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play with tits [111 tokens remaining]
Date: October 2, 2022
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Bro, Same thing I experienced.. From my experience you have to end this relationship now. Because she will eventually leave you or cheat you. If you end this.. you might get hurt. but You will recover. But when she leave you, will not recover. So, please end this relationship.
I just downvote these posts as they don’t deserve to be taken seriously. If they can’t use punctuation, they can’t put any effort into a relationship.
Stop asking about who he's attracted to. My bf came out as bi within our monogamous 6+ year relationship. He's stayed loyal to me, and, while I do know his type of man, it's not something I press him about because I simply do not want to think of him with anyone but me.
Consider that it isn't him being bi itself that's the issue, rather maybe it's an insecurity within yourself as you fear you cannot compete with men in this instance.
Stop asking about what he finds attractive, think about how he's stayed by your side even when you thought he was attracted to half of the population.. Why would it change now?
I admittedly had a difficult time with it initially when my bf came out, but it was something he needed to do for him. As stated we've been together for 6+ years. He came out a couple of years ago and literally nothing has changed between us. He is just more happy and at peace with himself. He never stepped out or anything.
There's all sorts of weird feelings behind this stuff that no one wants to admit or can. One could assume coming out now is an excuse to be hypersexual outside of your relationship, but I am here to say that it's more likely that this is something your bf has been struggling with for awhile and just being himself and sharing himself with you is the goal here.
If he has no plans to “act” on his attractions and has never given you reason to think he's unfaithful then truly nothing has changed, he is merely more vulnerable with you.
Am I crazy for thinking that the only reason he would feel the need to hide it is because he has feelings for her?
No, you're not.
Break up and sue for damages. You don't need this
He didn’t mention it before today. He just refused to bring me the wipes from the other room when I needed them then when I asked why, he gave his reasons
I so sorry, OP
Going through the same issue. No trust
So you're friends with someone who doesn't respect your relationship and is basically a homewrecker? Alright, says a lot about your moral values as well.
Just break up with your girlfriend if you want to, I have a feeling she kind of deserves better than this. Of course, you deserve something that also makes you happy if you feel that you're unhappy with her.
It's Reddit, what did you expect? Lol
Someone had to say it lol
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Worm eggs ripe for the picking got me ? oh god the images in my mind, I wish I didn’t have such a vivid imagination
Tough love can be really effective, I agree, but this doesn’t feel like the right time for it. OP seems reasonable enough, just really manipulated and fearful, which I think is understandable given their current situation. To each our own, though!
I myself and Jewish and agnostic, but I’m so so with you that in any iteration of God I’ve heard of, God has been a source of hope and justice and is big on doing the right thing. The versions of Jesus I’ve heard of would NEVER be okay with the way OP’s husband is acting. I’ve met some recovering Christians though, and there’s a lot of internal work to be done to rewrite their ideas on how one should live! their life. As long as OP can remove herself and her child from this community, I have hope that she’ll get the clarity she needs to heal.
I don’t think you’re being insensitive but I’ve no idea if you’re partner is being manipulative. They’re certainly not being direct however.
Your partner is basically saying they are insecure and don’t trust you, and that they don’t want you to have anything whatsoever to do with anyone you have had any sort of relationship with, even if it was just casual.
For me, this would be a deal breaker, but it’s up to you what sort of restrictions you’re willing to accept from a partner.
Congratulations you got your Christmas gift 🙂
Alcohol should never be scapegoated as the direct cause of infidelity because it isn't. All it does is dull your inner filter and inhibitions in order to bring your underlying desires to the forefront. “I can't drink because it makes me want to kiss random girls, oopsie!” That's not how any of this works….
>the force he uses ends up hurting me >the back of my throat ached for days >he was so unable to stop touching my body >I felt really anxious >made me so uncomfortable
Read back what you're writing OP, this is all pretty sad. He's 30 years old, this is awful, frankly.
Thank you, I think that’s really beautiful.
You’re not understanding it because it’s drivel. There’s no deep wisdom, he’s throwing words against the wall (and making some up along the way) and trying to appear insightful.
You can care a lot for someone without being in love with them. It is really nude to break up with someone you care for because you feel like a terrible person for hurting them. Just like you wouldn’t want to make your friend sad.
It’s absolutely not your responsibility to help her with that tho.
To make it easier for both of you cut contact while you focus on healing.
You have absolutely zero social intelligence ?
Also to add the psychological aspect of things. You can tell from her post that she has been mentally/emotionally beaten down by this man for the entirety of their relationship, to the point that she is questioning her sanity and perfectly rational/normal feelings. It becomes that much harder to leave when someone is ensuring you have zero self-esteem.
He doesn't respect you. Men in their 30's and 40's are not trying to date a 25 year old because they “respect them” so much. Try therapy to work on your daddy issues instead of constantly complaining on Reddit about your failed relationships.
As I stated in the first post , is an opinion. I gave my opinion and people can do what they want with it. Just saying im happy this way
It will probably jeopardize your marriage tbh.
