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SQUIRT LIKE FOUNTAIN, ✨ [547 tokens remaining]
Date: October 26, 2022
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Yeah I’m confused just reading this. You are two people, you each get 50% family time. You need to split your half into 25/25 to be fair.
I hope you are doing better. I know you are his wife but at some point you can’t allow yourself to drown with him. You have been trying to help him and he isn’t responsive. It’s going to take him going deeper in a spiral before he learns what he did, unfortunately.
I would suggest making one more ultimatum stating your plans on a divorce. If he doesn’t change, leave him. I honestly believe you need to leave if it continues like this. You aren’t required to drown with him
Your dad is a boomer lol you know what your gf would like way more than him
Yikes… that’s a lot to unpack, honestly. Definitely tell him. No way can you look him in the eye and tell him that you love him and there’s no issues when you’ve been having an affair for 9 months. That’s a LONG time
If you decide to leave your boyfriend that should be final decision don't do “im sorry that was a mistake i miss you” type shit that aint fair for your boyfriend… Good luck
What are you doing in this phone you dumb bitch?
Are you sure you want kids with this guy?
Find your purpose and improve yourself. If you knew you'd be too busy to ask
Oh, so like full on grooming vibes.
Weird how some people will look at teenagers and go “I wanna fuck that”.
Couldn't be me.
Tell her she's got 48 hours to tell him or you will. Follow up with him in 48 hours to confirm.
I’m sorry this happened, sounds like he took advantage of you and kept stringing you along. You’re better off without him, this is not at all how people in relationships treat each other.
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She was cheating for a while. Move on.
This sounds even more exhausting to me, frankly. If you have to play these kinds of games with your partner, that's not a healthy dynamic.
4 years is brutal. 5 years is worse. At least you don’t have children which means you could never extricate yourself.
My wife is incredibly smart, funny, honest, and caring. However she has anger management issues, holds lasting grudges, suffers from generalised anxiety disorder, and can be very sensitive (i.e. takes a lot of offense to things things most people just brush off in their day to day life).
How have these issues made themselves present in your life together, before all this happened with the wedding?
so maybe you dodged a bullet?
i'd say so! i've been with someone like this. it's exhausting.
Sounds like a pretty standard silly argument. I'm sure it will blow over.
I’m sure it’s sucks very much to be told that… but you claim to underhand where he’s coming from so what do you intent do to? It’s fine to be happy with your weight as is if that’s your prerogative, but then where do y’all go from here.
This is just her substituting one addiction for another. She’s now addicted to the rush of a new fling/romance/affair.
What’s more interesting is her therapist saying she’s “entitled to her privacy”.
She’s either not telling her therapist why she needs this “privacy”, in which case the therapy isn’t going to work anyway, or the therapist is fucking shit encouraging your wife to cheat.
Your marriage is very rocky right now and may not survive this as your wife seems to be treating rehab as a little holiday away from her real life and doesn’t seem serious about it.
F his feelings, he's homo- and transphobic what the actual hell! “If you're into women I'll become one” that's not how this works, not how anything works. He was “ok” with you being bi because it ment you'd still be with him. Now he won't allow you to break up with him! You don't want to hurt his feelings… what about yours? If he loved you, he'd want you to be happy, not miserable but still with him. He's a selfish little fuck.
Medium city, an hour away… a suburb? An incorporated town? A vacant family farm? Hardly middle of nowhere. You're being overdramatic.
You are both so young. Yes, you love her. But think about what a committed relationship needs. Is she gonna buy you diapers when you are 92? Why commit yourself at 18 years old to someone who cheats on you?
We like to say, “she's guano,” in mixed company though.
@OP this pattern of her exaggerated responses indicates she does not have as much control in her life as she thinks she should. This indicates less polarity in your masculine to her feminine.
In my experience (and certainly backed up by one of my favorite books, “The Way of the Superior Man” by David Daeda) you've probably given in to her a few too many times so she expects you to have no boundaries.
Had she communicated this was an emergency and not just a request, might you have responsibilities dedicated differently?
