0 views
alice-fox chat
Date: September 27, 2022
The ad code is not a valid HTML code.
Fix the ad code in the Theme options.
Fix the ad code in the Theme options.
PleasingMyPussyNow
The ad code is not a valid HTML code.
Fix the ad code in the Theme options.
Fix the ad code in the Theme options.
Read the entire thing, I don’t care anymore. And if you don’t read it, I’ll just summarize. This original comment poster treated OP like a child and told her to go to therapy and learn boundaries, boundaries good, treating OP like a child? Not good.
They also when on to say that OP’s boyfriend was probably mistaken and/or ignorant. So I tell them… OP’s boyfriend knows exactly what he’s doing wrong and he’s a nasty asshole, so original comment poster was like, “oh I didn’t know because the info wasn’t there before.” And keeps their original comment the same and doesn’t even change it in light of the inform that came out… and fought with me over that. Idk about you, but this guy took advantage of OP and this original comment poster person doesn’t even acknowledge it. So say what you will. I don’t care.
My wife and I had a dead bedroom for a few years due to her depression caused by SA, amongst other things.
During this time, she told me she wanted me to have s*x with her even if she didn't want to, I refused and said I would wait till she wanted to as well.
Our love life is now almost as good as when we were dating (early 20's now early 40's) so change is possible.
However, if during the barron time's she had made a statement like your girlfriend did, I think that would have broken me.
I can't give you any advice just want to share my story.
Well shit, now im curious … oh boy
You're so young and you probably don't want to hear that, but what's the rush? If you aren't getting married, you are still in the interview stage. Therefore it's not relevant. Just have fun and worry about that when you are sure you want to marry. Then it's an issue that you'd have to settle
She also said he's now started commenting on guys bodies, cuteness etc
Why are they unreasonable boundaries?
Let's talk about you for a second.
He just told you, black and white, when shit gets hard, he will bail.
Statistically, when women get sick or injured, men leave. He just told you that he will happily be part of that statistic.
What if you have a traumatic birth of your next kid and need to spend months in the hospital, the year after physically recovering. Who would take care of your kids? Would he actually be by your side supporting you through healing and recovery?
What if that next kid is a girl and the birth results in a loss of your fertility. Will he leave you for someone who can give him a son?
What if you got cancer and needed a year or more worth of treatment?
What if you were in a car accident and need to spend months getting surgeries and years after relearning how to walk or do basic movements?
I think you know the answer to all of these.
I think you also know where you'd be if he was as sick or injured.
Don't waste your life on a man who wouldn't return the favor.
This is what I was thinking. Is it possible that her BF took her out on a long day of dates, and by 6PM she was exhausted and ready to plop on the couch?
Thank you for taking the time to reply. It made me cry reading your post. I do wish he'd give me more time to build trust in him before putting me in this position.
Ask lots of questions about them. Like, “what’s the capital of Bulgaria?”
Crushes typically result from one of two things: problems in the current relationship or the normal (when your age) instinct to search for the perfect partner. If you’re sure it’s not the first one, then you have run into the great question that plagues mutual selection of partners: Do I follow this instinct (to continue searching) or reject it? There’s value in commitment… but there’s also value in having enough experience to be certain about your commitment. Allow yourself time to get the experience, and the certainty (and fading of crushes) will come with it. Good luck.
Wow. You are a genius, all I saw was blah, blah, blah.
Your coworker is not a nice person, and chances are she's only interested because you are unavailable. If you are unsure about your current relationship, then take a step back and consider that. But the coworker? Yeah, she needs to be blocked on everything. She's not your friend. She doesn't care about you or what happens to your life. She wants to have fun. Right now it appears that she thinks ruining your relationship would be fun. Does that sound like fun to you? Or something you would do to a friend?
If they initiated the break up, don’t let them play games with your head. I’d suggest ignoring the texts if they come in again.
I stopped reading here, at the second comment because this.
O_O
I personally wouldn't do it.
It's a nice fantasy and something that should stay a fantasy for most people.
This could easily lead to jealousy, hurt feelings, anger and escalate to one partner wanting to pressure for more.
u/Sebasss9, it looks like you're trying to post a throwaway submission. Your account is too young and/or your comment karma is too low.
