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Elfy Haze, y.o.
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Live Live Sex Chat rooms Elfy Haze
Date: October 11, 2022
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Have you learned about the dunning Kruger effect yet? If you’re still just a student maybe hold off speculating about people like this. I wear long clothing in the summer, including jackets sometimes, just to keep the sun off my skin because I burn easily.
That sounds healthy. Why not just talk to him then?
You’re the exact reason I’m so vehement about young women getting into these age gap relationships. At 20 she had no idea what a man child she’d be dealing with. At 32, seems like you haven’t grown up at all
Tell him to leave or you leave. It’s always miraculously people that don’t have family and nowhere to go… you don’t have family anywhere else? You don’t have friends?
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“I’m so not angry I was dumped, he’s angry for dumping me”
Have you considered the possibility that you may need a… Rage Room? I could google it-admittedly it sounds self explanatory. But you sound like you’re struggling to intellectualize being rejected rather confront the negative feelings head-on.
Ask her, not him. It's possible he's not happy with GF1 having X, and is not secure enough to let you be poly, in which case, you need a chat with her to figure out if this works for you. Don’t let BF decide for you. It's not just his relationship.
He can literally ask anyone else to help him shoot content, and if he wanted company he could've asked his best friend. His intentions are not platonic.
I know it’s not my place to tell her not to do this.
It's not and most people venting in a workplace will shoot the messenger if the messenger is siding with the management, regardless of race issues.
Others have said this but nod a lot and say a few things like “that must feel bad” and other relatively neutral empathetic things. You can say “I imagine it's hot being the only black person here” because, for all intents and purposes, that part is true.
If you can change the topic. You are work buddies which is a step above acquaintance but you aren't close friends (I assume you don't go out during non-work hours), so don't go too far or too deep in this situation.
I'm going to hell on a business class seat
You’re misunderstanding what the actual analogue is.
Of course the differences you’re pointing out are true. Nobody suggested porn and rom-cons are the same things, lol.
It’s ok to miss the point.
So you think it's worth trying to stop using birth control?
Im a bi sexual woman what he described is cheating unless you’re okay with opening up the marriage, one sidedly it seems, I’m tired of people falling for these assholes using their sexuality as a free pass to force their partners to let them cheat.
This relationship is doomed.
He isn't willing to give up casual drug use, and likely will not stop pestering you to “Just try some” which is about as appealing to you as a root canal.
It is pressuring, it is manipulative, and he is unlikely to stop.
Sorry.
I asked if I could have some time to myself maybe 1 weekend a month I can stay home, she said no. It's all or nothing with us.
This is insane to me because as parents you NEED to take time off. You need time away. It sucks she's been doing it so long without breaks but you need time to reset. It was a little unreasonable for her to not want you to have time for yourself. At least now you get all the time you want.
I realize you have some damage to work through, and it's contributing to your behavior, but speaking as someone who's been in your boyfriend's shoes, he doesn't have attachment issues, he has trust issues.
You're giving him PTSD. you've always got one foot out the door. You've always got an escape plan. You've come and gone so many times he can't be sure you'll be there when he gets off work each day.
He thinks about this all the time. His entire life is dominated by the thought of you having another bad day and leaving him…… Again. It's fucking exhausting. It's traumatic and exhausting. When he says he's emotionally drained, believe him.
The one and only way you'll get him back is by assuring him you don't have an escape plan, that you won't just up and leave (again!) without a good reason. Easier said than done at this point. You have to regain a broken trust.
The problem is, I don't think you can do that. Based on your own words, your not there yet, and it's not really fair to him to expect him to wait it out.
You've got some issues to work through, and they're not going to magically go away just because you want it real bad. Are you capable of working through them while giving him the stability he deserves at the exact same time?
If not, as much as it pains you, you might have to let him go. You need to heal, or at least learn how to maintain a healthy relationship while you're healing, and you don't know how. Not yet.
Yup. Perception trumps intention.
that is so difficult to do – but the more you practice and act out these skills, the easier they will be to employ in the future, and the less anxiety you will feel. congratulations and i hope this makes you at ease in the future when sticking up for yourself with a boundary pusher.
He's testing you. Just repeat your rule each time. Btw: your rule is smart. Don't bend.
DTMFA
For me this is a clear sign that you guys shouldn't be exclusive. I personally think you are more in the wrong than her, but this is my personal.pov.
First, you guys are fwb. Why you feel entitled to go through her phone is a mistery to me. If you are insecure now when you guys are just having sex with no commitment, I can't imagine how controlling you can be if she is a girlfriend.
Second she lied to you, which is never a good sign. She should tell you the truth or be cristal clear that she will not discuss her past with you in any instance. However, she is your fuck buddy, so she doesn't exactly own you anything. Why do you care if she slept with this guy? You are afraid that she is still sleeping with him? And if she told you the truth, what exactly would you do with it?
You learned some hot stuff about each other. She learned that you would go through her phone even when you guys are not even dating cause you can't trust her. You learned that she lied and can't be trusted. Not good basis for a relationship.
And yeah, you are an ahole. She is a liar, but she lied to her fuck buddy, not her boyfriend. You violated her privacy when she doesn't own you anything and was seeing you casually. You are totally in the right to see her in a new light due this but you are not right in how you discovered it.
Maybe…it's kind of eating away at me.
I mean, mom is right. Your age group bathes in sunny liberal views all day every day and can't even imagine a different reaction. Well she got it. What did she honestly expect what going to happen? Also who cares? Let them all die out. No point in trying to please them.
I appreciate the honesty lol. And I agree. It would be different if this was a prestigious position but it’s an entry level job. Plus she already has an offer at our alma mater which is near both of us.
Of course I don’t want to inhibit her career aspirations, but the local job is equal, if not better, in terms of pay compared to the New Orleans job. The entire situation is baffling and really makes me rethink how much she values our relationship.