Sounds like he is 'trying' to spice it up:
Lately he has been trying to be sexy and I can't help but laugh (most of the time internally).
But, according to you, failing on the execution. He is coming out of his shell and if you replied “Hey, I want to sex with this guy on the internet”… that will probably create a lot of damage.
Maybe, you should close the door on the rp'ing with other people in general. You were given some sexual freedom, and now you're taking it too far by developing a desire to sleep with someone.
Here's the thing…. he doesn't turn you on how you like. He's inexperienced. So, you should be building that inexperience up… you know, like coaching him.
With you having that outlet to rp live!, you're choosing to use other people to satisfy your needs instead of improving the one in front of you. Its sort of the same concept of someone choosing porn instead of their partner.
Stop the rp'ing. Eliminate all sexual desires that do not include him. Improve your sexual chemistry. And maybe you will find proper resolution and develop a more fulfilling reletionship out of it.
No
Nothing
Nope completely justified.
Maybe she will take notice and change her behaviour so people in the future don’t hate her.
Good.
And this is something that I had to learn for myself. My relationship with my ex-girlfriend and didn't pretty tragic fashion. I'm not going to get into details but she cheated, someone showed me pictures of the event, I gave her the opportunity to tell me, and she lied. And then tried to blame it on the other people.
I was so angry at her that it became hatred. It impacted my work, my school work, and even my social skills. And then one day someone who's older than me simply said just forgive her. And since that day it's no longer controlled me.
The link I provided was the 2013 update to the 2005 Stolen Valor Act.
The Stolen Valor Act of 2005, signed into law by President George W. Bush on December 20, 2006, was a U.S. law that broadened the provisions of previous U.S. law addressing the unauthorized wear, manufacture, or sale of any military decorations and medals. The law made it a federal misdemeanor to falsely represent oneself as having received any U.S. military decoration or medal.
Also, while my link was to proposed changes, note that it is called 06/03/2013 Became Public Law No: 113-12.
The Stolen Valor Act of 2013 (Pub. L. 113–12 (text) (PDF); H.R. 258) is a United States federal law that was passed by the 113th United States Congress. The law amends the federal criminal code to make it a crime for a person to fraudulently claim having received a valor award specified in the Act, with the intention of obtaining money, property, or other tangible benefit by convincing another that he or she received the award.
Notice that the above paragraph refers to Public Law 113-12 (the same as the link I originally cited) and that it was indeed passed by the 113th US Congress. The bill was signed into law by President Barack Obama on June 3, 2013.
Yes, the original law was challenged and struck down by the Supreme Court that cited “free speech”, which is what led to the revision of the law in 2013. However, the ruling specified that the individual in the cases referenced did not have criminal intent, thus, ruled on the side of free speech.
The (2013) law is a revised version of a previous statute with roughly the same name that had been struck down by the Supreme Court of the United States in United States v. Alvarez. In that case, the Supreme Court ruled the arrest and prosecution of a citizen for wearing and claiming to have received unearned military awards, who did so without criminal intent, under the 2005 law violates their constitutional right to freedom of speech.
Basically, the revision in the 2013 law clarified due to the Supreme Court ruling that the individual has to have criminal intent as the SC ruling specifically cites “who did so without criminal intent”.
You need to talk to him to see if his request for 1x/week was a one-off or something he wants regularly. It's possible he has outstanding factors like work, family, etc draining him of his social battery. But if this ends up being an ongoing thing, you should call it quits as this is incompatible in the long term.
Unfortunately Reddit isn’t allowing me to read some of the earlier comments. But I will try my best to respond to all of you. Again I appreciate everyone for taking the time out your day to leave your thoughts , best advice , kind words. Everything! Right now I’m in bed snuggled with my teddy bear watching Hulu and eating snacks?
Yea but I also said “partnered” like a long term partnership. It’s not something you do because it’s financially better off. It should always be with intention (whatever that intention is).
If they're not ready to move in together, they shouldn't be getting married either. Imagine if you had married your ex before living together only to see that you can't live! together.
I look almost exactly like my father's mother. Genetics are crazy!!
That made me laugh but also I feel like that is so true
If you do want to address this with him, I think you should try meet up with him outside of work to talk about it. Reply to his text and say something like “no, I'm not ok. Mutual friend told me everything you said to her and I'm disappointed that you'd tell her those things instead of me when it was you & I that had the experience. I wish you had given me the opportunity to hear these things from you first, rather than filtered through mutual friend. I would like to meet up and discuss this face to face”
Relationships are partnerships. If he wants to impose rules that only apply to you, you know that’s not normal or fair. Your last line so casually thrown in there absolutely killed me. This is not normal, the relationship is too new, and you’re too mature to put up with this. Kick him to the curb.
Yeah, and OP's problem is how she can't help to feel about this whole situation. So she's asking for advice. She's not asking to be interrogated or to have the validity of her or her mom's experience questioned and picked apart by strangers.
I’m not skinny myself and I feel your pain when I get played around. I talked with a girl on bumble for a year during lockdown and after a year of getting to know her live! i buy Harry Potter on stage tickets in SF. She blocked me and left me hanging.