The right way to do it is to create a brand new Reddit account that begins with ThrowRA.
Please create a new account that starts with ThrowRA in the username and try again. Please note that we will not make exceptions to this rule.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
Hello /u/FarOrganization8267,
Your post was removed for the following reason(s):
Your title did not include at least two ages/genders or was not formatted correctly
Posts must:
include details about the involved parties including ages, genders, and length of relationship, and
request advice in real situations involving two or more people
We are enforcing the two rules listed above by making all titles start with ages/genders in the following format:
[##X][##X], [## X][## X], or [##-X][##-X] where ## is the age and X is the gender (currently M, F, T, A, NB, FTM, MTF but more can be added). You can have more than two ages/genders listed, but you must have at least two at the beginning of your title. Here is an example:
[34NB][88-F] We are two people in an example post
Please resubmit with a corrected title.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
Red flags all around. Someone who has nothing to hide, won't hide their messages away when they're asked to show them. Now he's had ample opportunity to delete the evidence so even if he agrees at this point, it's too late. The trust is gone. Dump him and be done.
No clue, but boundaries definitely need to be set if you are uncomfortable.
Darned if I know if you made the right decision
Yes, he did. She isn't ready for a relationship if she has to being her friend over to talk over her. I think this chat lost their damn mind.
It was text, so there could be sarcasm, but it would be a first from her through text.
What does his sob story have to do w him cheating lmao
In my country, a (psycho) therapist can diagnose such things.
They just can't prescribe medications. (germany)
And if revealing a medical diagnosis is a crime, everyone that ever outed a trans person is a criminal.
At the most you mean?
Not saying it does. Just trying to give OP some perspective on why having a relationship with her isn’t exactly normal.
One is in his own car, one is in other people’s vehicles
No, he's not.
He can get off without porn. Porn and masturbation aren't affecting any other aspects of his life. He's not having his wife come fuck him at work. He's not jerking in that bathroom stall or on a zoom call.
He's jerking off once a day and taking care of a bodily function. He has a higher than average sex drive. That's it.
I can't sleep if I have to pee. Does that make mean I have a pee addiction?
No.
Unless the need to get iff causes undue distress and makes it into other aspects of his life it's does not come close to the clinical definition of addiction.
So another words he doesn’t want to go to a marriage counseling unless they agree with him?? His ego just knows no bounds!! He does not see you as an equal.
He’s not perfect. No one is. He is abusive and manipulative.
You’re not in a rough patch your marriage is over.
To put it plainly he doesn’t want you but he loves knowing you still want him.
Why are you putting the decisions in his hands? Just take back your life and file for divorce yourself.
Do you honestly enjoy being treated this way? Is this what you’re prepared to put up with?
Have some self respect.
Honestly, a few months from now, when you've been away from this toxic situation for a while, you'll look back and have no idea what you were thinking. It sounds literally like you've been brainwashed. There's a part of you that already knows this too or you wouldn't be on here looking for answers. Focus on becoming independent, maybe join a hiking club or something to get you in touch with other people, talk to a therapist and be nice to yourself.
She literally said “my husband said he wanted to separate finances”. Then says, “I went back to work since separately means health insurance…” You go on to say, her husband forced her to go to work to get health insurance. You don't see your own gap in logic? Then it's not worth going back and forth with you.
And this, boys and girls, is why you don't propose, marry, and pop out kids with somebody you barely know when you're barely grown.
He thinks men are more insistent on their decisions where as female minds are always changing including sexuality
Tell him that her avoidance of the issue is a clear sign that she's not actually comfortable with people complimenting her weight, and that as the older adult he needs to get a clue.
Herein lies the peril of marrying someone you don't really know. He may be invested enough in staying married to change his habits for you. But you're finally getting a real sense of his real persona and what he values. These are things you couldn't possibly know at a distance. So talk to him about it. Tell him that even though you two didn't communicate your expectations before marrying that you'd like to do that now. If you both can't do that you might try some marriage counseling. But mistakes were made here.
And you said this this when he said “see you 12/31?”
So he said, “ I’ll see you Dec 31, and you said, “hey, man, no. I think I’m heading home on the 29th?”
See, that’s not what you’ve said happened at all.
