You can ask for whatever you want and you absolutely should. But cuddling very hot, playing with your hair, that's all very typical. Unless there's a reason we need to go somewhere or something, laying in bed together hard and having after sex fun together is as good as having sex. You certainly aren't asking for anything extreme.
He would rather fight with redditors than actually think about the root of the problem
Going out for lunch in a group setting where a male happens to be there? Absolutely not.
Is she going out of her way to hide those details? Maybe.
You can ask for whatever you want and you absolutely should. But cuddling very hot, playing with your hair, that's all very typical. Unless there's a reason we need to go somewhere or something, laying in bed together hard and having after sex fun together is as good as having sex. You certainly aren't asking for anything extreme.