0 views
KENDALL Navarro , ♥♥, 25 y.o.
Location:
Room subject:
To Start live! video press there
On-line Live Sex Chat rooms KENDALL Navarro , ♥♥
Date: October 17, 2022
The ad code is not a valid HTML code.
Fix the ad code in the Theme options.
Fix the ad code in the Theme options.
it might be uncomfortable to you, but why is it inappropriate? are you American? American's have such weird cultural hookups about bodies and the naked body. personally, i don't see how a hard body is “inappropriate” and a toddler should be taught that bodies are natural, as is the hard body.
nude bodies aren't inherently sexual and i personally don't think a child should be taught that a hard body = sex/sexual/dirty. she's 3.
I feel like you may be over thinking this. There's nothing wrong with experimenting and having your fun, especially while you're young and have the freedom to do so. If anything it just teaches you how to be a better partner for your boyfriend, at least that's what I learned from my escapades. Unless you accidentally choked someone to death in bed or got some highly infectious disease, I would say you probably shouldn't be so concerned. If he asks, then feel free to tell him, but acting like you have something to be ashamed and guilty of is not going to do anything but make him think you did something wrong and can't be trusted. There's nothing to be gained from telling him something that doesn't have any reason to affect him.
lol ?
Most likely. I know it’s probably the smartest thing to try and just cut contact completely but i’m still not ready to give up on the relationship
Come on bro there is nothing to talk about. Our girl wants to go an hoe around for a bit, then when she is done with meaningless sex she wants to come back to you for a meaningful relationship. It’s like the girl in Forrest Gump, cut your losses and move on. Take in how I said our girl and not your girl, cause she belongs to the skreeeeeets
Look as a 21 yr old that has like 3 younger teen friends i see like siblings (i lived with their mom when i gave birth to my son) i get the sibling connection but… As close as i am to these kids as a big sister ive never had an one on one outing with them without including their mom.. It just doesnt sit right to me that a grown man is hanging out one on one with a girl he knew since she waa 14. … You need to wake up op, something just doesnt look right about this situatuon…this young ass girl is litterally saying shes in love with your fiance.. And while he may only look like hes acting brotherly when theyre together youve never seen them by themselves so you really have no clue what can be going on behind close doors… Im sorry but this whole situation is a giant red flag
Even though you have been nice, I just don’t feel like this is right for me. I’m sorry.
I read this on the internet:
I would rather adjust my life to your absence then to adjust my boundaries to accommodate your disrespect
She’s fine with black woman just men she’s scared as hell of only black men. Besides friends and family that are black men she’s okay with
What was the fight about and why does she feel she can’t trust you for her love and affection to be permissive there could be a valid reason
thanks for sharing this.
There is a movement that social media is bad (the data varies)
Some people like to not use it because of this
She is probably one of them
Ask him if he wants some company or if he just wants to rest. Go from there.
Thanks
Good point
It’s not your responsibility. My ex did to, j left him and he’s still alive and walki around to this day. If she threatens to hurt herself, call an ambulance. You can’t save her life.
haha I get what you mean but It was supposed to be light hearted joke. but yeah I understand what you mean, I do know I have that issue. what I am more struggling with is how not to be that kind of person
Move on. She's dating someone and said she isn't going to date you. Don't wait around on someone who isn't fully interested in you.
LMAO seriously. People treat autism like some serious debilitating mental disability, instead of the simple fact that their brains process information a little differently then others depending on their spectrum.
Oh my bad, i left a comment thinking you actually cared about the dude. What a mean person you are, honestly..
Ironic, it doesn't seem you were his friend at all either lmao
How do you handle the bad days? I’m not a saint myself, I don’t always have the self-control.
Did she know she wouldn't have the right to work before she arrived? If she didn't, it still wouldn't be your bad but I think if she already knew she couldn't work then she knew she'd be living off of your dime.
You don't owe her anything. I'm concerned she'll try to outstay her welcome so it might be easier to get her to leave if you offer to buy her a ticket.
Thank you! That is definitely something I wish I heard a few years ago
He can definitely get in trouble. Even though he's a minor too.
My parents stayed miserable together for the sake of the kids for 20 years. Now all 3 of us have a lot of trauma baggage because of it. Leaving an unhappy marriage is usually better for children, as seeing your parents unhappy doesn’t do them any good. At best it could give them unhealthy views on love and relationships.
Come clean to your husband and try to end things as amicably as possible.
Jesus, this whole post is a shit show. This seems like some stupid high school stuff. There are so many things wrong with it, and most of it has to do with you.