The last time you spoke, you left it at “See you 12/31.” You didn’t like that he was doing other recreational things on 12/30. Your feelings were hurt (he didn’t even invite you!), you got mad, and you left.
Soo…whatever else did or didn’t happen, you got mad & ditched your brother. Of course it hasn’t gone well.
Lol what an American Idiot
I mean even if it did help with cramps, being together for 2.5 years you'd have seen her use it before. Unless there's a dramatic change in her body.
So I’m confused. I like that you’re a guy cause you can add male perspective. The added point i haven’t mentioned is that we haven’t hung out in person yet. Despite constant chatter to do so. So we haven’t been able to have a real conversation. And i have held out this debate with myself because we haven’t hung out yet. All the talk of trust and whatnot could possibly change over time but my thing is that this girl he lives with feels like more than a friend. And while she’s never been the reason he can’t hang out (usually it’s because he gets drunk the night before and is hung over the next day.) since we only plan to hang out on Friday’s because we are both off that day. But that hasn’t happened yet. More often than not because he gets drunk on Thursday and sleeps in on Friday and then doesn’t hang out.
So I’m confused if i should just call it a wash and be wrong or should i talk to him about my suspicions because he insists they’re friends. Idk anything about her including her name. Which is why this all feels sus. But I want to give him the benefit of the doubt and at least have a friend
Texting someone you have already slept with is overstepping? I guess this is a generational difference.
I hope it's not to late before OP realizes her worth. It's not about if he will hurt you or potentially kill you but when. Get out now while you still have a chance. This is abusive behavior and will only escalate.
Honestly the age incongruity is the least red of all the flags. But you’re only asking about his age so I’ll stick with that. There’s already a significant age gap. I’ll assume you like older guys. If he was much older, then would you still want to date him? Do you have a problem with him being older or him being a liar?
Obviously in private you don’t need to keep up an act. Go about your routine and life.
But in front of family? I’d say at least try to be understanding about their feelings and supportive.
My FIL died last year and I was sad FOR my husband but didn’t particularly mourn the man himself. When people would ask how I’m doing I’d say “about as well as can be expected” or “the arrangements are keeping us busy.” It was true and not unkind.
My question is, why are you surprised? Did you really think he would just “decide” to match your nonexistent sex drive? Having no sex drive isn’t the norm. But he also mentioned lack of affection too. No one, man or woman will just assume the other loves them if they see no signs of it. He assumed you didn’t care and offering sex because he wanted to break up just showed him that you were capable of having sex but choose not to.
Please get some help. It sounds like you may be asexual but you also are clueless as to relationships which is even worse.
This is essentially sexual assault. That “can’t control himself” sounds like he should be in jail.
Leave him. You are the abused and he’s the abuser
When people are trying to show you who they are, believe them. This is the family you're marrying into. Its not IF they hurt you, its WHEN. Do you want to end up on a crime show after you get murdered?
Suggesting a procedure is just going to make her MORE self-conscious. Maybe try being actually supportive and say something like “I noticed you haven't been taking your bra off, are you feeling self-conscious? Is there anything I can do to help you feel more confident?”
I mean… using your own logic I’d say that if they grow bored of it, they’d just start a new chat under a different premise with the AI. Same as finding a new porn game. Or watching a different porno. If chat one was a blowjob fantasy, chat two is maybe bdsm.
Now, I do say this as someone who writes plenty of smut and who has a partner who has done the same. We routinely seduce each other with little smut scenarios and met each other through a writing forum (not dedicated to smut), so this just seems like a novel fun use of AI to me.
At the end of the day, I won’t be with someone who I trust so little. I don’t think a chat bot is inherently more “risky” than porn or internet access in general. I certainly don’t think it deserves to be seen as cheating any more than porn does. For people who find porn usage to be a dealbreaker, this would obviously fall under that umbrella and someone using it would be breaking boundaries. But by the definition of the word you can’t “cheat” with something that isn’t real.
Jumping to chatting with a real person WOULD be cheating, naturally, but it’s such a different scenario (with a person vs with a computer) that the person doing so would have to have a predilection for cheating in the first place (Aka they’d cheat regardless). Because otherwise the argument has to be that no one should ever engage with porn in any context because if they’d get off to the thought of another person, it’s a quick jump to actually have sex with someone else (an argument that does not hold water scientifically. Porn =/= unfaithfulness)
That's emotional abuse Hun. I think you should dump him and focus on school and other things. He has growing up to do.