I had a girl like me and after a month I sent her a photo of what I look like and she was the same size as me. She ghosted me but I got to see on her story about how she flirted with a guy and got his number. Then I got blocked.
I have couple more stories where I get close to the first date and then I get ghosted or stood up.
Just today I have a date from bumble to go to a Vietnamese restaurant and she has yet to tell me an exact time she will be free today on her day off so the anxiety is real racking up but I will give her the chance and wait until she finally responds back.
It happens and you just have to keep trying until you meet someone that likes your personality and physical appearance. If they ghost or stand you up then that’s for the best because they have shitty personality and low maturity to decline properly.
To me it seems like you are. If it affected nothing then why be mad
As someone who was married at 21, we DID talk about this stuff and had mature conversations around children and birth control, etc. But not everyone has those conversations. I tell young people not to rush into marriage, it worked out for me, but that doesn’t mean it’s the right decision for them. ??♀️
Given the period of time you dated and the weirdness of the situation, it's time to move on and drop the whole “let's be friends” thing.
Run.
heartbreak. I've recently had a chat with her about sexual intimacy and it's brought me a lot closer to her. I'm starting to understand that i need to keep investing in improving the relationship to keep the passion alive.
Bypassing the age gap ?♀️?♀️ what do you mean by living in an environment unfit for kids??? You need to explain that one. This is a reason why the relationship won’t work long term. He’s wanting more kids, are you prepared to do this at age 22 when you say you’re bad with kids etc. save yourself the heartbreak and end it.
It is not your responsibility to be in charge of her mental health. You got her professional help. Let her family know the situation and hopefully they will be supportive and help her through this difficult time. Keep her blocked as she is trying to manipulate you into taking her back.
100% sure her grandmother told me it was true and she needed to get her stomach pumped.
Go get him ?
I would drop you as a friend too. Girl bye ?
I'm not the person you were replying to but I'm going to put my two cents in… it doesn't matter if he understands.
He doesn't understand how his actions/reactions make you feel now. He doesn't seem like he wants to do any self reflection to understand how you feel now even tho youve said it numerous times.
It doesn't matter if he understands why you leave him because he is incapable/unwilling to understand what brought you to this decision.
This is Jessica Wakefield level scheming.
Exactly. What a heartless POS… Testing his GF!
Failed with flying colors.
…What ?
he’s bad news. You are 19 , an adult, however, he is a married guy looking for a “side” girl. You are probably not his first affair. I’d suggest he not be your first affair.
Not really lol just don’t be mean to other people.
“Hey, I would like to take a step back from this friendship because I no longer see it as positive or beneficial for me. I wish you all the best”
It matters, because it's a legal and health issue, and it a fundamental physical thing that your partner needs to know. Clearly the fiancée felt she had been lied to, and that this mattered, hence breaking up.
Everything I’m about to say is from the perspective of having lost my father when I was 19.
First of all, I am SO sorry for your loss. It is one of the world’s worst feelings. May your father’s memory be a blessing to you and all he loved.
Second of all, you are about to learn that grief is all consuming. It lives in your soul and your mind and for a while, it will be all that you can hear, see, feel, and touch. It will feel like time is moving (or not moving) in a way it never has before.
But here’s the thing: the earth will keep turning. Life will keep bustling on for everyone around you while you watch from the other side of the glass.
This is all to say that your gf’s life, plans, needs, will all continue to move forward. She was there for you during the service, she was there for you after the trip. She supported you in the ways she could while still tending to her own life, her life that is still moving forward even while you feel like your’s is on hold. You cannot resent her for following through with something that she needed to do, as she did her best to be there for you around it.
Please consider talking to someone professional to process your loss. It is a tremendous burden to carry on your own.
My partner and I have had insanely stupid miscommunications like this multiple times over our relationship.
Communication on any other topic (i.e., feelings, finances etc) are completely fine. But when it comes to time, our communication does not line up.
You may be on to something with your theory.
She's 22. Pretty normal behavior for her age. She broke up with him for a reason. She's enjoying revenge for whatever he did to her by being happy. She's over him, but she's not over her anger. She will get there.
This is highly variable from state to state; my lawyer didn’t paint this picture for me at all.
I wouldn't call the bf a child rape apologist. He was SUPER young when it happened. He's like 10 years younger than his sister. He may not have even been born yet. The parents had all the opportunity to craft a more favorable story and brainwash him into believing it's ok by drilling it into him throughout his entire childhood. And he still lives with them. Of course he won't have come around to realizing that they manipulated him into thinking it's ok. He should move out, whether or not its with her.
Don’t have kids with someone who downplays rape and child abuse
WOW
Thanks for the advice. She says that if I don't follow her rules then I have to go live! somewhere else and I have no where else to. And even though she's so controlling, she's still my mother and I wouldn't turn my back on her
She's love bombing you.
Nope. That sounds hurtful.
I’m so sorry you went through that. You were completely right to communicate your feelings the next morning, and it was wrong of him to gaslight you. My best advice would be to sever the relationship and don’t look back. Seek therapy as well.
I will