I think you're both wrong. Our misogynistic society in general puts more value into masculine things and trans woman are fetishized but there are also plenty of gay men and straight woman that have interest in trans men and straight men that do appreciate woman's genitalia.
ofc she wants a kid so she traps you and she can continue living like that LOL
Well, I heard a bit different.
It's like: “If you feel like you love two people, choose neither – there would've been no questions who to choose in case there would've been any love involved”.
I feel really sorry for OP's boyfriend. OP seems so hellbent on claiming she's not cheating when the whole fucking post have a name “blah-blah-blah I love two people”.
Can you imagine what would've OP's boyfriend thought had he known that all that's needed for OP to look for some greener grass are just a few well-placed words…
Where there's smoke there is fire. That is a very telling situation. Dig further.
What place is it that they’re going more than once a week? A bar?
he just texted me asking if we could talk. should I just not reply? I understand not talking to him cuz I don't want to date but I am pretty Hurt that he said some things id consider private to me
If you really want advice here's some:
Don't make silly ultimatums ie ultimatums you have no intent in keeping Don't ask random people if your bf broke your trust. I think you're on here because you don't care so much about the porn, but more so the fact that your bf lied to you. You seem to be trying to justify him lying to you to stay in the relationship. Know that if you do, he has no reason to be truthful in the future, regardless the topic. There are billions of nice, sweet, and lovely guys. Guys who can also keep promises and be truthful. I am blessed with such a man, but it took my 26 years to find him. Respect yourself because if you don't it will always always come back to bite you in the ass.
“Yeah I know how you feel. You’re the loosest I’ve been with”
There's been cases of children mixed up in the maternity ward.
Hey OP, don't go find the minority of comments that agree with you and pretend you are validated. It's not a crazy thing to say; it's sweet although a little immature. But there is nothing wrong with the intention. If your post was just to get people to validate you and now you're frustrated the majority don't; you shouldn't post on relationship_advice anymore.
u/fidd707, it looks like you're trying to post a throwaway submission. Your account is too young and/or your comment karma is too low.
The right way to do it is to create a brand new Reddit account that begins with ThrowRA.
Please create a new account that starts with ThrowRA in the username and try again. Please note that we will not make exceptions to this rule.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
Lol clearly you dont know women. Im going to his b*tch
This is the un-funniest.
They’re probably for him?
No, it is worse than that! She's not asking to close the relationship. She wants him to stop seeing this specific woman.
I'd like to add, the people who manage to maintain an open relationship aren't even remotely as many as the ones who can't. It's not a 50/50. More like a 99/1.
Its not about “allowing” or “forbidding” anyone anything. Boundaries are not a tool to control others. It also is a huge difference if she is talking to a male college, a male friend, a ex or a guy that she met recently with very clear intentions. When she also sais she would delete him if he wants this clearly shows that she is fishing for any sign of him taking a tiny bit of lead. It also is not for teenagers. I do not know what people you know but look at married couples that are married for a long time and still together. Do these women hang out with other single men alone frequently or don't they?
And I clearly answered the question. You will start feeling again once you get out of your dream fantasy world where your simping will make any woman stay with you. There might be women who want that kind of men but I promise you its not a lot and the chances to find one are slim.
Its not about “allowing” or “forbidding” anyone anything. Boundaries are not a tool to control others. It also is a huge difference if she is talking to a male college, a male friend, a ex or a guy that she met recently with very clear intentions. When she also sais she would delete him if he wants this clearly shows that she is fishing for any sign of him taking a tiny bit of lead. It also is not for teenagers. I do not know what people you know but look at married couples that are married for a long time and still together. Do these women hang out with other single men alone frequently or don't they?
And I clearly answered the question. You will start feeling again once you get out of your dream fantasy world where your simping will make any woman stay with you. There might be women who want that kind of men but I promise you its not a lot and the chances to find one are slim.
If anything makes you uncomfortable in a relationship, you have to talk about it. Does he still call you her name? Is he otherwise secritive?
That ain’t your boyfriend no more
I had a 'friend' do this to me. I was nothing but kind to him, and I even told him beforehand that I was not cool with it. I ended up being the bigger person and forgiving him, but it just never sat right with me. I don't talk to him anymore and by all means I'm in a much better place. Fuck you, Mitch.
Sorry, this will not get better. Your resentment/insecurity will only grow, and that will kill your relationship.
The forgiving and corny facade was meant to be an extension of my insult to them. Also did you misread my joke about catholic priests as genuine? I’m truly not a man of faith or religion. Naked core Flying Spaghetti Monster fan here.
