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♥, NEW MODEL ♥ take my control and lets have fun/AT GOAL: FULLY VERY HOT / 50% off on my SNAPCHAT [92 tokens remaining]
Date: October 28, 2022
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This is a huge breach in trust! Honestly, I don’t know how you can get past this.
If he can hide something like this from you, what else is he capable of hiding?
He should have sat you down and told you about his dad and stepmoms request as soon as it was made. Not only did he not do that, but he then proceeded to hide his decision, and then all the subsequent procedure he needed to attend to donate. How utterly disheartening that you had to hear this type of news from your SMIL.
I’m so sorry this happened. You deserve better from your husband!
Down the rabbit hole I went
It’s totally too large for a cell phone, I kept breaking phones and I finally realized they are just too big for my small hands. I now have a 13 mini and never drop it.
You mean, you ran away from your problems and then went back to it after it have gotten worse.
This is the level of care your bf will give to something completely dependent on him. Is this the kind of partner you want? What happens if you need to be taken care of?
If you’re not ready to call the relationship done, then I’d tell him he needs to look into doggy daycare and you’re getting your own place again. It’s not okay that you sacrifice your mental health and career for his dog.
Sorry that your ex is a dick. I've made it 55 yrs without hiring a sex worker and that will extend to the grave. I don't get “the need” to do this other than not having a SO but if you're attached then why put the one you're supposed to love through something like that, just plain nasty plus out of US… My Gawd I'd be scared to death that I'd just been sexed to death. Don't play Russian roulette with your life like he did, if you did do anything between the time he got back and when he told you get tested and continue to get tested for however long they recommend and if not than thank your lucky stars you dodged a bullet and stay away from him and don't give him the opportunity to put your life on the line…also this may not have been his first time so maybe get tested anyways. Good luck and remember you're worth more…way more than what he's treating your worth as.
One thing I would reassure yourself is you are a good person who is deserving of the love you give. In his eyes he didn’t see you as that person but that’s the fault of him, not you. Losing any relationship is tough, so I’m sorry you are going through this! Take time for yourself and focus on yourself. Spend more time with people who lift you up and care for you. Most importantly, don’t settle for anything less than you deserve!
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She is not painting herself, she is tanning herself.
Most importantly, this was already her habit, she did not do it for the character specifically.
I'm confused – did I miss something? Did he post something new? I don't see anything else in his history.
Ugh, I'm sorry. This is very sad.
But the whole reason for saving oneself for marriage was back before divorce was generally acceptable, and saving oneself was a good way for women to maintain a guy's interest long enough to marry. Once married, they were stuck together whatever the case.
Nowadays, people expect good sexual chemistry, and have the option to leave. That was not always the case before.
Lesson learned. But next time, don't be afraid to get intimate with a partner before marriage. The earlier you both know there's solid physical intimacy, the better your next marriage may be. It's important!
When I have women who seem like their flirting, I always try to slip the fact I'm married in, casually.
“Yeah, I was talking to my Wife the other day, and….”.
This coupled with making sure my ring is always visible, usually does the trick. And most of the time, I end up with some pretty good female friends, who will shut down any other women who try.
That’s why u don’t get engaged after 6months. Try 5years next time
This made me laugh so hot. I feel it. I love baking and my kids tell me they would rather have the cinnamon rolls in the tube.
I was just as stumped as you on what to do although the stroganoff seems like a good fix, after you tell your partner and have a good laugh.
But am I too insecure or valid?
Trash
Thanks for your opinion but I have to disagree. We know his heritage. All of the counseling we went to prior to adoption told us to be open and honest with him (in an age appropriate manner of course) as he grows and not to hide anything from him. So for us to make him believe he is genetically tied to one country while knowing his roots are in another would be contrary to what multiple therapists advised.
Unlike a lot of antagonistic replies here that value punishment over boundaries / consequences, I’d recommend something else.
Decide if you want to attempt to salvage the relationship. Of you do, starting hill out or being antagonistic won’t achieve this. If you don’t, get a lawyer, don’t try to push him out.
You work alternating shifts, and you can easily become distant. Consider childcare like a preschool or a nanny. Take that stressor off the plate and lighten the burden on both of you.
Have a conversation about expectations. Invite him to explain his grievances and acknowledge them. Then express yours. The issue should focus on who does what, it should focus on understanding one another.
Get an emotionally focused marriage counselor to help mediate difficult discussions. It isn’t easy having to face the reality that or performed wounds may be the result of our own unrealistic expectations.
Don’t manage his emotions, and don’t let him manage yours. It’s not uncommon for codependent behavior to crop up in long term relationships. Make sure you are accountable for your emotional health and not his.
Yeah. So I looked this up.
I think there's a tremendous difference with what I'm implying. I am essentially searching for and expecting equal effort in the relationship, not attempting to be the submissive party in it.
