But your husband is not being unsupportive, he's being realistic. He's acknowledging that if the two of you make this difficult then Rose and Sage will cut you off, and Lilly may also do so in support. If that happens you don't have to worry about having two children dating because you won't have any children at all.
I understand your desire for validation and you're right, this is f**King weird, but all the validation from redditors will not stop your kids from cutting you out of their lives. Your husband and the rest of your family are not wrong for prioritising their relationship with Rose and Sage over being mortified that they're dating.
Who made you sign? That's a big hell no. Don't sign anything without knowing full well what you're getting into in the future.
A good lawyer can probably get you out of that, as it sounds like you were pressured, and you legally aren't entitled to anything either the house. So it makes no sense that you'd have to sign anything house related.
This is a huge problem though, and he won't show you his statements? Time to end this one.
You're 28 dude. Grow TF up and quit stringing her along. Just asking you to propose isn't “pressure” and you need to be honest that you're not planning on doing it.
Financial infidelity is a thing. This would 100% be my hill to die on.
I wonder if there was an insurance claim and they paid out, but the work wasn’t actually paid for, that would be insurance fraud on top of the contractor suing… definitely time for a lawyer.
Not if it’s an established friend and nothing inappropriate was going on. People are allowed to have friends. If he wasn’t doing anything wrong there’s no reason why he needs to be upset or guilty.
“I know I am part of the reason they got divorced”
So….the mistress is surprised that she hasn't “won” a prize in this upstanding gentleman. You reap what you sow. Deal with it. He abandoned his kids and family for you. Did you really think he'd be a knight in shining armour for you?
Yikes. Tough situation because of the fact that one of them is your roommate. If not, I'd just stop being friends with the girl and the roommate and just tell my best friend.
Your best friend will also come to dislike you if he ends up knowing that you knew and never told him. Just claim you don't know and find a new roomate I suppose.
I always told him she’s ok and she’s cool and I don’t mind them following each other and I don’t mind her commenting since she comments on his friends’ posts as well. So it’s all good.
He's just sitting on the couch one day and you walk up to him and say “Hey it's okay that you follow that person”?
How does this “always” come up in the first place?
Because if you brought it up apropos of nothing, he probably realized you are very insecure about her.
You might have Routines, quirks and preferences in regards to your livingsutuations that just don't match, so it's VERY important to on-line together for some time before marriage (imo it's the same with having sex)
It's not a necessity, there are people who only move in together years after being married and they work out, but personally I would always move in together before getting married, otherwise you might, in the worst case, find out living together doesn't work after marriage and that's a LOT of paperwork to go through.
I get why you might feel weird about his statement but I can totally understand his point if view.
For example, my ex always smoked inside, I don't smoke. For the one day I stayed at his place a week that was fine, but constantly living with someone who smokes inside would not have worked out in the long run, I thought I could propably manage, but after spending just one week in a house where people constantly smoke inside (and next to me), I knew it would never have worked out
Start getting ready for a divorce. She has no respect for you if she lies to your face. How can you trust her? You are lying to yourself if you think she told you the truth about nothing happening. If she won't give you straight answers get them out of him.
I mean, your guy is a coward, which is a really unattractive quality in a man. Maybe he should go take some self-defense classes? Idk, ai would just bail, for real.
My wife elbowed me just this morning in my nose and in my eye because I kept trying to bite her hips. I laughed it off. She felt bad. Tell him to stop acting like a little bitch.
Yes – it's called dump the abusive chump and get a new boyfriend. He doesn't love or respect you. Quite frankly YOU deserve someone who actually loves & respects your feelings/boundries
This is why you don't sleep with friends you intend on keeping around. If she had a position of I am uncomfortable with you being close with people you slept with or sleep with when single, she would be in the majority. If she had a group of guy friends that she had slept with would you be okay with her spending 1:1 time with them?
He’s a rude, drunken naked mess (why tdid you even get on the bike with him?) and you’re worried about how to communicate disappointment? Your priorities are confused.
I was not attentive, cold, in her words she didn’t feel loved. Probably enough to end the relationship there instead of attempt an act of “getting my attention”.
ugh a good friend of mine just had the same thing happen to him. His gf invited him to a party then said the party was cancelled but it wasn't, she just went without him. It really, really hurt the poor dudes feelings. and as it turns out his girlfriend was in the process of breaking up with him just didn't have the nerve to tell him.
I hope that's not the case for you but there's really no good reason for him to do that.
I’d first be asking that if you were holding a friends phone, and so chick was texting and your wife saw, how would she react? Would she sleep on the couch?