I used to think I was not interested in getting married. Turns out it was a case of the who, not the what. I know it is difficult while you are in the relationship, but try to have a step back and think if you are really against it or is just that you are not sure about spending the rest of your life with her.
Hello /u/ShotgunSupremacy,
Your post was removed for the following reason(s):
Your title did not include at least two ages/genders or was not formatted correctly
Posts must:
include details about the involved parties including ages, genders, and length of relationship, and
request advice in real situations involving two or more people
We are enforcing the two rules listed above by making all titles start with ages/genders in the following format:
[##X][##X], [## X][## X], or [##-X][##-X] where ## is the age and X is the gender (currently M, F, T, A, NB, FTM, MTF but more can be added). You can have more than two ages/genders listed, but you must have at least two at the beginning of your title. Here is an example:
[34NB][88-F] We are two people in an example post
Please resubmit with a corrected title.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
He could be grand! But chances are he’s not. It’s pretty easy for anyone to be super nice for months. What you have mentioned: being interested in you, not asking for nudes or being sexual are bare minimums not something to praise. It’s like the ticket to admission to meet – it’s not proof he’s a great person. Many older guys will also move slower with young women because they are cultivating the trust – it’s entrapment. All that to say it’s very naked to tell the difference between the two – which is why you should go with what’s most likely to be happening.
However, if he just accidentally met you bc he didn’t adjust his features it’s likely it would have come up by now. He would have mentioned he was a little uncomfortable with the age difference or would have said I haven’t ever dated anyone so young. Expressed some sort of concern or shock (bc if he “just forgot” then it means he knows it’s creepy so he would have addressed it. Even said “I’m not really sure you are very young”.
If he’s so lovely and your sure he just forgot to change his search then just bring it up. It sounds like your scared to hear the answer. But better to hear it sooner than figure it out later. I would just ask “has the age difference ever made you uncomfortable or pause to think about”
Even if he's not cheating on you, it sounds like the friend group doesn't actually like him and have been trying to cut him out for awhile. They clearly have a low opinion of him and if they think someone they barely know is too good for him… that's a very bad sign.
If you want to text, text. There's no magic formula.
never nothing more than like 3 years younger then me
Can relate, almost always my crushes are lesbians, and when I don’t know whether or not they like men, it is awkward to ask.
My advise: be straightforward, ‘have you thought much about your sexuality?’ It’s a bit invasive, but if you’re friends it’s probably fine. If you can work it into the context of how you are navigating your own sexuality, that’s a bonus and hides your intent a bit.
Just say no because she is faithful. She is just trying to tell him that it was not her idea for all this to happen
He never said they weren't, asshole.
? Are my feelings real or is this just the initial glow of meeting someone new and nice, who may or may not be a good match under normal circumstances?
No way of telling until you spend more time together in person.
We both have our lives and careers and families in our respective countries. There is no way either of us can move in the foreseeable future.
Wow….I mean even if she's in an open marriage…you're not her first priority. You're, if at all, a secondary partner, nothing more. Why would her husband agree to her (or the whole family) moving?
It’s an issue if it’s excessive and it sounds like it is. Let’s also touch on his lack of awareness his behavior could get him fired and divorced. I know my husbands looks here and there but he has enough respect for me to not do it to my face. You’re husband has so many issues we need to call it a subscription!
Break up lol do not believe “he is like a brother”
He did admit to me that he’s never met a girls family. Even when he was in a 3 year relationship, but that was HighSchool. We’re adults now. He’s never been out of state, never been away from his family for too long. It’s like he’s scared to grow up and I don’t like that. Yes it could be because he’s shy, but I was as well. I moved in and didn’t speak to his family that lives here for a whole month bc i wasn’t comfortable. I can’t accept that anymore, because that behavior is what’s hindering us in so many ways. I never even bring up the meeting family situation cause In the past it got no where.
It’s a sign of extreme insecurity to be saying and doing what she does
That’s fair, your original post gave a very different impression of the activity thing. I still think the heart of her reaction is a combination of wanting input, trying to act on your money concerns, and FOMO.
So if she wants to extend the trip beyond what you’re currently planning for, and your costs already account for some of her preferred activities, you guys need to sit down and go through your options. Would she be willing to put in some money to get a longer trip and repeat activities? If not, then working with your current time and budget, what activities or changes to the current plans would you both agree to prioritize? Can you go with a cheaper hotel, is there parking for ATVs at all of the locations you want to go to including hotel, etc.
