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Cuminwithoreos, 24 y.o.
Location: Earth but elsewhere
Room subject: POV sloppy deepthroat [1354 tokens left]
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Date: January 15, 2023
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How are you going to accept his apologies when he kills you?
You do know that asphyxiation kills people, right? He is not magically going to become a calm person. Honestly, this is just going to get even worse for you if you stick around.
This man is a violent person, his violence is escalating, and he will kill you. His violence is not your fault. His violence is not because you are a “nag” or a “bitch” or “you don't suppprt him enough” or any other bs excuse – it's his own responsibility. Move on while you are still able – as a LIVING person – to remember that you had a good initial year together. And please be careful about how you leave him.
This is all really insightful. Good way to look at things. I don't have a lot of needs or wants to feel fulfilled or happy and I very much enjoy other people being happy. There's definitely more I could do for myself, I'll do a big think and see where I come out on the other side.
Boundaries are definitely the first order of business too!!
Correction, you have spoken to unknown strangers over the phone. Anyone can pretend to be anyone. Of course most don't, but some are so evil in their intent, you can't even imagine. Nothing is ever real until it's based in reality and you aren't with someone until you have seen them.
I’ve ended it and I’m really sad. He reacted to my message even after I asked him to not reply back.
15 maybe. But still weird.
Maybe you should just start doing a better job cleaning down there? W boyfriend.
He says he’s been holding it in this entire time. One major change that happened recently was that he became a stay at home dad for almost a year. So that hit his ego. So maybe now he’s trying to “get it back” by pointing out all of the things that I do that are “too masculine” for him. I don’t know.
Seems to me that a wedding date is more optional than a graduation. You don't set that date, but his bride set the date for their wedding.
So they are the selfish ones here.
You have a once in a lifetime opportunity to go to your graduation. That is yours. A wedding is an important event, but it seems to me they have already excluded you. Pretty rotten thing to do in my opinion. How did that come about?
I think you definitely should be able to talk to someone about this to help sort through your feelings. However, I do think it’s probably best if who that is is not your parents/someone who she’s explicitly asked not to or whose good opinion she needs.
You deserve emotional support for sure, and people underestimate the effect abortions have on men even when they’re pro choice and don’t yet want to be parents. It’s not something that’s good to repress or suck it up for. I’ve seen it affect guys for years after. Though the physical burden is on her and the most prominent effects are, that doesn’t mean it’s totally her problem and that shouldn’t be dismissed (that said, you shouldn’t dismiss the effects of the pill she has to take – it’s still a big deal).
At the same time, your parents are people she has to deal with as long as you’re together. If they have judgment or changed opinions, that will affect her and their dynamic from here on out. And as adults, your parents have more implicit power in that dynamic.
I suggest finding friends you can trust, a therapist/counselor, someone completely on the outside, whoever, if possible. If there is truly no one else, then have a vulnerable conversation with her about why you need it. But recognize that you telling your parents probably affects her much more negatively than telling her friends affects her.
I will say, one of the guys I know did not tell his parents until a couple decades later and he probably would have had a much easier time with a lot of things if he had (as well as a better relationship with them). But in his case, I don’t think he really confided in anyone else, either, and that’s the bigger issue.
The level of rage in arguments is the real issue here. Punches the car? One day that’s going to be you.
I agree. Wish that was somehow possible to transfer.
you guys are grown adults.. why are you using snapchat in the first place ??
I would give it never if he spoke to me like that
Yes he does, the reasons for our plans to move were a mutual decision and are mutually beneficial. The location of the job has nothing to do with his decision. Regardless, his decision is not the concern here and despite not taking the offer, we still plan to make the move.
You need to respect her need for space. People can change their minds. People can initially be really into someone and then discover they aren't actually ready to date, or don't see potential with that particular person, or any number of valid reasons. She really doesn't owe you further explanation. Getting angry at her, as if she is somehow obligated to continue dating you, is incredibly unhealthy. It sucks that she didn't tell you sooner but that doesn't change your reality. Arguing about it is fruitless and only confirming to her that she needs to work on herself before diving into a relationship.
And keep in mind that you don't really know her. It's not even personal at this point. Rejection is part of the dating process.