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ALL GOALS MET [Multi Goal]
Date: October 10, 2022
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PleasingMyPussyNow
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Fair. Lol
When you put it like that, I feel even worse now tbh
When someone shows you who they are, believe them. He showed you. What kind of idiot videotapes himself getting a blowjob??! I'm so, so sorry this is happening to you, but consider yourself lucky you found out so soon before you wasted your life with him.
Oh my god what the hell? He is insulting and disrespecting you. He is doing this on purpose and it’s about power dynamics and control, he wants to diminish your worth so that you feel lucky to be with him. I wonder how he’d react if you talked about a really super nude sexy guy that you liked and how you would have dated him instead of you’d met him before your bf. There is a double standard going on here he feels he can say whatever he wants and you really can’t let him do that because it will get worse. “The most beautiful girl he’s ever seen” is insulting to you. Have self respect and tell him he crossed a line. But more than that think carefully about this guys intentions is he just a tactless moron or is he trying to put you in a position where you’re on your toes and grateful for his attention. Sounds abusive to me because there’s no need to say the things he said
Eww. Everything sounds gross. I'd be turned off for the next 10 years until he'd evolved into a toilet-flusher.
You can love someone and realize they are not right for you. He's been clear on his feelings. He wants to on-line in the moment, no commitment. If that isn't what you want, then find another guy who wants what you want. There are billions of men out there.
Lol straight up
How old are you both? What’s the distance? How many times have you met?
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It’s, “easier said than done” only for people who don’t respect themselves and their relationship. If my partner broke rules and agreements, cheated on me and then repeatedly lied to me about that including accusing other people of rape there’s only one option where I’m not wasting my life with someone.
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Different people feel differently about things like this—I’m way more like your girlfriend. Take her on a date night to get out of the house.
This is rape.
I'd forward them all the texts and let them take care of the piece of trash for themselves.
Right in all these walls of text the only thing she ever done wrong is slam a door a few years ago, that usually leads to your partner wanting divorce. Sounds like both are train wrecks honestly.
Thanks for not parsing your words. Both my parents were cheaters and I never imagined myself to be one too. I don’t want to be that person. You gave me kick in the butt for sure. Hoping I can use it well.
Sure. But the act of revealing something about yourself that’s scary and vulnerable is the same.
You need better friend who aren’t afraid of communication. As you get older, letting go of people like these make your life better.
He needs to get a court ordered paternity test for this to end, sorry. Either she needs to file with the court or he does. If he files he will be on the hook for child support, and I would expect the court's not to allow him sign his rights away–just because your friend had it happen doesn't mean it's likely. It's insanely hot. Also keep in mind your state laws may have vastly different laws than where she lives. If he does decide to file for paternity, then he needs to hire a lawyer in the state she lives in, not where you on-line currently.
But he's 29, she's 22, most likely she was 21 when this happened and he was 28… I don't know what he would expect from hooking up with a girl that young. Sorry but when you have unprotected sex you risk the chance of pregnancy, a 28/29 year old should know that. I feel zero sympathy for your boyfriend because he really should have known better. I don't want to assume she lied about the pill, because I got knocked up while being on the pill. It happens.
Also just because abortions are available doesn't mean she should have gotten one–there is a huge emotional toll that goes with it. Not everyone women can go through with it, and just because you did, doesn't mean this could mean woman could. Part of being pro-choice is respecting a woman's decision to keep the baby.
It's not how all men think, he's using that as an excuse to be an asshole.
We figured out my wife is asexual a while into our marriage… You need a perspective shift. “Once in a while, not too often” is something much more akin to once a year than once a week. I'll say it for someone with experience who is is stuck in a relationship with an asexual partner… Run. Now. For the good of both of you.
Thank you for letting me know about that, i asked him what he gave me because i was so scared it could have affected my seizures it was the “pink Pussycat pill”
The lotion should be the least of your problems. The way this guy treats you, he should be kicked to the curb yesterday.
He didn’t attack you consciously, so that means he didn’t attack you. Work out how to avoid this happening again and support him if he wants to try therapy to help him recover from his trauma.
You need psychotherapy. Your'e asking the internet what to do when you already possess all of the information and insight necessary to make a decision. That suggests some kind of psych issue.
“Sometimes it will be a random 'you two should make out' or a 'what if you kissed'. It’s just, so off putting. He isn’t the type I would say is creepy”
Why not? He's behaving in a deeply creepy manner. Once is maybe excusable, but he's not taking no for an answer. That's very creepy.
“he had opened up to her about how he had a wet dream with the three of us…”
Gross. Y'all are young, and our sexual culture sucks, so maybe he doesn't know any better; if you want, I think you could give him the opportunity to behave better after you tell him the repeated sexual comments about you are creepy and he needs to stop. If he won't stop, don't spend time with him; someone who won't stop doing things you dislike once you tell him isn't your friend.
You might also want to consider seeing a counselor. It sounds like you're not voicing your preferences or boundaries, and a counselor might be able to work on that with you. Good luck.
I'd leave. He didn't fix his problems, he found a different crutch, and now he's getting fanatic about it. No good will come of this.
much cheaper than therapy
I wouldn't even give him an opportunity to explain to be honest. Because he's already shown he downplays what happened, makes excuses and doesn't take responsibility, he will likely only try to manipulate you into staying.
As a previous victim of DV, I have already played this sort of scenario with a new partner in my head over and over and have simply told myself it isn't worth the risk. DV is very high stakes for your life, there's plenty of people out there who would never harm their partner under any circumstances.
I had so much fun with you last night, please come and drink with me again. Kind of like that.