Also take into consideration if this is a trip you may want to do again in future or if it’s a “once in a lifetime” trip – if the latter, then you guys might be better off doing a cheaper birthday trip and (both) saving up more for the blow-out version of this trip so you don’t have any regrets. If it’s the former, then sometimes it’s good to leave things to do for next time! I would also suggest never underestimate the value of rest days that are just hanging out by the pool/on the beach/in a cute town, as opposed to scheduled spa relaxation days.
My partner and I have done “repeat trips” to two different locations: the first location we hit all the big activities the first time, and they aren’t really the sorts of things that change frequently so on the revisit they weren’t quite as enjoyable as the first time and we had to scramble for things to do when we didn’t feel like another rehash. The second location we did some of the big things on our first trip there but not all of them, so on the revisit we had plenty of new-to-us things to do as well as our previous favourites to do again.
Alzheimer’s society have done one. Google it and you’ll see a few.
I'm not sure where you've been looking, but JET has the best pay and benefits of basically any English teaching job in Japan other than direct hire/private schools/university teaching, and those positions typically don't hire from abroad.
A 30 year old man pursuing a 20 year old
Red flag.
Is known to be sketchy
Red flag.
Known liar
Red flag.
Gaslights you into feeling crazy
Red flag.
Buying a house together has complicated things a little, but good news is the answer is the same. Find friends and family who can support you and give you advise as you slowly separate his life from yours.
Youre young and have so much ahead of you, dont waste it on someone like this. Good luck.
Of course you feel mad. You just started the grieving process basically. It’s gonna be a rollercoaster of emotions that will come unannounced whenever they want. And you are finally validated cause he gaslight you for months of not years. The book and community that helped me a lot through a similar issue is Vicky Stark’s Runaway husbands. I highly recommend reading it and joining the Facebook group. One thing you will see there is that there are a lot of similarities and patterns in our stories but one thing that separates you, is none of us ever got the truth from our ex husbands. Never. Even when they were confronted with it they lied still. I know it seems like a small thing but it’s such a hangup for most women, that they never heal because of it, and they never trust again. At least you have that.
Well, apart of what others said, I guess this situation shows you how will the things go in a case of break up or any conflict with Jane.
I am all for fairness, but my each break up with an ex who I lived with was just 'I take this, you take that, I don't need any of these, is it OK if I keeo that? what shall we do with these? ' no conflict, no drama, we have just divided stuff, she sounds like she would be fighting for a grain of salt
Lol so why are you still with her?
if you know you know
A man being interested in pegging does not in any way make him gay. It's simply because for many people, men and women and everyone in between, anal penetration feels good. But I too would in no way be comfortable pegging a partner. It's not my thing and never will be but there are so many toys available that he can use on himself and that will just have to be enough for him.
UpdateMe!
Well played. I personally don't think so, but I get so excited about food I frequently ask people if they'd like to try mine. I guess the difference between acceptable and offensive is how you proceed to transfer food between people. I think there's a scale from airplane noises to using a side plate and passing it over; sounds like OP's boyfriend is closer to being a pilot.
More than fine, he just sounds generous. Sure it’s a tad bit odd, but I think it’s really wholesome the way he just wants to share his snackies!
I agree with sugarglistensticks… the less you do now the better.
you should proceed by leaving him.
That is frequently the case. I did bring it up with the op. I didn't come here asking for advice, and I didn't ask for your opinion. You can take it to someone who cares.
A bunch of stories today involving psychosis when there's usually very very few in a month's time.
Odd.
Man you are naive looking at your comments. She already cheated which means she probably already is doing it, just cut her off for your own sake already. A cheater and LDR? She is not worth the stress that's LDR, you can do better.
Don’t just walk away, RRRRRRRRUUUUUUUUUUUUNNNNNNNNNN
I don’t care that he masturbates. I care about WHAT he fantasizes about. I don’t want him thinking about other women even if it was in the past.
Meh just break up and find someone who is sexually compatible with you.
Clearly I'm doing something wrong
No, you're not. Your husband is just an idiot who went ahead with a life of being married with kids without thinking of all that that entails. People do that because of perceived societal pressures, but ultimately, it's on them, and it's their fault for not truly thinking ahead and asking themselves, honestly, what they truly want.
“Like I'm letting her win somehow”
As others have said, this just isn't how it is. Life should be viewed as inherently collaborative. Don't waste your time/mental energy thinking of this woman as someone who gets to win at your expense, this will only cause you to prioritize something other than the happiness of you and your kids. And, as naked as it is because of how much your husband has wronged you (he got you to give up your career of the false assumption that you both were fully committed to the goal of raising your family together – and this IS a great wrong), try not to waste your time/mental energy on making your husband regret what he's done, and instead, try and reach a state of indifference to his happiness. You, unfortunately, still have a relationship with him because you have kids, and when all is said and done, in a few years time, all that will matter to you in terms of your self respect (which is hugely important) is that you acted with grace and dignity in a difficult situation, and you minimized the negative impact on you and your kids' lives.
