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Babsie/Babs –, 34 y.o.
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Online Live Sex Chat rooms Babsie/Babs –
Date: October 30, 2022
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My (28m) Wife (26f) yells at me
Ah, yes. You mean verbal abuse.
then gives me the silent treatment
Ah, yes. Emotional abuse.
How am I supposed to deal with this like a mature adult?
By getting out of your abusive marriage.
Do not do therapy/counseling with your abuser. It'll give her more ammo in fights.
That's… wow
I mean, I'm petty, so I would send him one last text saying something like “You pathetic cheating POS, you aren't mature enough to be in a committed monogamous relationship if you are so desperate for attention from women that you can't go a few days without having one to get you off. We're done and I hope you stay single forever cause that's all you deserve”. And then block him everywhere.
But that's just me.
Wow. May I suggest some therapy for you? I don't know anyone who hasnt had to readjust their life because of a divorce – downsizing, readjusting spending on a lower income, renting instead of owning, the whole gamut of changes occur after a divorce. And yet here you are feeling sorry for someone that apparently abused you because they're going to have to adjust their lifestyle?
Cowboy up, OP. You told her. She can sell and downsize until things are manageable. Like any other person would have to do.
Tell him to Shut the F up and keep whatever, he’s ruining the mood! ?
Retort with a ring and a compromise of once we're married.
I feel like if you're committing to someone enough to call them your wife/husband, then what's yours is theirs and what's theirs is yours. If you think you're going to break up or don't trust them then don't get married. Assets are likely to be divisable anyway when you're married, whether you like it or not
NO NO NO. No soy at all. It’s estrogenic. And high estrogen levels are very bad for the physical development of boys.
For example, the risk of of obesity in young boys is the influence excess body fat has on the hormonal balance of boys. Excess body fat is estrogenic.
High estrogen in young boys can result in them being shorter and having smaller genitals. No soy. Please don’t do that to him.
Meat, chicken, fish, whey protein, eggs and vegetables. A small amount of grain based carbs. That’s it.
He doesn't, anyone can not date anyone for any reason they like. What's disgusting is the sexism and misogyny in these comments from men who clearly see women as tainted, spoiled goods.
Sounds like she needs space. If you hope to heal that friendship you should give it some time before attempting to reconnect, and make sure that you respect reasonable boundaries moving forward. Some of those you have to make for yourself.
Friendships often sour when one party feels overwhelmed by the other person's needs or expectations. Even though you've done a lot for her, she doesn't have the energy to reciprocate the same level of dedication. It happens.
No, both starting clean slate, bygones and let go of toxic past.
Not trying to scam myself a forgiveness here, but yeah, we had a chat and she admitted that she had given up on the relationship a while ago and was as much of a coward as me and was afraid to break up
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i’ve dealt with sexual trauma in the past and have had sensitivity to physical touch but it’s so much worse now and i don’t know why. he’s not pressuring me to do anything but i guess i’m pressuring myself and feeling guilty that past issues are effecting him. bc of that pressure and guilt though, i feel like i don’t have the time to heal and really figure out what’s going on with myself. but i don’t know – im just not attracted to him anymore.
we’ve talked about finances and drinking many times but he doesn’t seem to think that he has a problem with either. i guess for him it’s not a problem but it is for me. we actually had a conversation about marriage recently and he was talking about proposing within the next few months which really threw me because i feel like it’s so clear to me that we’re not connecting the way we used to.
and immature in the sense that he uses not being in long term relationships before this as an excuse for when he does something that i don’t like. or running things by his parents/ “choosing” them over me when like ..you’re about to propose to me in three months? it feels like we’re kids dating. not knowing how much you need to have saved to start a life outside of your parents home.
If you weren't turned on you are incompatible. Take it for what it is. You are feeling valid emotions. It's ok to just say goodbye, it was a mistake. Don't make it a big todo, just resolve it and quick like.
You need to reevaluate your life choices. You have a long bumpy road ahead of you. You are a side piece. He hasn’t left his wife and the chances of him doing it now are small with the same chance of him being around for the child.
Do not lie and be upfront with your boyfriend. Get a DNA test if you keep the child. Remember secrets don’t stay hidden forever.
You are a mess.
That much, we certainly can agree on.
Who’s wounds—his or mine?
I'm curious if she might have a problem due to an arranged marriage by her family? If her family does this? It sounds like there are some problems due to her being able to commit and I'm not sure what else you can do on this bro. Sorry
Tell Luke, he should know. Ashley needs to mind her own business. Tell aunt too if you think it will help.
You seriously don’t know why someone twice your age, old enough to be your father, who is also interested in sleeping with you, would lie to you?
Ditch the loser. Don’t date people old enough to be your parents. It’s a simple, healthy rule.
Oh my god who gives a shit if she wants to sleep around
This lady is waving a giant red flag at you. Open your eyes.
Thanks a lot. I really think i needed to hear this!
This!
One text saying “Happy Birthday – hope you have a great day!”. If she wants to reply she will and maybe things will develop from there.
He sounds like an idiot anyway, before you told us about the scented lotion.
A mild dose of narcissism is healthy. It's in all of us, in a way.
Her comment sounds more like she wanted to look “better” in your eyes at that moment. Is there a possibility that someone said something that made her feel the need to make that comment after the dinner? Was the tone spiteful or just casual? Did she seem mad?
