My husband and I have been married just under a year (our first anniversary is this weekend). We have had an amazing relationship with zero red flags. When we found out I was pregnant we were so excited.
My husband went on a bachelor trip this weekend. We talked about strip clubs and I told him I would be hurt if he went, as I've been dealing with self image issues and have been feeling very hormonal and vulnerable in the first trimester. When he got to the bachelor party, his phone died and I wasn't able to get in touch with him for hours. To make sure he wasn't dead in a ditch, I checked his location. He was at a strip club.
I got in touch with him and told him I needed his to tell me everything that happened and that I felt extremely betrayed. He told me some of the other guys paid $1,000 an hour for a lap dance in a private room but that he didn't do that and didn't touch a stripper.
The next day, I decided to check our joint bank I decided to check our joint bank account. There was a $1000 charge. He admitted to going into a private room with a stripper but swore (on our unborn baby's life) that he had a realization that what he was doing was wrong and fled the room before anything happened. We had another long conversation, and I told him again that he needed to tell me EVERYTHING. I also told him that if he omitted anything and it came out later, I'd be done.
Later, I suggested that, if he didn't get the lap dance, we should call the club and ask for a refund because the services were not rendered. He told me that they would say the private dance happens because "they're out for money." I told him they could just pull the camera footage then, as most clubs have them. He then admitted, for the first time, that he actually did get the dance, which was topless and involved groping.
I am devastated and at a loss of how to handle this. I called his mom and told her what happened and that he wasn't welcome to stay at the house and needed to stay with her. I'm now home alone, pregnant, and unsure of what to do. Is this marriage salvageable?
TLDR; my husband cheated on me while pregnant, lied about it multiple times, and I'm not sure if the marriage is salvageable.
submitted by /u/trruutr
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