Sorry this happened to you OP, whether or not you wanted it, you've been gifted a second life, and I hope you make the most of it. Good luck!
It isn't. He just doesn't want to lose her. See this 100 times before.
I’d feel like a huge asshole for breaking up with someone just because they’re sad or depressed
Don't light yourself on fire to keep others warm. Your BF is an anchor that will sink until it hits rock bottom, you can tie it around your neck and sink with him or you can let go.
It sucks that your BF is depressed, I get it, I really do, but he still has to keep living his life either way. Plenty of people with untreated depression go to work every day and if your BFs mental health is so bad that he can't then he needs to see a psychiatrist yesterday.
thank you for your response
True, but guys can be cruel about it. If they're in sports on opposite teams, the likelihood of 'how's my dick taste?' is near 100%.
Yeah, sounds like you should break up 🙁 there's other guys out there, closer to your age too
At this point no, I wouldn’t contact him again- if he’s sincerely using this time for therapy then give him that. However, you may also need to decide if you’re willing to wait anymore. If you’re willing to edit then give him his time. You may get to the point that it will make more sense to break up vs waiting indefinitely.
He put his arms around her and hugged her back .
Naw, you're a shitposter. Nobody could possibly be as…lacking in intellect…as your responses are showing you to be.
You’ve been begging your sisters’ attention since you were little. Stop doing that. They aren’t worth your mental health. And you should go LC with your parents for a while because they are not helping the situation.
You aborted a 6 month pregnancy because some pos wouldn't call you back? What doctor in his right mind would even perform an abortion on an almost full grown baby?
Kick him out and he can not return unless and until he sees a therapist several times for violating your trust when you are this vulnerable! Otherwise he will continue to deceive you but just get better at hiding it!
Your husband is a disgusting abusive person and you deserve better.
I came up and repeated myself and said – “Please don't yell at me, I don't like it.” This was the start of spiraling fight. He came downstairs and wouldn't talk at first. I said, “I would like to talk about this, I don't like being yelled at like that”. He said ” But you wouldn't respond to me”. I asked that we talk about his actions first and then we could talk about mine but that I didn't agree that my actions justified being yelled at. He yelled at me more saying I was disrespectful to him. I continued to stick to my two main points
I’m glad you stuck to your boundaries. Now you know that he cares more about abusing you than he does about you as a person. Don’t go back, no matter how much he love-bombs and sweet-talks you. If he actually cared about you, he wouldn’t be abusing you, and he wouldn’t be defending his abuse of you. You don’t deserve this, no matter what.
He keeps texting me saying the only reason he yelled was because he couldn't hear me and that I took it way out of control. He says he doesn't think he can trust me now but still won't acknowledge that yelling is wrong.
Translation: He enjoys abusing you, he wants to abuse you, and he doesn’t give a shit about how it makes you feel. He could hear you just fine. Him saying “I can’t hear you” and devolving into a screaming abuse session is abusive. He could hear you just fine, he just wanted to abuse you.
He will never, ever change. No matter what he says.
Finally his texts started threatening to cancel our upcoming vacation and threatened to find his own place.
Take him up on that. Seriously.
What should I have done differently?
There is absolutely nothing you can do to prevent an abuser from abusing you. Period. Full stop. Nothing.
I’m actually really proud of you that you stuck to your guns, finally. Think back at all the abusive, disrespectful things he’s done to you in the past, and how much you gave up and overlooked for the sake of “love”. Then promise yourself you’ll never let that shit slide again. You deserve better than this !
You need to separate, for your own safety. If you’re in the US, call 1-800-799-7233 to formulate a plan to get out safely. Someone that this this angry could easily devolve into physical violence, so please get out safely. If you are not in the US, /u/Ebbie45 has a ton of excellent resources that can help you.
The only thing you did wrong was letting this abusive asshole get the best of you for this long, before you finally put your foot down and refused to allow yourself to be abused. You are exceptionally strong for doing this and I’m fucking proud of you. Continue this by getting therapy and getting out of this abusive relationship.
You can do this. I believe in you. ❤️
Because they were drunk and reminiscing in the moment.
It's not a crazy stretch to imagine she felt guilty in the moment because they were sharing an intimate anniversary with her husband.
