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Date: October 13, 2022
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Self Respect! We all go through these type of situations. Now, either your going to choose you or your going to choose her.
He is trying to.ease his guilt by making you out to be the bad guy. You were the smart guy till you went back with him.
Why are you stopping with this one particular act? She could theoretically turn around and accuse you of assault for any sexual act you two partake in. You might as well get a contract that covers all your sexual activities. Not the type of relationship I’d subscribe to personally.
So far new toys hasn't made a difference, and we've tried a couple rings but he didn't like the way they felt. I didn't think to mention that when I made my post, sorry. Bit frazzled
Even just, “Well… THAT was uncomfortable!”, would be so hilarious IMO.
But yeah, I get you. And it’s easy to talk when not in the moment. Some of us just say stupid shit all the time anyway and it works out once in a while :p.
If you're not happy then leave. He's a grown adult, he should be paying his own bills.
I don't understand why he keeps talking to them. If none of these women have custody, there is zero reason for contact. Sure, if he has ex flings he wants to make sure he doesn't have other kids with, I can see one phone call, but that is it. The fact that there is ongoing contact is a HUGE red flag here. And I sure as hell would have a problem if my husband came trying to sex me up after talking to his ex sex buddy! Being responsible for his kids is not equal to talking to the Moms if they aren't responsible for the kids, seems like he is crossing lines.
He's introduced his 23 year old girlfriend to his kids after a couple of months and is already talking 2 parent household and marriage. That's the opposite of good parenting.
And yeah he took on the responsibility of raising his kids when their mom bailed. They're his kids. It's he to be applauded for not dropping them off at the pound?
But you don’t have feelings for those friends. You haven’t told Bob the most important aspect of this. He wouldn’t be comfortable if he knew you were more than friends.
Uh? You said flirting. When is a smile flirting? Didn't accuse you btw. Just disagreed with what you said
Respond with “you owe me respect”.
Vasectomies are reversible.
Its a difficult one i feel like its not my place to say
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Maybe because he knew you had been up a couple of times with the baby already that night and wanted to leave you sleep? I think you may be overreacting somewhat to an isolated situation?
Thank you this is something I needed to hear.
Has he completely forgotten what the clitoris is or?
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He managed to let workmate/affair partner know you were onto them while managing to make you look/think you were crazy.
Text or call him
Stop.
Tell him he needs to talk to his doctor and take care of it because you can't on-line with the constant gas. If he doesn't, and if he keeps telling you you're overreacting? Bye. Talk about dismissive.
I think the larger question is whether you want this baby yourself. Obviously that's entirely your choice, but I wouldn't tell him unless you're sure that it's 100% going to happen.
After that, I personally would tell him (not that I'd ever be in your position, I'm a guy) and say that you're fine with him not being involved if that's the path he choses
I have only skimmed this and YIKES YIKES YIKES. Couples and individual therapy or just individual to help you get out of this relationship. He is a pig.
please just get the dog proper care, that isn’t fair to keep the dog inside a crate all the time that’s abuse and neglect. dogs are like family and should be able to get attention and exercise. break up with your shitty boyfriend asap
The next person who made mention of it, I'd just say “I have a strict no-dating policy with coworkers.”
Agreed. I had my family young and for a long time I was enthusiastically on board with more. But when I switched, it was a nude switch. There came a point where a new baby wouldn't just slot into the life we had anymore, it would be a hot turn backwards and start again, and I knew I just couldn't do it.
then don‘t choose a friend??
Like I said before I had descovered that recently he never told me
Update
The fact that he argues in defense of having mold in his room is appalling.
You have as many pets as you want!! The only thing leaving should be him! My husband was allergic to cats and we have 5 because he KNOWS how much I love them and that makes him happy!!! Take out the trash and tell your kitties I love them!!!
Rather sounds like he “forgot” initially that he thinks its completely absurd to view watching porn as equal to cheating (I'd completely agree with this standpoint) and tell his wife exactly that. (and on-line with the consequences)
That doesn't answer my question
If you just trust each other that much already then it’s over
Wouldn't be an issue for me if he was single at the time.
