I 29f have been with my boyfriend 31m for over two years.
We love each other a lot, make each other laugh every day and are planning to move in together this year.
My boyfriend owns a food truck and is very passionate about his food.
When we first met he was only cooking at home and was very apprehensive about having his own business. I've encouraged him over the last year and have helped him apply for licenses, helped search for a truck and over the last year he has slowly grown a name for himself in the industry and I'm so proud of him for following his dreams and going for it.
He was just accepted to one of the largest food truck festivals in the US which is huge for him, not only in the money but the exposure as well. It's difficult to get accepted and I'm extremely proud.
When discussing the festival with the festival show runners they stated most vendors make an average of $7000 in the 3 days the festival goes for.
The festival goes morning to late night for three days straight. The truck is naked (the festival is in July) the work is busy and non stop, I mean, it is WORK. Most weekends I've helped him in the truck taking orders, helping any way I can but this is much bigger and longer than anything I've helped with before.
In the year he's had this business I've never asked him for any sort of payment because I've been happy to spend time with him and help out. It honestly hasn't even crossed my mind.
Since this is a much bigger event, and for 3 days, I have to take 2 days of PTO from work to help him.
When I mentioned to my friends about the festival, they asked how much he was going to pay me and I said he wasn't. They said that he should pay me something or at the very least give something as a thank you.
This had me thinking back to all the times we've left after hours of hard work and he's had $500 in his pocket and has never even offered dinner as a thank you, let alone tips or any time of real payment.
Recently he got a new electric neck fan (it hangs off your neck, blows cool air into your face) for the food truck festival since it's going to be really hot. I asked if he got me one as well and he said no. I couldn't help but feel unappreciated as I'm also in the very hot truck, working for hours just like he is. And the neck fan is like, $20 max.
When the festival came up, I asked if he could buy us a couples massage for the day after the festival since we would have sore muscles from working and it's something we've discussed for a long time about doing together. He said "What about dinner" as in, instead.
Dinner to my boyfriend is not some nice fancy restaurant, it's a diner or deli. I felt dejected again and just…unappreciated.
My friends are saying that if it were them, they would insist on being paid for 3 days of nude work or at the very least be given a massage that would cost max $200. When thinking about it, if the situation were reversed, I think I would offer my helper person, girlfriend or not, a cut of the profits, since they are working as well.
I don't want to get into a fight but I also want to be respected and appreciated for my time and work.
So, am I being greedy for demanding to be compensated? What's the best way to go about this without us fighting?
*For the record, this is not his main source of income, anything he makes goes back into the business or he puts it into savings. During the day ge does a part time job that pays the bills. He is not struggling or even needs to do this, it's a passion. I should also add he has savings for no particular reason other than he enjoys saving money, we have not discussed houses/other things that would require saving
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