I'm very sorry, but if he really wanted to be married to and have kids with you, he would already. The fact that he did not strongly suggests he does not, no matter what he is telling you.
He is 48 years old. He has already been married once, he knows how it's done. He already has a peri-pubescent child, so he know how that's done, too.
He knows that marriage and family are important to you, he knows that you've upended your life for him. Self-evidently, these things do not matter to him, or he would be taking concrete steps to get married, which he is not doing.
TL;DR: I'm very sorry, but the sunk cost fallacy applies here.
The last time OP was out with this group they ended up in a fight, too. This can be a dangerous relationship to have with coworkers.
I'm very sorry, but if he really wanted to be married to and have kids with you, he would already. The fact that he did not strongly suggests he does not, no matter what he is telling you.
He is 48 years old. He has already been married once, he knows how it's done. He already has a peri-pubescent child, so he know how that's done, too.
He knows that marriage and family are important to you, he knows that you've upended your life for him. Self-evidently, these things do not matter to him, or he would be taking concrete steps to get married, which he is not doing.
TL;DR: I'm very sorry, but the sunk cost fallacy applies here.