You're not sleeping with her brother. Hopefully she isn't either. Her brother getting to work is HIS OWN responsibility. And you'd be a better 'brother-not-quite-in-law” to mentor him and get him to take responsibility himself. Since it's BOTH of them depending on you, perhaps you're either a pushover or their whole family is a mess.
What do you want in your life? Champions to share your quests with or NPC Followers?
this is why you dont help people cheat. cheaters are bad people.
JFC. He is a ducking predator. Stop seeing him immediately. Normal forty year old men don't chase literal teenagers for relationships. Women his own age don't want him because he is SHIT.
Sending you a blow kiss
He’s a physician
Maybe even try in the shower? Then he can rinse his mouth if he needs without it being obvious
Don't feel bad about it, he might just be getting used to it. I'm sure he's not always smelling like daisies either. I saw your other comments about going for a check up which I think is a good idea, BV can cause odor and is an easy fix
You should’ve used the 9k to get out of this situation.
When's your graduation? I'm 50/50 between the UK and NY and if I'm around I'll show up.
Update; I left him. He sent me screenshots of texts between him and the girl and when I got mad he claimed he didn’t do anything. I told him I was pissed and it Doesn’t matter because it’s only going to end up with the same shit. He told me “okay then sTfU about it.” And then I proceeded to block him.
Your gf is apparently a r/relationship_advice mod.
As for your other problem, it seems your gf is just not that interested in sex. She may be asexual or just very religious or something. It doesn’t matter. You’re both young and if this relationship no longer fulfills your expectations, it is reasonable to try to break up on good terms.
You were testing her, and maybe just maybe she eas doing the same to you. relationships are not games, this is why it doesn't work
She already told you she wanted more communication from you and you responded by ghosting her for 7 days. How on earth did you think that was the best response if you were interested in seeing her again?
It sounds like you're only posting this to validate your emotions, not get objective advice. In which case you already made your mind up, so why the hell are you even here. If nothing can change your perception of this situation, then just act on it already. No point trying to get support on reddit, why not just go break up with her if thats the answer you're already looking for?
Why did you take a break?
Wait what ?
You need to join Al Anon and exit this abusive relationship.
Doesn't sound like she feels the same way about you. Sorry dude.
Sorry I meant grad school. Either way. If he’s not working then he’s poor. I’m just saying to have a heart.
Hello all!
Thank you for responding to my post, unfortunately Reddit is not letting me look at all the comments so I’m unable to respond ?
You're tying all these issues to the fact that your boyfriend happens to be into gaming and not, say, carpenting, but the fact is that his behaviour and your expectations have nothing to do with his specific hobby at all.
Some of your issues have to do with him just being plain disrespectful to you, e.g. trying and failing to multi-task when you're on the phone, and others have to do with you not understanding that if he has agreed to game with a friend on a specific day, he has made an actual social commitment to that friend that is just as valid as if he has arranged to meet up for coffee with them.
You need to separate your feelings from your boyfriend's specific hobby and address them with him for what they actually are. It's not your boyfriend's affinity for gaming that makes him dismiss you when you're on the phone, for example; it's just bad manners and a lack of respect.
Yeah, 2 months in is the honeymoon stage. This is as good as it is going to get. Don't bother fighting for something that is never going to be what you hope it will be. Just break it off and move on.
I think their question was more why, not how. Where are the friends cards at? Lost as well?
It sucks, but like, what can you do? Do you work in admin at any of the places she is applying to? I doubt it would be helpful even if you did. All you can do is support her emotionally as she gets the rejections and let her know that being accepted to these programs isn't why you're with her.
Maybe talk to her about how you can support her during this time, does she want time alone to process the rejections, or would she appreciate if you are able to spend the night (if you don't on-line together) and cuddle while she is sad, overall just letting her know she can lean on you.
Yes, it maybe time to find another partner.
Dude. Your mental health matters, and your adult fully functioning partner- should understand your mental health issues. Anxiety is quite literally the worst feeling on this planet and you deserve someone who will help you feel like you will get through it. Not how much worse it will be down the line, when “she needs you” as if she is helping or supporting you to the level she expects??? because personally- just reading that, as a person with anxiety. GIVES ME anxiety… there is no way you deserve that, or need to deal with it. And as a female I’ll tell you, there is someone out there who will be your person. And they will never berate you. I wish you luck and I hope you give yourself a break and let this relationship go.