You know what's wild about Texas?! The income threshold to qualify for food stamps is lower in spite of the cost of living being so much lower! I couldn't believe it when i realized. My utilities are in fact less than yours, but like whatever. I have to pay maintenance fees every month on an apartment i own lol.
Well if you want an FWB, there you go. If you want anything more, move on. You might get to be her “boyfriend”, but you'll have a life of hiding your relationship from her friends and family. Personally, I wouldn't want that and would just hook up with her knowing there was no future. She's in the marriage for her reasons. You're in no place to get in the middle of that. You can decide what you want to do. It seems David is on board with you and Gina hooking up though.
Divorce and date on the days he has her, it's really the only thing to do. She told him she doesn't want to share him and he “picked her” and is now using her, and probably lying to her claiming that you're already going through the process of said divorce. Why do you want to remain in a marriage with someone like this? He doesn't care about you or your daughters, or the new woman who he is also cheating on
If he was acting this way toward a 17 year old girl who just got her license, it would not be tolerated.
If it was a doctor that acted this way toward one of his patients, it would not be tolerated.
So why is this being tolerated?
And of course, what if this escalates and he starts showing up in person or peeping thru her window in the middle of the night?
?♂️
There is no reason to tolerate this…
I don't know how to resolve it safely, but I am sure others on here can offer good advice on regards to that.
But your husband is not being unsupportive, he's being realistic. He's acknowledging that if the two of you make this difficult then Rose and Sage will cut you off, and Lilly may also do so in support. If that happens you don't have to worry about having two children dating because you won't have any children at all.
I understand your desire for validation and you're right, this is f**King weird, but all the validation from redditors will not stop your kids from cutting you out of their lives. Your husband and the rest of your family are not wrong for prioritising their relationship with Rose and Sage over being mortified that they're dating.
why do you care now? After all the s****y comments you gave me..
Listen, let her go. If she can’t show you compassion for what you’re going thru and work thru this with you, she’s not the one.
My only advice is to not have private conversation on the phone
Coat-hanger Flight Beach New snatch
Then evaluate how you feel lol
Came here to say this.
Bahaha stop being so melodramatic. Put your phone down and go outside. Get some sunlight and fresh air. ??
Off and on for 4 years. click off
You don't like that kind of clickbait content and feel uncomfortable participating in it, so nah you didn't do anything wrong in my opinion.
Start talking to your family and friends. About all of it. Don't shelter or protect her from their opinions.
Want to know what is worse than 7 years in a bad relationship? 7 years and one day…
Who made you sign? That's a big hell no. Don't sign anything without knowing full well what you're getting into in the future.
A good lawyer can probably get you out of that, as it sounds like you were pressured, and you legally aren't entitled to anything either the house. So it makes no sense that you'd have to sign anything house related.
This is a huge problem though, and he won't show you his statements? Time to end this one.
You're 28 dude. Grow TF up and quit stringing her along. Just asking you to propose isn't “pressure” and you need to be honest that you're not planning on doing it.
Financial infidelity is a thing. This would 100% be my hill to die on.
I wonder if there was an insurance claim and they paid out, but the work wasn’t actually paid for, that would be insurance fraud on top of the contractor suing… definitely time for a lawyer.
This is one of my favorite answers ever. VERY well stated.
Not if it’s an established friend and nothing inappropriate was going on. People are allowed to have friends. If he wasn’t doing anything wrong there’s no reason why he needs to be upset or guilty.
I believe the statute of limitations for child sex crimes has just been eliminated (woohoo!)
“I know I am part of the reason they got divorced”
So….the mistress is surprised that she hasn't “won” a prize in this upstanding gentleman. You reap what you sow. Deal with it. He abandoned his kids and family for you. Did you really think he'd be a knight in shining armour for you?
Well she's now saying she's happy for the bride and has stopped calling her bad marriage material, unless I've missed a comment :/
I agree, especially about changing all his contact info.
Did your ex husband end up giving you everything? E.g. house and money?
He deserves better than you and you should be single for a long time.
Yikes. Tough situation because of the fact that one of them is your roommate. If not, I'd just stop being friends with the girl and the roommate and just tell my best friend.
Your best friend will also come to dislike you if he ends up knowing that you knew and never told him. Just claim you don't know and find a new roomate I suppose.
Do you believe these things, or do you just believe that some people think these things?
We have been broken up for 6 months but have been on/off during that time. It has been 2 months since I cut him off. Hopefully that makes sense ?
I always told him she’s ok and she’s cool and I don’t mind them following each other and I don’t mind her commenting since she comments on his friends’ posts as well. So it’s all good.
