We have an 11 month old daughter. My husband has always said that he wanted a close age gap between kids, “2 under 2” type. So right around when she turned 8 months, he wanted to start trying for baby #2. I’m not ready to have another baby yet. I want to give my body more time to recover and to just be myself without being pregnant for a bit. We’re still young and have plenty of time to have kids- I don’t get what the rush is. I told him this but he kept insisting/pressuring me. So for the past 3 months, I’ve been taking birth control without him knowing. I feel bad, and it’s nude to hide it when we’re with each other all the time. Obviously I’ll stop taking it when I’m ready, but for the time being I feel like it’s what’s best for me and intend on sticking with it- should I? Or should I tell him? I don’t know what his reaction would be and don’t want to cause bigger problems.
EDIT: I want to address some comments I’ve been seeing a lot of. I don’t want to leave my husband. We’ve been together since high school, he was my first boyfriend and all I knew. Before having kids, I was also on board with the close in age thing. However, I changed my mind as my first pregnancy took a toll on me. He hasn’t always been this pushy about it, it just started recently. He has an age gap with his brother and they ended up not being close, so I think he’s paranoid of that happening with our child(ren). I really do love him and I want to make things work, especially for our daughter’s sake of having stable parents. I am going to try to get my doctor on board, so maybe if he hears it from someone other than me, he will stop nagging. I also do not want to get an IUD or an implant. My biggest fear is that he may tamper with my birth control if he found out, but this may be an irrational fear on my part- I’m not sure if he actually would. I’m not scared of him getting physically violent as he never has.
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