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hot show oil [1467 tokens remaining]
Date: December 26, 2022
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You need to rehome your dog immediately or accept that it's not your dog any more. Anything you leave with an abusive partner like that is just a tool to be used against you. It's nice you wanted the dogs to have company but the longer your dog is with him, the less chance you have of ever getting it back.
Relationships get 100x more complicated when kids are had, and sex stops, and stress is a constant. Still an asshole for trying to cheat but i get it
Your education never goes to waste. That degree will still be a part of your resume when the kids go off to college and eventually move out on their own
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I didn’t mention in the original post bc I wanted people to kind if take his side so I could hear it, but he games for hours a day. Works 15 or less hours a week, and games the rest of the time.
I feel for OP here and agree with most of the comments that this isn't a good look. My only issue is I have read a hundred of these exact stories where a dude says the same thing and the comments are exactly opposite, telling him to get over it because they didn't explicitly say there were excusive and in a relationship. Which actually drives me nuts but thats neither here nor there.
Again, agree with the comments here just wish advice would be more uniform and not depend on the gender of OP.
Sounds like he’s already opened up the relationship whether you like it or not. I’d just leave
If she got raped that's horrible. But as she admitted she already made the decision to cheat on you before that unfortunate incident happened. why was she in his room to begin with while intoxicated? Why did she think having sex was the only option when she had her own room? Sounds like she wanted to cheat to a certain extent but it went further than she wanted. Whatever decision you decide to make don't let yourself forget that she chose to cheat on you and only told you because it didn't go how she wanted it to and came to you for sympathy for cheating on you.
Why not seek a relationship that makes you happy? A relationship that makes you feel good? Where you know your partner loves, values, and respects you?
Why do you think it's your job to be quiet and not complain, not ask for anything, not annoy him? Do you think that's what all women deserve in their relationships: “Shut the fuck up and stay out of the way”?
Set a budget for the toys. Don’t go over it.
I told him that his sister makes me feel uncomfortable. However he said that it’s because she cares for him and that’s why. I didn’t mention this topic yet cuz I’m not ready to bring it up yet or I need some more time to confirm this
You need to ask yourself if this is worth the risk. Even asking for an open relationship would be a deal breaker for most people. I know I’d be done. Are you also prepared for this to go both ways? If you read the stories on here, this rarely ends well.
It's not often when I ask him to see my videos. I have like 20 videos total which I posted throughout a year. The first ones I asked him to watch but the last ones I have stopped trying.
I'm not insecure about being a good singer at all hahaha. I'm just a bit sad that he does not seem to care about something I'm so proud of. As someone who's grown with musicians I feel like I don't share the feeling of your analogy (my brother is a drummer, my mother plays guitar 24/7 and my dad used to play sax and now piano… my house has always been loud), but I understand how it might be different for someone else. I don't think he has a need for a quiet space as he will blast his music any chance he has ? But I understand that as his taste in music is different than mine, listening to me might be a bit dull.
Thank you for your message! ✨
Gross all around. Wouldn’t be able to let him touch me.
As a childfree woman, never ever date a man who wants children or is anti-choice. I'd strongly recommend throwing this one back.
Don’t be a homewrecker. That’s his life to figure out.
Can you possibly list a few examples of things you could do for her? I mean her just vaguely saying you need to do more but then saying she can’t tell you what isn’t very helpful. So maybe try offering a few things and seeing if anything strikes a cord:
Do you want me to plan more of our daily activities? Do you want me to help more around the house (if you live together) Do you want me to touch you/cuddle you/whatever more?
See where this conversation gets you.
He needs to wear some ear plugs than
You told him the relationship was done… he did nothing wrong.
Hey I replied to you yesterday in the other forum.
You did a great job here, you gave her agency in her decision, you indicated research into working WITH the cat, and you both apologized.
And it sounds like, all else fails, she loves you enough to rehome the cat. That’s a really big thing for her to offer, and so is everything you are doing.
My wife has a horse, had the horse before I met her. It’s been over a decade and I’ve learned to ride, rope, and everything else on him. She loves me because I love her animals too. But it was naked, totally different world at first. Fortunately I didn’t have allergies to contend with.
Ignore the people still shitting on you, this was a great update.
I see a few who say this is not inappropriate. If you look into this more, there are several reason this is not.
1 he is not doing this in a professional capacity, only as a friend and coworker. it is required to have paperwork done such as informed consent before entering in a counseling relationship.
2 dual relationships are frowned upon in this field as it can contain conflicts and makes it difficult to remain impartial.
3 their are guideline to follow regarding fees, codes of ethics, treatment planning and goal setting ect.
There are other issue but over all, getting his advice or treatment in an unofficial capacity with no oversight. In short he is getting advice from a female friend he works with
Wow, what a chore of a person. You're 3 weeks in, so no love lost. Sounds like a nightmare to be around.
So your response to him communicating his needs and concerns was to blow up? That’s mature. ?
