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meganlane chat
Date: October 8, 2022
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PleasingMyPussyNow
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If you do not find your gf attractive, the only (and kindest) thing you can do is break up with her. She deserves a partner that desires her, not someone who sees her more as breeding livestock. And you deserve to be with someone you actually like.
Honestly, there's no way to make attraction grow. You either find someone attractive or not. Staying with this person will mean you probably end up cheating on her long term. This is a shitty future for you, her and any kids you end up having. End it and be with someone you actually want to be with.
Appearance can be a sign of effort
Thank you. This is awesome.
This sounds like a Troll with a breeding kink
My wife of 7 years just left me for her work friend she's known less than a month. And I'm not trying to compare the relationships, but if you didn't have a child would you stay?
Yeah – isn't it great that he hasn't felt pressured to do that before he's ready?
Or are you trying to shame someone for not going by your timetable when you don't fucking know them?
I'm a woman. My comment was asking if he left a mess behind him because that's the only way I could see a problem with it.
Well, if he masturbated while guests were actually in the house that'd be an issue.
But, no, OP just doesn't like that he does it it the toilet.
She lied by omission. Yes, it was in the past but the boundaries you both set were broken without your knowledge. You’ve cut off all of your past sexual relationships but she disguised one of hers as being her best friend. In other words, “you can’t expect me to get rid of my best friend right? I could never do that.”
Relationships shouldn’t be complicated and this is beyond a complicated situation. 4 months in is not a huge investment. You know the truth now and have a free “get out of the relationship “ card. Use it and move on.
Try something new, skiing could bored her if she do it often
It's possible that you're right, and she only came back to you when things didn't work out so well with Mr. Wonderful.
It's also possible that she built up an elaborate fantasy around this guy after he ghosted her, feeling that she'd let the love of her life slip away. So when it looked like she had a second chance with him, of course she went for it! But the difference was, she had started seeing you and she had someone to compare against him – and you came out the clear winner, once she saw Mr. Wonderful for who he really was.
I think you are smart to take it slow with her, especially since she appears to fall naked and quickly whenever a new man comes into her life. You're not dumb for feeling that she may not be the right romantic choice for you, although I'd question why you'd choose to think of yourself as “second best” in this scenario. The whole point of dating is to determine if someone who attracts you is sufficiently compatible. Please don't self-sabotage and assume she's only asking for a second chance now because the other guy didn't work out. She could have simply never contacted you again, and looked for someone else.
If you really liked her before she dumped you for someone else and then ricocheted back into your universe, feel free to give her a second chance to show whether she really likes you for yourself, rather than as a place-holder until something better comes along. Just be sure to take things slow, and get to know her well as a person before you fully give your heart to her. If OTOH you have determined that you don't want to see her again, please take the high road and tell her that. Don't be a low-class jerk and ghost her, like that other guy did.
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I feel equally are to blame, I do feel sorry for the BF who live! with them and I know exactly what it's like to online with a hoarder
When i mean man up I don't actually mean to man up as a gender statement
Just that he seems to taken the long approach in breaking up with her but again I don't blame him having second thoughts about being with OP as on paper they are not compatible
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He’d be better off then.
She likes the attention and doesn’t want to lose it to another girl. That doesn’t mean she wants you just that she likes dangling you on a string
What cowards way out here? He said thanks for your time and moved on. They met once.
If a relationship exists despite either party being largely uncomfortable with the other’s common tendencies, it should be assessed. That’s all I mean to say.
Regardless of who is being abusive or shady here bc you obvs shouldn't be looking through her search history, seems like you're in a toxic relationship and should get out
I can tell you from experience, it is 100% ok to grow and leave men that don’t behind. And you literally have to:
For me it happened twice- both really long relationships. I kept growing, they did not. I’ll tell you that if you stay, and try. You will subconsciously start to destroy the relationship and will get out of it. You will grow to resent these people, and do anything to get away from them, because you want to grow.
It’s easier to accept and move on, then fight and end it way worse later on
It is not in his best interest to be friends with you and it is not in your best interest to be friends with him. You need to figure out how to let this go.
Do what you must to get rid of the problem an switch to 3 month depo shot.