You can't help people like her, they like the drama they like this kind of stuff. They are damaged and as long as they don't help themselves nothing will change.
He insists that I’m the problem and that I talk about how I am feeling too often. But I can’t help but think that the issue is that he doesn’t have capacity for emotional connection. I have even tried couples therapy but we only had a few sessions before he said he didn’t want to pay. It does make me question how much love and respect is coming from his side
Oh, it’s even worse! He lied to the friends and said that he and Op agreed to be in a porn free relationship… that’s what that whole “shame on you” from the friend was about.
Op needs to get rid of this loser. He’s just a giant, walking red flag.
I hate to point out the obvious, but you're 12 years younger than him and he got with you when you were barely old enough to drink. I think it's pretty obvious that he likes much younger women, but it sounds like you're alluding that he's looking at girls way younger than you. ?????????????
If this is what she calls rude I'd hate to see what she calls evil
He's so selfish he almost got you killed and you're wondering if you should say something.
All I read here is a lot of me,me,me. I don’t see why she has to shoulder more bills than you, you admit to only paying 1,500 w/savings out of your 1,950 salary. Meanwhile she is paying pretty much her entire check. How is that even? Or even close? Plus she is in school and cleans. All you keep saying is you miss things she used to do your YOU. Why is she paying for ALL the groceries but your lifestyle yet increases that bill? And she’s the gold digger for asking for grocery money? Jesus dood. She’s also suffering from two Auto-Immune diseases and school and you can’t be bothered to cook dinner ? I honestly hope she realizes what her future looks like before it’s too late.
Can you see yourself being happy if the current situation continues forever? I.E. he drinks heavily and you don't meet his family? Some people would be ok with this, and some people would not. You just have to decide which you are. Expecting people to change significantly doesn't usually pay off (especially regarding addiction and family culture).
That's my neutral response.
And here's my biased response. This guy reminds me of a roommate from college. He had a lot of pressure from his family to marry within their religion. And to do it in a pretty traditional way: rapidly committing and marrying before even moving in together. But as a sort of compromise, their moral code allowed (or even encouraged) him to have casual sex as long as it was with a taboo outsider, who would not become his wife. And so he had a series of exploitative relationships with women outside his religion before marrying within it. He wasn't even a believer; just responding to cultural pressure.
AND SHE STILL HAS NOT TOLD YOU. Her FRIEND came to you and told you. Me thinks the situation has changed.
You’re in your bounds to say you’re uncomfortable to her buuut she’s also in her bounds to dump you for being jealous over platonic affection. I think you’d be better off addressing those issues within yourself instead of projecting them onto her perfectly normal behavior.
They weren’t together “together”. Not was she Faithful either. They were actually together just for the green card.
Yes I know it’s a different sub, but people still come here asking for opinions and advice. It doesn’t all have to go in the same direction though – your opinion is that he did ok, mine is that he didn’t. He asked how to get over it – the answer for me is that he acted like an AH and needs to realise that. That’s how he gets over the situation.
It doesn’t mean I ‘shit’ on OP because I disagree with him, you, or a % of posters. And in fact my comment on ‘feeling safe’ which I think set you off wasn’t even directed at OP, it was directed at you, as you brought that up. The man is in his own house with his wife and another human – what could possibly make him feel unsafe? This isn’t walking through Hackney at night in the 90s. It’s his own home. I think you might have meant a place where he felt ‘comfortable’ rather than ‘safe’. But those are two very different things.
How in the hell did you get so entitled. This is your baby it’s never going to be your baby. If I were in her position, I would want you to have a little to do with it as possible. Eventually, yes when the child comes to stay with you. You will have to have some sort of pseudo-relationship. But you’re never going to be the mother she doesn’t want you to be and she is the child’s mother. You are the girlfriend fiancé of her ex. Her ex will be the father, but she will not be the mother. How do you not see this and why do you think you deserve that kind of position that you haven’t even earned. She’s giving birth she carried the baby it’s her baby.
I’d also be afraid about having kids with her. Seems genetic
Sounds like your partner thinks she’s better than you. I’m not saying break up with her, however it really doesn’t sound like she respects you.
Bro.
Seriously.
This girl ain’t worth the stress. Break free from her and you’ll stop thinking you’re crazy.
We all learn eventually from experience that some women will make us feel like we have some failing, only to realize after the fact there was nothing wrong with us at all.
This one’s for the streets.
Transphobe
I'm from the UK too. I'm sorry but this does sound like you're not exhausting all avenues available to you. What about local Facebook groups? Was your partner not attending the pregnant women classes and things like that?
There are no teenagers wanting to earn some pocket money near you?
I'm not sure I understand your objection. He has porn saved in his telegram messages. But you know he watches porn. These aren't pictures of exes or anything, correct? He's probably just using it as a rough bookmark type thing. How are things between you in terms of intimacy? Do you have fun in bed? Is he generous and attentive? Is your intimacy is suffering it could be the porn. And that's an issue. But if you're happy with your love life? I don't see a problem here. I'm confused. Fill me in. Why did you get upset.
She said it's not cause she thinks I want to fuck her just that I'm breaking a promise.. thing is it's nude to unlearn a behaviour and the be told her as much – I will try not to use that name but I can't promise as I will accidentally use it again.
She is a jealous person. I thought I could handle it as I've never once been unfaithful in my life so she'd have no grounds to feel jealous…
That's something you need to talk to her about. She is the only one who can answer that.
Dude if the sub is upsetting you act like an adult and leave. IDK why it's my problem you're upset?
Per her own comments he does leave her 'high and dry' more often then she'd like. She's allowed to voice her opinions on him being a lazy sexual partner. And frankly, she doesn't need all these randos defending him on her own post