Should she have maybe just kept it to herself? Yeah. It was insensitive and accomplished nothing except maybe make her feel a little better in the moment. But this is a talk it out and reaffirm each other's love kinda problem.
He's a loser. End of conversation. Run and never look back. Trust me. You WILL NOT regret it down the road.
usually maybe once a week, probably more like 2 weeks. it’s not something i just ask for no reason, usually only when he looks like he’s feeling physically unwell. and i always ask in a concerned tone so my intention is clear (well at least i think it is)
I mean I do trust her
And no she doesn't forget other things
INFO:
What is your living situation? What is your financial situation? What is your support system like?
These are important questions because they will help you figure out how to proceed. Your relationship is over. Your soon to be ex boyfriend is planning a vacation with another woman. He doesn't even care about your feelings. He's getting that new relationship energy buzz from this other girl. You can see it and you are feeling it so don't have fruitless conversations, instead, start planning your exit.
You deserve a better relationship and not one that leaves you feeling like less than.
You could always marry her and take her name.
Paying her bills does not give you any rights over the name of the children. It’s gross that you’d think this. She is carrying two of your children. You are carrying zero. This is a tiny sacrifice for you to make. It’s funny that you think the kids not having your name will make you an outsider, but the same doesn’t apply to her.
Sounds messy. But I’m here to say everyone should have one messy “thing” in their lives so that they can benchmark the difference when they find the one.
Ask her if she wants to hang out “just the two of you.” She’s almost certainly going to ask something like “ymean like a date”. And just matter of factly say “yeah.” You’ll have your answer right there. And if she says no say “ok cool, no problem. “
It’s not like it’s going to be super awkward since you only see her every so often
Also not an option where I'm from. Changing your name is very nude in Germany.
He gave her a lot of money through a private account. Three different times. His explanation makes no sense.
He ruined the relationship & broke the trust. He should go to counseling or individual therapy to help rebuild the trust. Also this man sucks 2 years shouldn’t together should’ve be a reason to stay & be treated like this.
I hold grudges so I’d just stay away from her. Be civil since everyone has to coexist, but engage in conversations other than shallow things like the weather.
ok so just so you know the whole pregnancy thing so paternity test ecc. isn’t really possible since he’s on the ace spectrum and she hasn’t been in the friend group since they broke up and she cheated on him with his friend
Girl let me be real with you, dating a guy who’s a SoundCloud rapper is not what you want for your future. I mean, truly. It’s not about being supportive or loyal. It’s about being smart. Do you really want to live! the rest of your life with someone who chooses that as a career? Self preservation is a virtue.
NAKED NO! A joint account, maybe? But after this sneak AF mice, nope he’s not getting anywhere near my $. He doesn’t believe in marriage, what about you? Saving makes sense, if you’re looking to save to buy a home (together, I assume, where you both have equal ownership). But you can do so in your win savings account. Can even meet once a month to review progress, savings and overall budget.
But there is zero chance my $ goes into an account my name is not on. Hell to the NO!
Why did she wait 6 month tho… He could've worked around or they would have determined that they're not meant for each other.
What did not make sense?
My dad's first wife couldn't conceive so he got with my mum. Once my mum birthed a few kids he left his first wife to be monogamous with my mum.
Don't listen to your mum. If your husband is fine with it that's all that counts. If he isn't, there are guys out there who don't want to be a parent or are happy to adopt. Not all adoptions are bad.
Research love bombing.
Many find themselves in abusive relationship and marriages because they were swept off their feet with someone that treated them exceptionally well at the start. And once they were trapped, the abuse started.
I’m not saying that’s the case here, because sometimes it can just be a perfect match, but I think you maybe need to figure out if this is just an act or if it’s the real him.
You current situation and decision making priority: him > you.
You express why you want out. Only you can stop invalidating yourself. Only you can put you first.
This has to be made by you. He cannot and will not, and frankly no one here should.
No one else can make the choice to be the version of happy that is best for you other than you.
You've been dating him for 3 months…why does he have any right to voice his opinion on your parenting?? That is way too soon. He doesn't understand you don't eat food left out overnight?
Are you sure he knows you are dating?????
Yikes. That’s a very slippery slope. Are you implying every drunk person who’s had sex has been assaulted?
As a sex worker, I have to say this whole situation sounds like a shit show.
Either she’s cultivating you as a sugar daddy, straight up planning to scam you, or she has a serious problem with appropriate boundaries, attachment, and a dangerous level of impulsivity.
I think it’s entirely possible for a sex worker and client to transition to a healthy romantic relationship, but it’s rare and doesn’t happen when it starts off like this.