Well first you need to mention the loan to her. Second…stop caving and ordering food. You are 30 you can say no. Cook at home and if she insists on take out..she can order and pay for it. Personally I think she's using you for some easy money/food but who knows.
i’m sorry you’re in this situation. it sounds like you’re not okay with your gf’s friends checking her out. i think it’s fair to tell her you’re uncomfortable, and if you simply can’t stand this happening, you’re welcome to set a boundary. but ultimately it’s up to her who she associates with, so you’d have to accept that if you made her choose between you and them, she might pick them.
what about this do you think makes you uncomfortable? do you sense she’s uncomfortable? do you worry her friends might have bad intentions? do you worry she might cheat? i think it’s worth reflecting on this question.
Suggest that your GF get in touch with some of her wiccan contacts to help her through this. They've likely had to deal with similar situations and can help her get some perspective. This guy sounds like someone who shouldn't be allowed in public. No one likes a person who does this kind of stuff and claims it's “just a joke,” no matter what the topic is.
Sorry, typo she was 34
Can you imagine the emotional repercussions of being made to feel like a bad partner for not desiring sex after a doctor cut out one of your sexual organs? If he lost a testicle would everyone here be telling him to nut up or shut up? Come on you cannot be this dense. He values his want to be desired over her emotional well being if he thinks he can make this her problem to solve after she already promised to have sex with him whenever he wanted.
College isn't for everyone but if they don't have a plan??? Run. I'm being serious.
There are trade schools. They're are A LOT of alternative education models for people who don't want to go to college.
If the person you think you love doesn't have a plan??? Guess what their plan is???? You completely subsidizing their life while they accomplish nothing.
In other words, plan for yourself. Don't assume the person you are with will have any plans. That's just the truth.
You've got this. Honestly i know being with someone for a long time makes us have blinders on. And we fall into a well i don't want to waste all those years together so i want to make it work-mindset. Wasting years on a relationship isn't a prize to do so for longer especially after a breach of trust this big.
You are young again not to sound like a boomer lol. But you are a strong wonderful young woman. Alot of woman wouldn't have even posted this or even deleted it already. Or simply been too afraid of judgement themselves to adress it.
Please know you deserve to be in a relationship you feel safe in. My ex used to cry and threatened suicide because he cldnt on-line with what he did.. and i fell for it every time. Wow if he has that strong a reaction he must love me. I must be making a mistake..
Please don't fall into that trap. Your feelings and concerns are valid and never let anyone tell u otherwise. I say fuck them if they do!
Try. I know it's tough bt try speaking to someone u trust. Someone u knw would always give it to u real bt loves u. ❤️ gather a support system. Don't feel ashamed. You did nothing wrong. Nothing at all.
If u need to message me do so. You aren't alone!
I got an idea and it is fucking crazy…why don't you, and let me finish before you nix this idea, why dont you talk to your partner about what is going on with you..That way you can have and open and honest relationship with your partner and perhaps find a way to make everyone happy without you eventually cheating. Cuz that is what you are going to do eventually.
In this moment, right now, you are the best dad ever. You showed up for her when it mattered, did your dad thing, and knocked it out of the park. We are all on this earth to learn, especially from ourselves and experiences. My mom had me young and messed up a lot, but every day she is learning from her mistakes to be a better mom for me and I see that. Let go of those feelings of guilt and focus on going forward. Because you are a great dad.
I mean… idk about the comments here, but I would not be happy if my husband pretended to hit me like that. He could have made his point by smacking his own hand, but getting suddenly close to you and raising his hand to the point that you’re afraid of him crossed the line imo.
It’s not clear from your post if he ever apologized, but if you were scared and he just brushed it off, then yes, I would be concerned about this.
He's punishing you for asking him to do stuff/help out, and making it stressful/harder for you to ask him to do stuff.
Some girls and women have this really toxic way of supporting each other that involves tearing down anyone that causes each other problems. As a woman myself, I really hate it and think it is extremely unhealthy, but they probably think they are being helpful and supportive to you.