He's just sitting on the couch one day and you walk up to him and say “Hey it's okay that you follow that person”?
How does this “always” come up in the first place?
Because if you brought it up apropos of nothing, he probably realized you are very insecure about her.
Living together can make or break a relationship.
You might have Routines, quirks and preferences in regards to your livingsutuations that just don't match, so it's VERY important to on-line together for some time before marriage (imo it's the same with having sex)
It's not a necessity, there are people who only move in together years after being married and they work out, but personally I would always move in together before getting married, otherwise you might, in the worst case, find out living together doesn't work after marriage and that's a LOT of paperwork to go through.
I get why you might feel weird about his statement but I can totally understand his point if view.
For example, my ex always smoked inside, I don't smoke. For the one day I stayed at his place a week that was fine, but constantly living with someone who smokes inside would not have worked out in the long run, I thought I could propably manage, but after spending just one week in a house where people constantly smoke inside (and next to me), I knew it would never have worked out
Start getting ready for a divorce. She has no respect for you if she lies to your face. How can you trust her? You are lying to yourself if you think she told you the truth about nothing happening. If she won't give you straight answers get them out of him.
I mean, your guy is a coward, which is a really unattractive quality in a man. Maybe he should go take some self-defense classes? Idk, ai would just bail, for real.
I hate that I have but one upvote to give to your response.
I cant imagine a more traumatic or difficult situation for people to be in. I wish you and your wife all the best.
Consider seeking some counselling yourself too. I can't even think about how I could start to process something like that.
The lack of reasoning in this comment is proof we descended from monkeys.
My wife elbowed me just this morning in my nose and in my eye because I kept trying to bite her hips. I laughed it off. She felt bad. Tell him to stop acting like a little bitch.
I assume her mother is IN Korea. If she is, take her there and leave her with her mother. Let her mother figure it out.
He’s gaslighting the fuck outta you. Also, vaginas do not work like that.
Yes – it's called dump the abusive chump and get a new boyfriend. He doesn't love or respect you. Quite frankly YOU deserve someone who actually loves & respects your feelings/boundries
This is why you don't sleep with friends you intend on keeping around. If she had a position of I am uncomfortable with you being close with people you slept with or sleep with when single, she would be in the majority. If she had a group of guy friends that she had slept with would you be okay with her spending 1:1 time with them?
He’s a rude, drunken naked mess (why tdid you even get on the bike with him?) and you’re worried about how to communicate disappointment? Your priorities are confused.
Someone telling you they're trying to make you jealous isn't a red flag, that's a fucking deal breaker.
This has malpractice and pervert written all over it. You’re being manipulated. Please leave that old man.
I was not attentive, cold, in her words she didn’t feel loved. Probably enough to end the relationship there instead of attempt an act of “getting my attention”.
No no no no NO!
ugh a good friend of mine just had the same thing happen to him. His gf invited him to a party then said the party was cancelled but it wasn't, she just went without him. It really, really hurt the poor dudes feelings. and as it turns out his girlfriend was in the process of breaking up with him just didn't have the nerve to tell him.
I hope that's not the case for you but there's really no good reason for him to do that.
OH! Okay. I understand. Thank you. So would you suggest I talk to him and maybe just keep doing what I’ve been doing?
Leave him. Block them both. Don't take him back. Heal. Move forward.
Hope that is all he was there for 🙁
She already knows. Who would be this dense?
ESPECIALLY since she went to his house multiple times
I’d first be asking that if you were holding a friends phone, and so chick was texting and your wife saw, how would she react? Would she sleep on the couch?
You really wrote out a red flag catalog and find yourself wanting to stay? What about any of this makes you want to marry this woman?
You know what's wild about Texas?! The income threshold to qualify for food stamps is lower in spite of the cost of living being so much lower! I couldn't believe it when i realized. My utilities are in fact less than yours, but like whatever. I have to pay maintenance fees every month on an apartment i own lol.
Well if you want an FWB, there you go. If you want anything more, move on. You might get to be her “boyfriend”, but you'll have a life of hiding your relationship from her friends and family. Personally, I wouldn't want that and would just hook up with her knowing there was no future. She's in the marriage for her reasons. You're in no place to get in the middle of that. You can decide what you want to do. It seems David is on board with you and Gina hooking up though.
Divorce and date on the days he has her, it's really the only thing to do. She told him she doesn't want to share him and he “picked her” and is now using her, and probably lying to her claiming that you're already going through the process of said divorce. Why do you want to remain in a marriage with someone like this? He doesn't care about you or your daughters, or the new woman who he is also cheating on
The guy who beat you up is the love of your life?