There’s no way that this doesn’t end up a disaster. No functional relationship starts with a sex worker fucking you bareback on the second booking and without your consent.
Back away from this, go get an STBBI test, and exercise better judgement and boundaries if you’re going to continue seeing (other) sex workers.
My first thought was that she is tired of her work and is looking for somebody who can financially support her while she only has to have sex with him. Is there a possibility she is really into you? Sure but it is a much small possibility than my first suggestion, having such feelings for a person she barely knows at her age (I mean not a hormonal teenager who sees any sort of attraction as true love) seems unlikely
Ask her why her ex and his families feelings are more important to her than yours?
My best friend and I are both straight. We call each other babe or love. If we're watching a move we'll lean on each other or one of will lay down with our head on the others leg. Putting our arm around the other isn't uncommon either. We're both affectionate people by nature. There's nothing sexual about it. It's just us being comfortable with each other. Every friendship is different. I don't think what they were doing is proof they are more than friends. If you want to know sit down and talk to them.
It’s not clear she pays for the groceries. She says she has it “covered” whatever that means. Maybe she just does the shopping and organisation.
“Everything is great except this big red flag he waves while fetishising my (non-existent) virginity.” Girl if you think he’ll break up with you over this your relationship isn’t based on the right things.
That’s a good point. I should avoid that altogether. The loss of spark is the better way to go
I can't even imagine. Its sounds terrifying being at his place then the sudden violence. But how would debating his gameplan or repeat behavior help you?
12 hours is nothing, he's probably just busy
I’d like to address the fact that you remotely considered that it was possible to use it on yourself (I know your saying you’re not going to do that). You should NEVER mix up vaginal and anal toys. This would cause a massive vaginal infection for her. I shudder at the problems/suffering that would cause.
How old are your kids
Do you often defend your attackers?
You need better standards for a best friend. Seriously.
That wasn’t assault dude. Don’t let the overreactionary dumbasses tell you that. She consented, she just thought she’d win. You taught her a naked lesson, but maybe it’ll save her life someday.
This is a clear case that you need to shut this down. Usually these stories are just normal friends stuff but this goes way beyond. He’s been turned down multiple times. Does he think that this woman will decide on his birthday to start liking him? I’d be pissed. Naked no.
This is hilarious really.
Then op can contest that in court, which i believe he will. That doesn’t make her a bad person. She probably wants to go far away to avoid pain so she doesn’t have to see op and his son and have to deal with his constant badgering about getting back together
I’m thinking he is or wants to cheat with her
She is cheating and gaslighting
I also found the fact that she had sex and then went on a date with you quite cold. I mean, even if you were not exclusive, she had sex and then kissed you right after it's a lack of respect and care.
He fell in love with and loves what you look like now. He's sad that you cannot see how beautiful you are without surgery. I hope you get some counseling before you do this. If you have an underlying problem with your looks/body you won't be happier after surgery, and will keep finding things you want to change. I have a friend who is doing that right now. So far she's been unhappy with some aspect of everything she's had done. I hope that doesn't happen to you. You will definitely lose him if you can't even learn to love yourself and appreciate the person he loves: which is you, right now, as you are.
I felt like this before my husband died. He was disabled in a car accident and I had to take care of him after that. After a few years, he passed away.
I live! with an incredible amount of guilt because of how burt out I felt when I was taking care of him, and now I miss him every day.
Yes. A fairly good friend. At the time, we were all coworkers (not anymore), so it was kind of a secret and explains why we didn’t talk about it then.
If you're both dedicated to fixing and commiting to this relationship, have the patience and take things slow, start from square one
My brain just exploded. I'm done for the day.
It sounds like this relationship has come to a natural conclusion. There's nothing wrong with ending things if you're unhappy.
The fact you dread going home says it all to me. Time to move on.
Thank you, I really didn’t mean to and feel terrible about it — she uses my iPad and it was open on there.
This is what I needed to hear but struggled telling myself. I got into a whole rabbit hole of it being an emotional affair etc
There is a world of difference between “someone else” and “the ex I have lied to you in order to spend time with”. Wow. NTA
I wouldn't even bother with that. Just block her and move on.
I wouldn’t give her the opportunity to try to poison dad against the kid, maybe make dad think you’re going to tell some huge lie to cover up some horrible thing you did
You may not have known better as a kid, but you do now. Tell him, if nothing else but to unburden yourself of this secret that was never yours to keep in the first place. As a Dad I think the thought that you have to carry this around and the negative effect it has had and is having on you will affect him a lot more than what your mom has done.