With regards to BDSM, we both took one of those live! tests, im a Flex and she is a Sub. Regardless, a flr wouldn't jive well with my lifestyle. I personally need support and encouragement in my ventures. (She knows this). I'm running thin as it is working 80+ hr weeks trying to attain the first step in my goal (financial growth). All the while making time to spend with my wife as much as possible. This time is cut short because nothing gets completed around the house unless I do it.
Mind you, she's unemployed and sits at home watching Netflix and YouTube and reading. Her weekly screen time report from her phone displayed 16 hours of daily continuous use throughout the week. Whereas I spend approximately 1 – 2 hours on my phone daily.
How can this even fall within the criteria of a flr when she literally does nothing and makes little effort to better the relationship?
Story time: A while ago I shared a desire I had, that I would like to be woken up to a handjob/ bj. It was one of the rare days off I would have, as I wouldn't need to be up for work. She agreed and said, “she'd be happy too”. I showered, shaved, and was completely ready for the morning after a nice sleep in. She entered the room, woke me up, and then after a 5 min cuddle.. left the room. I asked her about it later that day, and she said, “I was going to, but then I psyched myself out of it”. Essentially, she chickened out. Couldn't even bring herself to touch her husband sexually.
Trust me, I asked all the questions. Explored possibilities of previous trauma or parental upbringing. Or what feelings she had in the moment. From what I gathered, she just didn't want to put in the effort. Same with showering. She complains that its too much effort… I once dragged her into the shower after a long 5 day stint, and boy, she was upset.
In saying that, I don't think this has much to do with a flr. I believe that it's extreme laziness and inability to self motivate, although we've talked about that too…
But yet, she she has no problem arranging extensive hangouts with friends: getting her nails done, hair, eating out etc.
I’ll never understand how a woman can consistently have sex multiple times a day, every day. I would be so sore.
You need to ask her. It could be that the “honeymoon” period for her is over, or she was giving into what you wanted but couldn’t continue at that pace, or life stressors got in the way. Are you making sure she is orgasming? That she is being pleased too, and not just faking it?
Don't go back. Stay strong and don't go back. I guess if your family shows true contrition and takes action to build a connection, maybe it's worth resuming a relationship. But somehow I doubt they're willing to do the work.
And again, find a therapist who specializes in toxic family dynamics. There's a lingering question that you need to answer for yourself: Why did you value your family so much, when they valued you so little? You suffered so much pain for the sake of your family's happiness. That's an immense sacrifice. They, on the other hand, caused you so much pain–by stealing your man and then ordering you to shut up and accept the betrayal. That's one hell of a one-sided relationship.
Crappy behavior like this from immediate family can really fuck up a person. The relationships we have with our immediate family deeply influences how we relate to other people and the perspective through which we see the world. So even though you've removed them from your life, your mindset may have been skewed by what you've been through. So find a therapist.
You are her second choice. Besides, she has lied to you, and will do so in the future. You are wasting your time on her.
You should leave her alone and try to be fun around your other friends so when she approaches you you could say something like “nah you don't want to hangout with someone as boring as myself” lmao
You really like hypothetical situations, eh? You don't have anything compelling enough to argue with the facts alone, so you have to add in some outrage to get your point across. You also like to twist things… I'm not supporting anybody here… Literally… I'm only explaining that people don't have to disclose every single detail about their past. It is actually you who is being sexist because you seemingly believe a woman has to disclose any time a penis has been near her. Sex work is real work. Do I disclose every single job I've ever had to a new employer? No. Only the best ones. Everybody self edits and portrays themselves in the best possible light. What's important is she isn't still making the videos lol ?♂️.
It’s a post asking for relationship advice. I offered my advice that the real issue is the hiding and lying by omission.
He’s cheated before & he’s cheating again.
Exactly this. Fuck couples counseling.
I'd take my child and they better not show up infront of me.
Being a trailing spouse often means that job prospects are minimal and often limited to on base options as you’re not even really allowed to work on the local economy at a NATO base for example.
Anyway….where is this friend coming from? Why does she think you’ll be abused? That didn’t just come out of thin air so she’s either projecting her own situation or she has actually observed or hears about something concerning.
Statistically, women are at higher risk of staying in an abusive relationship (financial, emotional, physical) when they are SAH and don’t have their own income. If that’s her angle, I get it to an extent. But I’ve been the leading and the trailing spouse and know lots of others and…no abuse. It’s very possible, especially in the military context, for the non member to be SAH and no issues.
I had a good friend from college voice similar concerns when I was a stay at home dog mom/stepmom. She felt like I was wasting precious career time. She wasn’t wrong per se but I literally couldn’t work AND handle everything else with the back to back PCSs, UAT, unaccompanied tour, TDYs, bidding research, training for next post (crash bang, language), and step kids. I did some volunteer work but I was so busy!
Frankly, I think that people who aren’t familiar with military/gov’t life don’t realize how much is expected of a spouse of the member and how much work is involved and why working is sometimes just not feasible.
Pass