Do you were drunk and passed out? Woke up to someone on top of you? That sounds like rape… Did you frame it to your husband as a consensual drunken hook up? Was it consensual but something you regretted the next day? Or was it nonconsensual?
If you didn't give consent, verbally or otherwise, then it was rape. You should let your husband know this. Sorry op
I think Someone's been giving you the wrong kinda guidance or advice, or your comparison monkey is cutting loose.
At any point in life there are a few #1 priorities that just – ARE. Till they aren't.
See how that works?
Nor do you have to get it right – there rarely is enough information to make all the right decisions – otherwise the decisions would be automatic.
And beyond the #1 priorities – everything that you did – was the best choice you could make under the circumstances.
If you grew in career but not in romance, you made that choice.
And if you think you missed out, so now have to make up for what you missed, you might just be trading career ambition for “making up” ambition.
Which simply means you will repeat 16 to 27 but in a lesser degree.
I think you have to accept yourself first and your life so far. Everything else comes next.
Do you were drunk and passed out? Woke up to someone on top of you? That sounds like rape… Did you frame it to your husband as a consensual drunken hook up? Was it consensual but something you regretted the next day? Or was it nonconsensual?
If you didn't give consent, verbally or otherwise, then it was rape. You should let your husband know this. Sorry op