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Date: December 1, 2022
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I don’t think she „used your son to get back at you“. Again, she was vulnerable, full of hormones and, while this should have been a happy experience, she had to deal with the thought you have cheated on her.
I understand your feelings, as this is your child, too, but maybe this was less about hurting you and more about protecting herself. She probably just needed some time, which she didn’t have as she was about to pop, and therefore made some decisions she wouldn’t have made had she not been highly pregnant.
You feel like she took something from you, but you also took something from her, even though not willingly. Your poor choices led to that situation. Why on earth did you hook up with someone right after you broke up with your girlfriend? And why did this girl contact your pregnant girlfriend?
She shouldn’t have had to deal with something like that. Did she overreact? Probably. Is it understandable, given the context? Absolutely.
How about you both forgive each other and find a way to be family now, instead of holding resentment? You have a child together, you should be happy and make plans for the future. You can’t change what happened, but since you both made questionable decisions at some point, i wouldn’t try to find out who’s more guilty but rather see what’s best for your son.
Well I have cut her off. This happened near the end of our friendship… I told her I needed some time after that & she eventually said, “you’ve had enough time.”
I also let myself get into another argument with her and went to the hospital to check myself in for fear of hurting myself. I wasn’t even seen by a doctor when she messaged my family member creating a false narrative of me & then she blew up my phone again… not to ask how I was, but to argue with me more and prove her point, knowing I was in the hospital. She tried to dictate that she “had nothing to do with it”, but how can you tell someone WHY they went into the hospital.. who would know better?
But the friendship is over.
If this is real then you need to wake up.
Quickly.
How many red flags will it take?
You will be disappointed and sad at first because you had some good moments in the relationship and she ruined it by choosing her friend over you.
But the upside to all of this is way more valuable than the relationship with her. Because all of the bad times where she ALLOWED her friend to bully you will far outweigh any good that was had in the relationship.
You did everything you could. You did what most people couldn’t do and stood up for yourself. It sounds like you have a decent job and a stable life. Your have self worth, and no bully, ex gf, or anyone else can say otherwise.
You will look back on this and realize the BULLET that you dodged. You almost gave your life to a person that didn’t love you enough to stick up for you. Accept her for who she truly is, a person that chooses a toxic friend over everyone else, accept her for her flaws, and move on.
You should not have kept your mouth shut. Had you done that. You’d have had the same outcome, accept you’d have felt pathetic for not sticking up for yourself when you had the chance.
You are a strong person. You’ve taken a big step toward loving yourself. You deserve better from a girlfriend.