Yeah that’s a big one huh
'should we attend couples counselling as we have some bad traits in our relationship that we need to work on?'
'sounds like you have some unhealthy patterns happening in your relationship'
that is the exact reason why i was asking….
Leave him and have the baby on your own. It’s better to have one mom who loves you 100% than be a child growing up where you can tell one of your parents did not want you.
Why is your mother like this?
I think I’m also stuck because he claims he was giving me space when he doesn’t talk to me after a conflict, and I know he can avoid issues. I’m also stuck because he doesn’t do anything purposely mean, I think he’s just clueless which sucks because I do tell him exactly what I need and it hurts that he hasn’t done what I need until now.
No. You should live! your life to the fullest.
My thoughts. He’s laughing it off, no clue how shady that seems. That seems like something that could and should have easily be brought up.
There's a lot there, I didn't read everything but there's a few observations….. first, you apologize way too much, then you expected him to apologize a bunch of times too. That's not realistic. If there's a misunderstanding, you apologize one time, talk about how to avoid the misunderstanding next time, then move on. Continuing to say things like (paraphrasing) “Fine I guess I won't do that anymore! I'm sorry!” aren't value-add statements. At one point you guys sent heart emojis and said goodnight, everything seemed fine, then apparently 12 hours later you were fighting again, did you edit something out? Again, it seemed like you were rehashing things that didn't need to be rehashed. I can understand why you didn't want to talk to him while he was playing video games. I can also understand why he thought multitasking was going to solve his problems (even though ultimately he'd just be doing 2 things half assed). You guys are long distance, when communicating, you have to really trust eachother. If you say “play video games and we'll talk later, have fun” he has to trust you mean it. But also you have to actually mean it. You could probably do better saying what you actually mean, guys are terrible mind readers (all people really), keep it short and sweet, and honest!
Did you skipped the part where she said that she is struggling with the bills?
Ask him how often will they visit, because I’m afraid you will have them there far too often for your liking if they live! close by.
You need all this information before marrying this man and his family.
I think it’s telling that you simply brought up this topic and he immediately brought up grooming. He’s projecting because he knows he groomed you.
You were drunk/impaired, emotionally vulnerable, and alone that night. He took advantage of that. People can’t properly consent when under the influence of alcohol, which classifies what he did to you as r*pe under UK law.
His behavior is disrespectful to you yes. But disgusting? Wtf why? People can masturbate why is this so taboo? People use porn… A lot, so again, why is this taboo?
If you don't like this in your partner then this is something you need to speak to him but watching porn and masturbating is perfectly normal and the vast majority of people do it.
That's the whole point. You missed it there is no useful categorization.
Be comfortable saying “No”. No is an answer and a reason. If he gets hurt by it, it's on him, not you.
You definitely don’t “come out as poly.” It’s just a relationship preference. She’s just wording it in a way where you feel you have to comply as if it’s apart of LGBTQIA (which it is not) or else you’re not an “ally.” She’s trying to trap you into it.
The only question that matters now is, do you want a polyamorous relationship? If you’re hesitating at all then it isn’t for you.
We all like and dislike different things. Many of us are here because we like your work. But your art may not be for everyone.. I guess my point is that you should focus on his qualities, not his abilities. Maybe he is kind, and generous and naked working.. maybe he works nude and is very supportive of you and your goals. But if he doesn't like your work, it doesn't make him a bad boyfriend. And the same applies to you and his music. Maybe his skills will evolve. Maybe his taste in music will evolve. And maybe you will get a set of Bose noise cancelling headphones for your bday.. 'cause you want silence while you paint..???
Good luck.
Because she lives with mother-in-law. Actually she doesn't want to be in relationship any man. Even her husband. She hates him and men like broken women does
Yes. Yes I would like take responsibility of stepfather. I have very good relationship with her child. And she always says that her child looks like me
I’m American and my wife is German. She asked me to correct her grammar and pronunciation always. No matter the situation. Led to some awkward social moments and some complete gems.
One day she was really mad at me and told me, “You are so and asshole”
I replied, “Such. I am such an asshole.”
She then closes with, “Exactly.”
