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Squirt every goal [2796 tokens remaining]
Date: November 24, 2022
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That behaviour is toxic and abusive. She rejects you when you have hope, and gives you hope when you give up. Of you stay in that cycle, you will only receive false hope and pain. You are broken up. There is a reason for that. There always will be. It's your life, and you should take back control of where you are chasing. She doesn't sound like she has good intentions towards you, so don't let her control you. Nothing you have done means you should be guilty. She no longer dictates what you are allowed to do. You write your rules now. Make it clear to her that due to your current relationship, which is, at most, friends, she has no say. And most importantly of all: do not believe any flirting. She will give you a cold shoulder the second she has you in her grasp again
Never said she couldn't get drunk in public.
But really you want to get drunk at a college party with a bunch of guys where you happen to go in a room with your guy bestfriend unbeknownstto you?
How do we know she's really a victim?
What if she gave consent?
What if she's lying to him?
We're all assuming here based on what OP said.
Give OP how you would handle it.
I told him how I would.
So, you’ve adopted 1 child he fathered, 2 more have surfaced, now he thinks there is another. All with strippers, correct? Just trying to organize it in my head. Did he never use protection? Lol
Any chance of others he needs to know about? I do commend him for taking responsibility now that he has learned of these children, but I could completely understand your frustration. Like how many more should you expect?
Deja vu
The fact you don't see the issue is a BIG part of the issue
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Sex is a strong component of any relationship. And if you have different needs, you’re gonna have a naked time working it out long-term you will feel exactly like you do now. You can work it out with her and try to compromise but I would say it’s easier to find somebody that has more of a libido style to yours. Frankly, you’re too young just sort of give up all of that now for a girl you’re probably not gonna marry.
Well, as you are dependent use your father as much as possible, they has used you before, she used you for gold digging, as you hadn't the money she tried with your father and he is a BIG BIG BIG AH. He cheated on you with your GF and now he is babytrapped. You are not friend of your ex you are just the half brother of her child, so if you have to open the door open, be kind. And no more, the happy family games for the AH and the Gold digger.
Hold on, let me grab a 500ml caffeine coffee to focus ??♂️
Get a hobby
Do you think you are overreacting? Do you genuinely feel afraid of him? Are you scared that he is going to hurt you?
?
Ugh no Just no
Get fucking therapy
When your gf expressed doubts about this friendship did you try to facilitate the dynamic by introducing them to each other, inviting your friend to hang out with your gf, having a chat with all of you about the situation, having group hangouts with all of your mutual friends to get the groups comfortable with each other etc?
If he shows up to your job or to your house you call the police. Don't let his threats work. Also tell someone you trust. Where are your friends?
You've said your piece and he keeps throwing it back on you. It sounds like he's got a good deal with you. You are the main breadwinner and are there when he is not. He doesn't contribute as much and expects you to fill in the gaps.
His 5 year old is needy and attention seeking because she needs attention. She deserves better than an unhappy babysitter and father who is working when he is supposed to have her.
You deserve better than to be ignored and guilt-tripped.
He says, “having sex is now up to her, it gives her more control so she doesn’t feel pressured.” That seemed to me like the rule was her choice.
If it came from him, it feels passive aggressive: “Fine, then, I’ll never ask you for sex.” If it came from his therapist, it’s pretty weird to tell your client to never ask his partner for what he wants.
Even if the rule was a mutual agreement that seemed like a good idea at the time, the result is the same: He never has the opportunity to turn her on.
Having a crush on someone is perfectly normal. So is having a crush on somebody at work. You're also coming off of an abusive relationship, and his good nature pretty much makes him sparkle in your eyes.
Myself and a lot of people are requesting that you seek therapy not so much for the Crush, unless it starts to push you into trying to destroy his relationship so you can have one with him, but to seek assistance in learning the signs of an abusive relationship, and how to repair yourself from the traumas of that abusive relationship.
You also mentioned other things that you do such as seeing people as 'missions' and that is also detrimental to you having healthy relationships, and you could use techniques you learned from therapy on how to avoid doing things like that.
What will actually break you? Leaving and being free to heal and get to a place where you can be your own person and not constantly at the mercy of others, or losing yourself to a relationship where you can’t even seek the most basic comfort without being screamed at?
It’ll hurt, but you’re already hurting, and it’ll hurt a lot longer if you stay.
Especially her having experience with baby 1 already that gives her a big leap over this guy.
But if he cared about her, he wouldn’t have made it a destination wedding at the same time as her graduation
OP you need to do some soul searching. People that stay with addicts usually have just as many problems as the addict, they become your way to hide your own issues
If you both have British passports, you're both equally British. End of discussion
You don't sound sexually incompatible. If everything else is wonderful that might not matter but at 18 you'd be crazy to settle for it.
One don't get any advice from this app my guy. Reddit's predominant demographic is just lefty genz kids who know nothing outside this echochamber, whistling the same opinion between themselves within a chamber. So for one don't mind the comments in here. Two imo I completely understand where you are coming from. Same thing happened with both my younger and elder sister. It's very important your wife or gf understand that crimes do happen, and more often than not to people are who are over-confident. Also I would suggest moving to a better neighborhood and pay more rent if need be, and work extra. Rather than staying in a bad one.
Cheers and like I said bro. Reddit is the last place you want advice from. Most of these people are chronically on-line.
This doesn't make any sense to me…if you have been together with him for 4 years then why are you listening to your mother? He should come first. He can pick up your share of the bills until you graduate and start making a living.
Well we don't know if she's lying, but she meant it to hurt you.
So yeah, don't bother watching her kids for her.
There is always hope, and you have to cling to it.
Please make sure she is getting amazing nutrition, if nothing else cannabis is great for maintaining an appetite during chemo so you can keep her strength up ❤️ love and light ❤️
Yeah I agree this is weird and sounds…idk, we need more information
Well I’ll tell you what, it’s a lie that 32 year old women aren’t looking for anything serious, so he sounds manipulative 🙂