There is an excellent reason why he was single at 40 and you have learned that.
Firstly, he is paying for the house already. You need to leave. It is in his interests to put the house in his name.
Secondly, you have purchased much of the furniture. That is coming with you (you may need to stretch yourself a bit more.l temporarily hire some storage). You will have the credit card receipts to show ownership. He can buy it all off you at a very reasonable price- IE what you are likely to be able to sell it for, or it comes with you into storage and you sell it. That won't pay your debts but it will knock them down a bit
Thirdly, look to online in your means. Can you sell the car for instance to eliminate that payment? Or is it essential for your job or the payments higher than you could sell it for?
Fourthly, do you have any support network nearby? Parents, family or friends? You will need them for a while.
Fifth- steel yourself and maintain your resolve. Do not be open to any persuasion on this. You are 100% correct; you have to leave this relationship. This man will die old, miserable and alone because that is all he is fit for. He will fall out with his children when they are adults because they will see him for the pointless, self centered individual he is, and every relationship he has will fail like they always have so far because he is not fit for any human partnership.
Noatree what he says to you, there is zero future in this relationship. You have to get out of it and any pain you suffer financially to do so is worth it. This guy will only get worse; and crucially, so will your self esteem and barometer of what you deserve in a relationship
Look… the think about feelings and dating… they're confusing if you're in a position that is enabling the confusion.
You don't need to tip-toe around things and wonder “does this mean he likes me?”… we can't tell that to you.
Be forward and get that information from him. Don't involve yourself in situations that feel like a game. Do you want to play games with your heart? No…
The best way to protect yourself is going after clear cut, no brainer information.
Should I try to move on? Delete thousands of messages and photos from my phone and social media, and rid my self of things that make me hold on so I can heal?
Yes.
The unfortunate reality is most relationships that start in your teens do not last.
The thing that makes me mad for you is that she didn't even have the decency to talk to you and let you know what she was feeling. Also, the not coming home is a strong indication she's been spending the night with a romantic interest.
Do things for you now. Go out, have fun, make new friends, date, be a young adult.
He’ll only be on the hook for a short while because i imagine they havent been married that long. Alimony isnt a lifetime thing
There is an excellent reason why he was single at 40 and you have learned that.
Firstly, he is paying for the house already. You need to leave. It is in his interests to put the house in his name.
Secondly, you have purchased much of the furniture. That is coming with you (you may need to stretch yourself a bit more.l temporarily hire some storage). You will have the credit card receipts to show ownership. He can buy it all off you at a very reasonable price- IE what you are likely to be able to sell it for, or it comes with you into storage and you sell it. That won't pay your debts but it will knock them down a bit
Thirdly, look to online in your means. Can you sell the car for instance to eliminate that payment? Or is it essential for your job or the payments higher than you could sell it for?
Fourthly, do you have any support network nearby? Parents, family or friends? You will need them for a while.
Fifth- steel yourself and maintain your resolve. Do not be open to any persuasion on this. You are 100% correct; you have to leave this relationship. This man will die old, miserable and alone because that is all he is fit for. He will fall out with his children when they are adults because they will see him for the pointless, self centered individual he is, and every relationship he has will fail like they always have so far because he is not fit for any human partnership.
Noatree what he says to you, there is zero future in this relationship. You have to get out of it and any pain you suffer financially to do so is worth it. This guy will only get worse; and crucially, so will your self esteem and barometer of what you deserve in a relationship
Yeah that’s really concerning and sad as a society how uneducated people many people are, especially in regard to getting pregnant due to not knowing.
Look… the think about feelings and dating… they're confusing if you're in a position that is enabling the confusion.
You don't need to tip-toe around things and wonder “does this mean he likes me?”… we can't tell that to you.
Be forward and get that information from him. Don't involve yourself in situations that feel like a game. Do you want to play games with your heart? No…
The best way to protect yourself is going after clear cut, no brainer information.
Should I try to move on? Delete thousands of messages and photos from my phone and social media, and rid my self of things that make me hold on so I can heal?
Yes.
The unfortunate reality is most relationships that start in your teens do not last.
The thing that makes me mad for you is that she didn't even have the decency to talk to you and let you know what she was feeling. Also, the not coming home is a strong indication she's been spending the night with a romantic interest.
Do things for you now. Go out, have fun, make new friends, date, be a young adult.