FWIW, there’s something that happens with some people who are assaulted and they just disassociate from what happened and it becomes not a thing in their brain. It’s not that dissimilar from what she’s doing now. It would explain why she wasn’t worried, but also why she doesn’t explain. She’s locked that memory so deep she can’t recall it.
This is even more probable when you consider NO ONE has come forward to claim OP. Any presumably she didn’t recognize any of the people that 23 and me / ancestry is showing for her fathers side of the family. That means it’s not someone in the immediate circle.
Wouldn’t be surprised if it was a boss.
You might be ashamed and regret it now, but what really matters now is how you are going to proceed with these relationships.
I find this situation bit silly because this kind of reaction over snack is too much.
To avoid future instances of this maybe make like two separate boxes for her and for you and what ever snacks will be in the boxes are off limit. It snacks are out of the box it's free-for-all. My gf and I set this system up when we moved in together and it's working flawlessly.
Maybe it's due to living half a century and more, but I remained friends with several of my old boyfriends after my late-life second marriage. I don't know what the obsession is with ex's in your generation. It isn't mature to obsess over past loves of your SO. Get over it.
Wow you're the world's greatest psychologist.
You really though you and something with that, didn't you?
Not to put her in a bad light but, heap of mental issues and for over 2 years I'm there for her and helping her as best I can. The Last year she became very verbally abusive and I started to lose control of my emotions as I was worn down. She would egg me on to hit her she would tell me how pathetic I was and say how easy it would be to sleep with someone else and get over me…and much more But for the first 2 years it was nothing like that
Although that explanation would explain why the video was in “Recent”, you're right that the timestamp would still be the original date.
There’s obviously something going on that he doesn’t think is defensible, or else why delete messages?
Oh I forgot, he unlocked his phone in his pocket accidentally and sent a series of messages to her that didn’t make any sense and then even though they were clearly accidental, HE UNSENT THEM TO REMOVE THOSE ACCIDENTAL MESSAGES FROM HIS SIGHT!!
? OP does he think you’re that big of an idiot? This is very sad. He comes clean or you’re allowed to think the worst and act accordingly. You can’t be in a marriage where you’re left hanging like this. Fuck that.
That’s a lot…why not just go talk to the woman?
She may have white lied that she was joking to avoid any drama or distrust.
But I do think that the damage is done, and has been done for a long time.. I also dont think you would trust her whether she said she was joking or not.
Something is not balanced in your relationship. It sounds like she feels like shes being controlled. Monogamy and commitment isnt supposed to be about controlling someone else. It is about being so into somene else, you are willing to fight every temptation, for their sake..
It sounds to me like you are using this conversation as an excuse.
If its not a good relationship, by all means, break up. You arent required to stay in an unhappy, imbalanced relationship. Break it off amicably.
“Omne animal post coitum triste praeter gallum mulieremque”
Comment Rule 1: All comments must be on topic and focus on the OP, in good faith. Derailing arguments, fights, and moral whataboutism is not allowed. Advice given must be good, ethical advice. Remember, the goal is to help your fellow human.
“”Comment Rule 2:** Keep it civil. No insults, no threats of violence, no encouraging violence, no harassment, no trolling, no advertising other subs, no spam. You will be banned. All bans in this sub are permanent. You don't get a free pass.
Hoo boy… if thats the way you think then I feel like there is a fair bit of “find out” phase in your future.
He also suggested going to places other than that as well. They just aren't cities. Going to outdoor adventures are just as adventurous as going to a museum in a city. OP has been to Chicago before, is she not adventurous for going there again?
Perhaps he wants to go to the beach to relax and not have an adventure on his vacation? Not everyone wants to be “on guard” or pushing themselves all the time, some people just like going to the same beach house and relaxing. Doesn't also mean they won't ever go on an adventure. And walking around in a city is not exactly what I'd call an adventure either.
Silence only protects the predator!! Please speak up and warn everyone about him. Save innocent children from enduring what you had to. Your Mom is worried about stigma and is trying to blame you, a child, by comparing you to a drug addict! Ridiculous.