I dunno. I don’t care if my partner games while I’m asleep or when I’m going doing my own hobbies. So I don’t see the issue if you’re up early playing and it has no impact on you. But it would bother me (44F) if it was excessive especially when I’m home and we could be doing something together.
Obviously, his comment isn’t just about today. It’s about the amount of time you spend gaming overall.
Maybe what you’re doing isn’t excessive. I dunno. But if you spend several hours a day every day gaming then perhaps it is excessive.
And, as another poster mentioned, he may find it kind of immature and a turn off overall. It’s sure not how I’d want to spend my time—sitting on my butt and getting nothing done around the house doesn’t appeal to me. But everyone is different. You probably wouldn’t enjoy my hobbies that are more active. And that’s fair too.
I don't like my bias against this sub influencing me, but I feel like I know the reason
No, don’t ask her to leave the tip. Something tells me she’s a shitty tipper.
You told her that her wanting to marry you is her nagging you.
You have made it clear that if you are dying in the hospital, you’d rather have your parents there making decisions instead of her.
You, for some reason, think that if you buy a house together it will be less messy if you aren’t married.
Figure out why you are still with your girlfriend if you don’t want her to be happy.
If you aren’t sure you want to marry her, then break up so she can find someone who is excited to spend their life with her.
Honestly?
A lot of these scammers actively solicit, so it wouldn't shock me if it was his only time doing anything. They are wanting people who don't do dick pics so often they wouldn't care about consequences. They are looking for people who might pay extortion. It's an active search.
Doesn't change what he did.
I would make sure EVERY SINGLE PERSON at my wedding knew he was going to do this and I would make sure that ALL OF THEM called his ass out when he arrives. Shame the shit out of him, embarrass him, make him feel small, childish and stupid. That may help break this “prank war” he’s in.
No where in her post or comments does she say she left him. In fact, she even said they have a family event tonight they will be attending together.
You need to find a better guy. This reeks of him being insecure, passive aggressive and emotionally abusive. Did he “love bomb” you? This sometimes happens & then you form a bond that seems once in a lifetime then all of a sudden emotional abuse begins. Sometimes these types of guys will try breaking you via other women. They want to break your self esteem. The best revenge is to genuinely not care. Make that crystal fuckin clear to them right away too. With the guy you're with now, I'd say break up. It sounds like hs a loser. I would begin the process of breaking the addiction and focusing on bettering your life. You attract what you are so if you work super naked and have a good life- you'll attract a good guy who has those same relationship values. Also men who come from divorced parents have a much higher rate of not having successful relationships. So keep in mind if you are aiming for a life partner to look for red flags of a guy who's going to be the type that has a couple gfs when they're in their twenties- and then are losers all alone (or losers hiring escorts) in their older years.
I mean I actively told him that I love being posted on social media since I've been cheated on before by guys who never posted me on their social media pages. I am in therapy, and my worth doesn't rely on being posted I just like being shown off I'm a good looking young lady and I love to be posted like that. Shoot I post him all the time he gets annoyed if I don't post him.
This is not an autism thing. This is a simply “I don't care to put in the energy to be polite and a decent person to others” thing.
It takes some of us a LONG time to get to that point OP. 😉 It did for me. :p
Anyone who says their relationship is amazing but….You can almost guarantee is full of red flags ?
Anyone who says their relationship is amazing but….You can almost guarantee is full of red flags ?
You are the kind of girl I hate.
I can't pretend that I understand your problem. I really don't mind which one of my names my girlfriend chooses to call me but hey I got my own things that other people don't understand.
So, the question is, is this a deal-breaker for you? If yes, then let him know that he might not be able to understand it but it's a big deal to you and you won't change your mind about it. Let him know that it may not be fun to call you the name you want but that's what you prefer to be called any way and there's just no other option. Just say this is one of the few things that will seem to not have much explanation but need to be understood by him.
Similar things happen in many relationships so if he likes you, he'll soon start calling you your preferred title.
I don’t part of that like sitting down and talking
You sure didn't mind talking when you were insulting him. To repair the damage you have done, you may have to do some things you don't want to do…face the music and talk to him.
Maybe it’s just me, but I feel like liking someone’s instagram posts isn’t an indicator of anything serious? It’s a pretty inoccuous thing
Don't you understand, showing you who you are, holding up a mirror IS helping you. Explicitly you.
Stress hives are a thing, my MIL gets them all the time
Hahahahahhahahahahhahaaaa Oh man. Get some solo therapy and let the poor woman live! her own life away from you
He’s a selfish child. Keep telling him no and if he won’t listen and respect you then dump him.
You do not want to be in a coercive relationship with him sexually assaulting you which is what it would be if he did things against your will.
I have deleted my comment because I think it was unnecessary.
I'll repeat it here just so the context isn't gone, but I don't want it to be so prominent.
“Not to be mean, but op did say that she was obese. Outside of the US that is quite extreme.”
I see what you mean, I'm not from a desi culture so I don't understand the nuance. The tone of the post is not the nicest and I shouldn't really have weighed in.
I don't want to see the girl bashed either. Thanks for your reply.
I agree that people should be allowed to follow their dreams.