resolution, then teasing is just cruel because you know you will not give what you are actually teasing for. A good blowjob/handjob can be amazing but ONLY that for months without sex could make someone frustrated whereas I guess you see it as a long tease until the actual sex. That said, his reaction to it is pretty good: he is asking you to understand when he doesn't want to get a release himself but is offering to take care of you anyway.
So yes, as far as I see it, this is all normal. You should talk about what the both of you can do to make the waiting time more bearable and then once you have sex you'll be able to take a look at how compatible you are. But as far as I see, you are both concerned about making the other happy and satisfied and can communicate openly about the issue, which are both very good signs that you are going to be compatible.
Next time you are unsure, sit down and have a talk with him. These kinds of issues can and will come up, especially in a long term relationship and it's important you learn early how to deal with them together.
But yeah I know many men just never get tested even months after the procedure.
Yeah it's been 7 weeks… What do you actually even like about her?
Gross smells are a turn off for a lot of people. And instead of respect that, he’s gaslighting you to think you need a therapist because of it? No, just no. Just because he’s cool with it, doesn’t mean something is wrong with you if youre not like him. This makes me wonder, how does he approach conflict in general. Is this his style, criticize you when you don’t do what he wants?
Because in a HEALTHY relationship, each person’s feelings should be treated as just as important, not more than, not less than, but just as important. So one side shares their perspective, receives validation, then the other side shares and gets the same. After that, solutions that work for both are explored and then implemented. You want a partner and want to be a partner that looks for win/win solutions, not one who looks to win at the others expense, like your bf is doing.
Also see if your state had “alienation of affection ” laws… the men can be held financially responsible for breaking the marriage
What makes him a loser? It sounds like he is wanting to work on his future to improve his situation in life. One question is: is this just talk or is he taking action to get there? Another question is: do your timelines match up or is there a big gap between them?
You are free to move on if you’re not confident that he will be able to give you want. You need to listen to yourself here and be honest with yourself.
That is awful, so sorry it happened to you. If they had even sent apologies beforehand, it would still feel shitty, but not as bad. It's up to you if you want to remain friends with any of them. If any of them can truly prove they are sorry and willing to make it up to you (and follow through on this), then maybe they are worth keeping, but I think it will take a lot to do so. Don't you go out of your way to plan anything though, let them put in the effort.
Dump him, this is absolutely concerning and you are not safe with him nor associating with him.
Comprehension wasn't the issue here, i overlooked the fact that it was about a prior relationship. I thought it happend in a period of 3 weeks ago, he asked about it and tried to reassure her 2 weeks ago & only later she came clean and he wasn't okay with it while they were dating those 5 months. I can't help the fact i bounced once or twice on the head while i was young. & It wasn't really clear in that post, + the tl;dr was kinda unclear too.
She’s the one who made the rules to begin with.
and i need help from an outside perspective because i feel that i should end this relationship
Fucking Run, she's certifiable…
Half of the US does not have genital herpes and it is a big deal.
yeah it’s a big no & my fiancé told her she needed to cancel because it wasn’t okay or fair to us as his parents & now his cousin is telling me how much my future mil spent & how excited she is
And is your BF perfect? No. He needs to worship your body for the goddess you are.
Yep… he told me that it feels like I’m older than I actually am… and that ”I’m so much fun to talk to”…
I know this is a very frightening and upsetting situation. I've been where you are. You have all my sympathy.
The 'good' news, if you can call it that, is she is probably not in danger. These kinds of threats are almost always a manipulation tactic to gain sympathy and convince you to get back together.
That being said, it's important to call the emergency services for your area. For her safety, as if she does attempt then help will be on the way, and also to call her bluff if she doesn't mean it.
Basically, sending an ambulance is never the wrong call. She either is in danger of attempting, in which case they can do a lot more than you, or she isn't. And if she isn't, then you'll hopefully scare her off trying it again.
A. It wasn't ok for your family to control you or your sexuality as a child. It's called religious trauma. B. It's not ok for your bf to attempt to control you now. It might seem normal because of how you grew up. C. It is time to impower yourself, wear those dresses, but on fun makeup, pick up some hobbies. Read about powerful women being great. D. Seek counseling for religious trauma to help discern what was abuse vs. Good advice.
In addition to the rewards, credit cards offer better protection when it comes to fraud/unauthorized charges since they’re not directly linked to one of your bank accounts. Fraud on a credit card is theft of a creditor’s money, fraud on a debit card is theft of your money.
Still not a appropriate work place relationship, It’s against the law in some states if the boss engages in work place relationships like this with employe, He is in a high spot of power and can easily abuse it, I think your girlfriend is getting pressured in this work relationship even if she doesn’t realize it, you need to have her get clear boundaries if she continues to not do anything about this break up with her because there’s most likely something going on then, and make it clear that this isn’t a request, relationship require some sacrifice and if you’re partner is really really uncomfortable with something you should work on this problem, if you’re partner isn’t willing to do this when they are lying and hiding something makes it seem like they aren’t worth a partnership with
good grief this man has issues and there's a high chance he'll turn into an abuser or stalker later on
run
Your story is an example of why you can’t set nude limitations and then not follow through. You told him you didn’t want to wait around 6-8 years to get married and here you are at 6 years. You told him you wouldn’t wait longer than January to be engaged and here you are in April almost May. He says he will do anything to help you guys conceive but changing his eating and smoking habits are a nude pass for him? After all of that you are still hoping for a proposal? Then what? Wait another 5 years for a marriage because he wants it on his timeline or IVF is too expensive or (if you are in the US you are legally married anyway because of common law?) I’m not trying to be mean or anything but you need to take a good look at your relationship…is this really who you want to raise a kid with because your biological clock is ticking? Can you imagine him doing the same thing to your kid…we will sign up for baseball next season because this one wasn’t convenient for him…. Or no I won’t take her to her dance recital because you are being too pushy and controlling….. just….ugh
We have a lot of on-line mutual friends too
Respectfully, with love- come the fuck on, girl. Do not stay in a toxic mess for this. Don't drag this out for live! mutuals, please, you're better than this. He is the drama.
I want to know the answer to this too. I was 37 weeks pregnant at my sister-in-law's wedding. No normal person expects the bride and groom to rearrange all their plans based on one person, even if it is family.
Respectfully you should back off.
Dude if you have a child with her she’s probably gonna abuse it