Hello Reddit,
I’ll get straight to the point, apologies in advance for the bad grammar as English is not my first language. For some background My(29F) and my boyfriend (32M) have been together for just a few months. So it’s safe to say we were still getting to know each other. I think I dodged a bullet.
Last night my cousin had a pool party to celebrate her birthday and she said I could invite my boyfriend, so I did, it would have been a good opportunity to meet my cousins (we are all women and very close). I let him know a week in advance that the party would start at 7 pm. And so, the day of the party comes (which was last night) and I remind him during the day that the party is at 7, but I will actually go at 8 because I didn’t want to spend that much time there and I wanted to leave early. He then tells me last minute that he could not make it to the party until 9 pm which I understand, he had a busy day, but 9 pm was too late to show up to the event. So I say to him: “That’s too late, at that point the event will be almost over… but no worries, I know you are busy, let’s meet up tomorrow! I’ll take you out for dinner”. He says “ok”.
I thought all is good and I go to the party at 8, had a great time and left early. The next day (which is today) I notice that he is acting somewhat distant. But I didn’t think much of it. I thought he was just busy as usual.
Then my cousin sent a screenshot on the group chat. She was swiping on bumble and she came across my boyfriend’s profile. She sent the screenshot and asked me to confirm if it was him. I say “yes that’s indeed him”. I honestly didn’t think much of it in the moment because it could just be an old profile that he forgot to disable when we started our relationship. I did disable all of my dating apps to prevent any misunderstandings when we made things official.
Today I text him and I ask him what is he doing on bumble. I was genuinely expecting him to tell me it was an old profile he forgot to disable. BUT NOPE. He called me to explain and my heart sank when he told me the following:
“Last night I was angry at you because you went to that party without me, all my friends were telling me that you deliberately disinvited me. I got drunk and Angry so I reactivated my bumble profile, I didn’t talk to anyone though”.
Wait… WHAT?! I immediately told him I didn’t want to talk to him anymore and hang up the phone. I thought about it for a few minutes, and honestly, I will not stand for this disrespect. I don’t care if he didn’t chat with anybody; HE betrayed my trust. He showed me that he’s gonna go talk to other girls and possibly cheat whenever he gets mad at me Instead of actually communicating how he feels! If not, then why did he re-activated the profile?! How immature is this?!
I had no idea his feelings were hurt in the first place, he never said anything and just went straight to bumble. And the entire ordeal wasn’t even my fault, he could not make it at the time of the event! Or am I wrong?
I sent him a voice note telling him that I will not let him treat me like this. I don’t trust him anymore And I wanted to end the relationship. To me, he did not deserve a call. I then block him on everything. And if he has responded to my voice note then I have no idea what his response was. I’m not interested in knowing either.
If his willing to that over a minor misunderstanding, who knows what he’ll do if we have an bigger disagreement?! Huge red flag.
What would you do in my place?
submitted by /u/Murky-Scallion-727
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