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THAT!
His ego is wounded. Mr. Lover Lover has been called out for not being able to satisfy OP sexually/ hurting her. He doesn't know that other guys get told off by tgeir girls for exactly the same thing.
Fingernails scrape. And mens ideas of what is nice to a woman often do not coincede with what she really likes.
But then… I generally do hate getting my hands led to Mr.'s bodyparts especially greedy for stimulation. I understand why he got flustered.
The point is that he is giving OP the silent treatmemt for being an insensible jerk who doesn't know how to handle his girl even after 4!!!!! years!
Manipulative.
On the other hand OP starts the “rejected girl” behavior and starts chasing after him “for talk”.
Don't. Really honestly don't.
My own experience is that if a woman tries to hunt down a man “for talk” they start getting cornered.
And will more likely bomb their way out of the relationship through the backdoor. Than grant the womans wish.
And even if some DO… it may get very painful.
It's like pulling a growling dog out of its kennel by its tail. It will bite you more likely than not.
More sensible would be to leave the door ajar. Tell him: “Let me know when you are ready to talk.”
And busy oneself with getting oneself fixed again.
That “man on the run” phenenon triggers the “daddy leaves me forever” phenomenon, some women may have contracted during childhood.
Which makes the woman go after the man and seek validation from him. Showing him “she isn't all that bad to run away from her.”.
Which mostly makes the man run even faster and further.
The longer he is being chased, the more needy the woman appears, the more he loses respect, the less he will be able or willing to acknowledge her feelings.
Seeing OP cry after she succeeded to corner him made his manipulation effort to make HER feel guilty abort.
So he punished her with the “see if I care” mode.
It's just “games people play.”
What I would recomend OP is:
Get therapy. Explain the dynamics. And let yourself be explained where your gut felt anxiety comes from whenever he turns away and doesn't talk.
It's not just him. It's a triggered behavior that comes from past experiences, likely childhood.
Why do I know that?
Because I have had some of that batshit also.
I perfectly know now, what male behavior triggers which of my own behaviors. And I know, that a real good man in a relationship will never give me such trouble.
That it has tons to do with boyfriend/ partner picking patterns.
That we pick who we pick to learn our lessons. Because “the wrong pick” will invariably lead to such things to pop up and cause drama.
Where the right pick just talks to you and finds a solution without having to run because of a teeny tiny injured ego.
So my immediate advice would be: end it. That's unneccessary drama. He did something painful, hsd been told it's painful. But keeps doing it again.
THAT!
His ego is wounded. Mr. Lover Lover has been called out for not being able to satisfy OP sexually/ hurting her. He doesn't know that other guys get told off by tgeir girls for exactly the same thing.
Fingernails scrape. And mens ideas of what is nice to a woman often do not coincede with what she really likes.
But then… I generally do hate getting my hands led to Mr.'s bodyparts especially greedy for stimulation. I understand why he got flustered.
The point is that he is giving OP the silent treatmemt for being an insensible jerk who doesn't know how to handle his girl even after 4!!!!! years!
Manipulative.
On the other hand OP starts the “rejected girl” behavior and starts chasing after him “for talk”.
Don't. Really honestly don't.
My own experience is that if a woman tries to hunt down a man “for talk” they start getting cornered.
And will more likely bomb their way out of the relationship through the backdoor. Than grant the womans wish.
And even if some DO… it may get very painful.
It's like pulling a growling dog out of its kennel by its tail. It will bite you more likely than not.
More sensible would be to leave the door ajar. Tell him: “Let me know when you are ready to talk.”
And busy oneself with getting oneself fixed again.
That “man on the run” phenenon triggers the “daddy leaves me forever” phenomenon, some women may have contracted during childhood.
Which makes the woman go after the man and seek validation from him. Showing him “she isn't all that bad to run away from her.”.
Which mostly makes the man run even faster and further.
The longer he is being chased, the more needy the woman appears, the more he loses respect, the less he will be able or willing to acknowledge her feelings.
Seeing OP cry after she succeeded to corner him made his manipulation effort to make HER feel guilty abort.
So he punished her with the “see if I care” mode.
It's just “games people play.”
What I would recomend OP is:
Get therapy. Explain the dynamics. And let yourself be explained where your gut felt anxiety comes from whenever he turns away and doesn't talk.
It's not just him. It's a triggered behavior that comes from past experiences, likely childhood.
Why do I know that?
Because I have had some of that batshit also.
I perfectly know now, what male behavior triggers which of my own behaviors. And I know, that a real good man in a relationship will never give me such trouble.
That it has tons to do with boyfriend/ partner picking patterns.
That we pick who we pick to learn our lessons. Because “the wrong pick” will invariably lead to such things to pop up and cause drama.
Where the right pick just talks to you and finds a solution without having to run because of a teeny tiny injured ego.
So my immediate advice would be: end it. That's unneccessary drama. He did something painful, hsd been told it's painful. But keeps doing it again.
Meaning: he likes to hurt you.
What would you want with such a guy?