Bruh.
A woman letting a dude snort coke off her tits in no way implies she was in a coke fuelled ORGY. You've taken one thought you don't like and taken it a further step ahead to make it sound even worse.
That comment already tells me how you feel about people who do drugs, especially women who might be prospective partners.
You know how shit like that actually happens, right? It's not like people meet up for a hook-up and start talking about all the weird shit they do. I mean, some people who are sexually open like that, but not everyone goes there. Sometimes they're in the moment and if they had been bonding that night over sharing some drugs on a night out and then decided to hook up, the question can be as simple as “hey, have you ever had someone take a line off your tits before?” and depending on if its a yes or no, or if it sounds interesting in that moment, they go ahead or not.
Not all of this stuff is a kink or stuff that is planned far ahead. It's usually a “shoot your shot” situation, and like I said, people like to experience things.
If people experiencing life in a way that is different from how you believe people should on-line life, even if they choose later that that life is not for them is enough to make you deeply insecure and see them as a depraved sex beast who's willing to get in orgies and do anything with anyone…
Like I said, you're not cut out for dating a city girl, lmao. People go to cities for opportunities, whether that's education, jobs, or experiences. The way people talk about cities is that its always going at all hours, and you can meet people from anywhere, and also the freaks, outcasts, and creatives, depending on where you hang out.
I'm not saying you'll never find a person who outright decided they don't like drugs and will never take drugs in a city, but judging everyone based on what they've done (past) not just what they're doing (present) will alienate you and make you very lonely.
We
What he did was wrong, and it was probably a lot of emotions running high and trying to avoid losing his kid through emotional manipulation (also not great). The right thing for him to do is hire a lawyer and minimize his contact with the ex- not text her that he loves her.
I have a bit of empathy for the guy/dad/your ex- but highly recommend you see your way out of this situation. All this belongs in court, not in your inbox.
^ this.
My advice is to go ahead with the pregnancy if it is what you want. It is your body and your emotional well-being that will pay the price one way or the other.
As for him, he may come around. At this particular juncture, he's seeing it not only as being tethered forever to someone who has recently hurt him, but as that same person asking him to be there for him. His knee jerk reaction is a bit understandable even if it isn't what I would do. I'd like to think most folks in our age bracket would have a flash of anger, probably say some not nice things and (depending on how both of you feel on the topic of abortion) suggest ending the pregnancy, and then knuckle down and do what needs to be done.
But not everyone reacts to stressful situations the same.
LOL, enjoy getting banned from this sub.
Oh sweetie, I feel badly for you. Be on the lookout for PPD/PPA, and take care of yourself in the meantime.
It's hot being stuck in the mom role for years and years. I'm in a similar boat, and I can empathize.
I wish you and the little ones well. I hope you can find peace in a few years, even if it's as a single mom.
You can either ..sit her down .. and tell her how u feel .. and she must listen 2 u .. or maybe take some time apart ? She will have 2 do those things if your not there .. .. your both so young .. and a Good relationship has balance in it xx
This might/probably will sound harsh but imagine if you're type is guy who wears suits, has long hair, full beard and stays in good shape.
So when you are dating you look and are attracted to guys who are your type, you find somone who is your type, marry him then after he decides to get a full buzz cut, shave his beard, wear cargo shorts and get a full dad bod.
Would you honestly still be attracted to him?
You're husband being more attracted to somone e who is his type shouldn't really come as a suprise.
I'm not waiting and yes, I have been getting counselling. I know there's no coming back. I feel so guilty and terrible for the wobble and lashing out, but we can't change the past.
Not this one again
What does he say when you point out the unequal work load?
This is giving fwb relationship.
Object permanence, executive dysfunction, and anxious depressive traits are all common with adhd- she needs a diagnosis and a treatment plan. But also, she sounds comfortably lazy in this relationship. I’m not one for ultimatums but I do think you need to lay down that you can no longer on-line like this.
I write everything that needs to be done that week on a whiteboard on my fridge and cross it off as I go throughout the week… It feels good to cross it off.