Yeah, when I was pregnant I would’ve been over the moon to be brought yummy edible treats, especially as I’m assuming they’re not readily avail where SIL is if you’re taking them to her!
I’m sorry you didn’t see this side of him before you married him – this seems to happen often as I’ve seen it so many times on Reddit! I hope you can work things out OP, but honestly, I’m angry on your behalf. What an AH. Only you can say if this was a one off or if this is his norm.
It's insane to me that this happened and everyone is berating him. If the genders were switched everyone would be telling him to run.
This might be an unpopular opinion here but I think 4 days is plenty of time for her to decide if she wants a relationship with you. You should ask.
Well start by not having sex with her. You need to distant yourself to get over a crush/infatuation.
Leave him. Don't let anyone bully you into a sexual relationship you don't want. This is a him thing it's not you at all. The fact that he's threatening you means he knows full well is not something you want. Even if you cave you won't be happy, and he knows he can keep pushing, and pretty soon, he will be doing whatever he wants because you'll say yes, so it will never be called cheating.
Ok, but you still didn’t answer. And here’s a twist: I’m a divorce attorney. Before that, I was a counselor. We know for an absolute fact that statistically men do not do anywhere close to equal household chores. Of course some do, but factually most do not. I know after doing this work for 30 years that this builds exhaustion, resentment, and yes stress eating. I also know factually that men grossly underestimate the physical and hormonal changes that come with pregnancy, child birth and breastfeeding. So rather that get defensive, go clean the house too to bottom. Then arrange for a sitter (do not ask her to do it for you) for a half day this weekend. Then plan a date that SHE would enjoy. Dinner and a movie? A picnic at a local park? A concert? Whatever. Then make a promise that you are personally going to do all of this at minimum once a month. Yes, the deep cleaning, arranging for the sitter and the date.
Then when she is feeling a bit more confident, ask her what works for her. An evening walk together as a family? You taking baby responsibilities for an hour every evening so she can do her own thing? It’s about her health and well being, and that’s how you approach it. Or I’ll likely see you or someone like you in my office.
I think your problem is probably not setting the mood correctly. Just think of some romantic gestures. You say you do everything to please her, can you elaborate?
Oh boy a stage 5 clinger.
Girl he was still checking to see if he could get you to come running.
Just block him and move on.
Based on your comments that, you don't want to be with someone who wants to be with someone else. My advice would be to fully lean into it.
Tell your husband, “Do you want to break up and divorce me so you can be with your friend guilt free?”
I have a feeling that you need to see for yourself how he responds to something like that.
Tons of red flags. I don't there will be a good outcome either way
You DEFINITELY need to talk to him about this and nip this in the bud. It's unacceptable behavior. Rejection happens and it never feels great, but he cannot be taking that out on you. At best, he has trouble regulating his emotions when he feels rejected and needs to work on that. At worst, he's attempting to manipulate you into just doing it anyways. Neither of those things are conducive to a healthy relationship.
His response when you bring this up will also tell you plenty.
I thought snapchat was for kids?
Is he jerking off a lot? Before I got with my gf, i was going at it multiple times a day and as a result wasn't always able to easily get naked when she initiated. Lowered the frequency of solo time and now it's much easier for us to be ready at the same time on a short notice. Best of luck to y'all
Sex in general. He’s divorced and he told me he had this issue when he was married too.
Just let her go if she actually wants to break up with you over something so incredibly ridiculous.
Well, that I understand. Totally. Best recommendation then is to make sure that you communicate how you’re feeling. Let her know that when you express how you’re feeling, and you’re met with defensiveness, it makes it difficult to be open and tell her how you’re feeling to find a resolution. Then, when you address something with her make sure you aren’t phrasing it in a “you did this” type of way. For example, instead of saying you never do the dishes and I always have to do it. It’s better to say I feel like I spend a lot of time doing the dishes and it would really alleviate some of my stress if you could help me with that once in a while.
This is where my mind went to.
If it's been 5yrs and he still doesn't get it, he never will.
Go ahead and report me. You are a cheater and obviously can't handle being called one.
i didn’t know if to give it to your or not lol
This stood out to me. People are arguing over whether or not giving someone a flower is a romantic gesture. They are missing the fact that that the friend clearly thought it could be interpreted that way, and did it anyway. It's possible it was at worst casual flirting and she would never go any farther. The problem is she is knowingly skirting a line, and your boyfriend isn't comfortable with it.
The question is, do you want a boundary in your relationship where you and your partner are both OK with casual flirting with friends who are potential romantic partners. Yes is a perfectly fine answer, but your bf clearly doesn't want that, and he's not wrong for that either.
Please drop this controlling AH!