Plenty of info missing to be able to say anything meaningful. Perhaps you should ask her what she meant by that?
I have no intention of cheating, I have no contact with the ex. I could not on-line with myself if I hurt any of those people. Yes he does know that I saw him and chatted with him for quite a while, there were friends of ours there, other than what he said to me and my thoughts nothing inappropriate happened. Does he know what my thoughts are, no. I feel that even after 24 years of marriage I am entitled to thoughts and I’m guessing he has thoughts he doesn’t share with me either…and that’s ok!
You forgot that he made her block every man she was in contact with. The man has deep issues and he shouldn't even be dating a rock before he deals with them.
First thing, take the word winning out. Winning implies you see this as a competition somehow. You wouldn’t be the first to struggle with that, but you need to figure out why it’s such a big deal to you.
Do you feel like you have something to prove? Are you worried about how she’s going to view you? If so, maybe talk to her about that. Let her know that you worry she may think less of you. Stop suffering alone and be brave enough to own what’s really in your heart.
that is 100% not the prevailing opinion in the comments. there are some people saying how she’s likely going through a depressive episode, which is probably true. but i’m not finding any that really excuse what she’s doing. i’m sure there are some buried deep, but the comments are almost all condemning what she’s doing, letting op know things are likely over, and telling him to lawyer up. you would get a very similar response if their genders were flipped. you’re making up a reason to be angry at something which isn’t even the point of this post.
Still separate accounts and make a budget to demonstrate where the money is going
19M ADHD here, those are excuses, this has nothing to do with his ADHD
It’s still cheating and he knew what he was doing. Please leave him
For the safety of yourself and your child please leave him and if you can’t please don’t ever leave him alone with her ever again even for a few minutes. Rage like that will escalate, it’s a matter of when not if.
If you decide you want to work on the marriage I recommend individual therapy for both of you as well as marriage counseling. While this is happening it’s best for him to on-line elsewhere until you can safely come back together or move on to a divorce.
For the safety of yourself and your child please leave him and if you can’t please don’t ever leave him alone with her ever again even for a few minutes. Rage like that will escalate, it’s a matter of when not if.
If you decide you want to work on the marriage I recommend individual therapy for both of you as well as marriage counseling. While this is happening it’s best for him to on-line elsewhere until you can safely come back together or move on to a divorce.
Free Use is a kink that doesn’t require the partner to be into it. If anything the kink actively promotes the other party being indifferent to the act entirely.
Please dont lover your sister to death.
Yes he’s still in a relationship. I feel weird about it because of that so I’ve been trying to ignore it. Apart of me is also finding it naked to accept these feelings, not sure why. ?
No. It's between your parents, stay out of it. Your Dad may already know anyway.
ESH.
She’s not looking in as she passes, she’s physically opening the door and putting her head into the room
Excellent. There is a bit of that which is similar to what my therapist said
Call your therapist immediately! Let me put this in a little perspective for you. It was on the news near me that a man in possession of what your talking about on his computer got sentenced after being convicted of numerous felonies. The felonies were for the images found on his computer….he got 120 years. This is a crime. It is a heinous crime. Those children are innocent victims. Leave before police break down the door and report it to the police!! Knowing about it and doing nothing can make you complicit.
Do not throw away your life for this man. He’s a monster.
He does. They talk everyday. He works here. He visits his child often regardless of the distance.
Because it seems like she will do everything she can just to get him back and he's giving that attention to her.
I'm mad because despite the distance, she decided to call him, her still being in love with my SO is not a secret, and I'm angry because he doesn't see that she's just trying to get his attention and he obliged. I find it disrespectful towards me. The ex knows about me. If she's in crisis, go to a psychiatrist not an ex thousand miles away.
I mean, if he worries so much about her then go be with her and leave me alone.
Am I the wrong one here?
I’d like to give you advice from someone who has lost multiple loved ones to drug overdoses. So many drugs now are laced with fentanyl and that stuff is deadly. The way your girlfriend and the friend were nodding off could be indicative of a drug overdose. What really needs to happen in that case is to get them to a hospital. Do not run the risk of losing them.
Narcan will help reverse an opioid overdose. If you stay with your girlfriend and/or continue to have friends who do drugs even on occasion, I suggest you keep a Narcan kit handy and learn how to use it and how to spot the indications of drug overdose. If your girlfriend isn’t having an opioid overdose but is overdosing on something else, Narcan won’t help her, but it also won’t hurt her. I know you can get free Narcan kits through local and maybe National organizations and also at some Walgreens locations.
Finally, talk to her parents or another close loved one that is older and has influence. When my sister overdosed and died, we had no idea she was doing drugs. Had we known, we would have gotten her into rehabilitation immediately and done everything in our power to keep her safe. You have the power to help change the course of her life by getting people who have that influence involved. Even if doing it feels like a betrayal and she takes it as a betrayal, you may save her life by doing it. Had anyone in my sister’s friend circle told us this was going on, we would have been eternally grateful. Getting her help before it’s too late is a true act of love, although that can be nude to recognize when you’re young.
If your girlfriend won’t go to rehab, perhaps she can start therapy to explore why she might feel the need to use drugs. Any step in the right direction counts.
Be strong. You clearly care about your girlfriend to be seeking advice on-line
This is possessive and controlling. Run!
If you really want to say something, ask if he would be fine with you also sleeping with other people while he does. I'm sure he will then understand.