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Date: November 24, 2022
How do you think telling them will help her? It might reduce your burden but could it help her? Could it hurt her instead because she'd be losing trust in you and they may react poorly?
I had a suicidal friend and got some help by getting advice from a suicide hotline and doing some therapy sessions. Maybe you could try that? That would help determine if you should share.
Let her know you love her. Let her know you're here for her. Let her know how much you would love it if she lived nearby so you could be closer (pressure free).
Ask her – straight up- if she has a plan in place and if she's going to take her life. If so, ask if she has a plan. Ask her to promise not to follow through. Tell her you want her in your life and your life would be negatively changed forever if she followed through. Really tell her how it would affect you and the family. Specifically say that you do not want her to kill herself, that you want her alive.
Research local-to-her hotlines and crisis resources. Make her enter them in her phone (you can even have her send you a screenshot) and have her promise to call them if she ever thinks she will follow through.
This topic cannot be taboo between you. Keep asking about it very directly when you can. This makes it more real. She is suddenly accountable to you. She might be able to acknowledge that there would be an impact. And when she's at her worst, she just might remember that she has a brother she promised she'd on-line for.
Most importantly, remember that you are not responsible. You can't prevent it, only she can. If she follows through, it is not your fault. I repeat, it is not your fault.
Just be honest and tell her that you want out , give her an agreed upon amount of time to find a place or go back home, and call it a day
Dang, that's not a very good partner thing for her to do. She should try to be supportive, not spiteful.
Maybe take her wanting a few days away as a chance to reflect on how much she actually enriches your life – just making sure you're both supporting each other and she's not a “fairweather partner” – a partner that's only a good partner when things are good.
I don't know how to tell you this… But if he's been dodging the IRS and his debts for years, he's probably also been antisocial in your relationship.