My wife (36F) wants me (37M) to make “reparations”

My wife and I have been at odds. We've been married for 1.5 years, together for 3ish. We have been fighting on most days, which, in my perspective, usually ends with me supplicating even when I disagree, making apologies and trying to go along with her.

She called me willful, which made my brain hurt, because I feel that I am constantly bending over backwards to please her, agree with her, try to help other people like her, smooth out relationships for her, etc.

Today, she then stated that she didn't realize how much a past fight was affecting her. She said that I wronged her badly and that she can not let go of it until I make "serious and timely reparations."

I don't like this as a model for a relationship. I believe in kindness, compassion, and forgiveness. She believes that I "must feel pain, because pain will teach me the lesson."

So I guess … What sorts of things can a man do to show appropriate penance and move forward?

Edit – Additional Context:

Today, she was mad that I gave the baby the wrong milk at the midnight feeding.

Yesterday she was mad because our neighbor is an idiot, and I'm starving the baby, and she said she was hungry but I didn't feed her.

For a little more context, my wife was ill and my mother was in town to take care of the baby. My mother had asked me to leave my dog with her (we have 2, I usually take one on my business trips to lighten the load at home) because she would watch them both and the baby. My wife was mad because we had talked about me taking the dog and I violated that agreement.

She doesn't think my mother was helpful enough and my grandmother apparently called my wife to tell her that she thought my mother was being very giving and that my wife should be doing more.

I think this was probably aggressive from my grandmother, who didn't have much perspective. I called my grandmother to try and figure out what was going on, she apologized to me for causing drama and said she would not be involving herself any longer. My wife wanted Grandma to call and apologize to her, but that didn't happen.

Edit 2: I appreciate everyone taking the time to give me some perspective. It sounds like I have more to do than get over it by self flagellation or baking an apology cake.

Edit 3: I really appreciate everyone giving their time to read and reply to my post.