We live! in Germany now and you’d be nude pressed to tell she’s not American when she speaks English. But her German colleagues say she speaks German now with an American accent.
…so you want her to not talk to half the population because you are insecure?
There's literally no reason for her to delete anyone.
There are a lot of 26 year old women out there who get naked for boudoir shoots, gasp, in front of male photographers! There is no issue to be had with the wife… She was getting shots done by someone who is supposed to be acting as a professional. This is not some form of infidelity on wife’s part. bffr
dump him
It kinda depends on how well you know eachother. Hanging out seems to be a mutual wish if you both like eachother. From my personal experience I'd advice you to take it easy. So no candle light diners or declarations of love in public, just a walk and coffee, maybe go to some place that's about a mutual hobby? If she really likes you too, you'll be dating soon enough 🙂
Tried this the last two weeks. She came back but simply because she missed me and wanted to know how I'm doing. She wasn't a nuance clearer about us and our future plans. This was too naked so I broke off contact yesterday. She says she currently can't fight for us because she's too confused. I'm only wondering if I made a mistake in case she will decide for us. It's just I can't stand it anymore.
Yeah.. If I was this male victim of Bob's I would look forward to seeing Bob, for some post reception shenanigans, and I dont mean the fun kind. Because honestly, that Bob has a whoopin coming. Just wait til the bride and groom take off, and then whoop Bobs sorry ass lmao. Thats justice.
If OP's story is real I have a feeling she has some plans for an “oops, I'm pregnant” moment.
I would recommend that you bring it up with a bit of corcern for his health.
“Like, honey we need to talk. I think you need to go to the doctor. Maybe you remember that I brought up you smelled a bit a while ago, and honestly it never went away and I'm nervous there's something wrong.”
I would recommend that you bring it up with a bit of corcern for his health.
“Like, honey we need to talk. I think you need to go to the doctor. Maybe you remember that I brought up you smelled a bit a while ago, and honestly it never went away and I'm nervous there's something wrong.”
Some guys would, other won't. But I don't think that's what is happening now. I mean it's a casual relationship from the start so it's not like it was expected that feelings would be involved. The relationship was about sex from the start.
Why did he used to kiss you/stay the night and now he doesn't. Maybe simply because he figure out that he doesn't need to do it. He can have sex with you without doing those things and since feelings are not involved, he doesn't have a reason to do it.
Also the fact that he only call you once a month tell me that you are not the only girl in his life. Because unless he is extremely busy with his jobs or something else, he would probably want to have sex more than once a month. Maybe the reason he show less affection is because he is closer with another casual relationship.
I know it's painful for you to consider that thought. But I pointed it out because most people who say they are incapable of love are suffering from Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Those people are well known and well-documented for being unable to form healthy, lasting relationships and cheating is a big part of their relationship modus operandi.
It's a huge red flag. I understand why this person is on your mind so much but speaking from personal experience, it will pass. It will take about 2-3 months. In the meantime I strongly suggest you do things that make you feel good, things that produce feel good hormones. Exercise is excellent for that. Taking a 30 minute walk out in nature helps you not only physically but mentally. Listen to your favorite music. Get a massage. Or watch some comedies.
I wish you luck and healing.
Relationships are supposed to be fun. Have some
That’s my fear that we won’t be friends. We both are in the same friend group, and if that happens, the group might disperse.
That’s what he said
We don’t know whether it’s true
Tell us how your lives are tied together. Let us couch you through untangling things. Think of it this way— as low as he just set the bar, the next guy just needs to step on over.
Any specific books you would recommend?
I might do 1 & 2 and if all else fails imma divorce him thanks for the advice
If we're playing what-ifs to give this person an anxiety attack instead of sound advice to try and help guide them along, then what if he's changed as a person? What if he isn't attracted to juveniles anymore?
She pointed out how their conversations we're different, and that those conversations gave OP hope. That is somewhat indicative to me that he has grown as a person in some way.
Either way this comment is pretty weird. You've gone as far as to accuse the man of being unfaithful to OP, saying he will “cheat behind your back” when she said very little or nothing that would have given a reasonable person an excuse to think that way about him.
Obviously if OP can't move past this, if it's a deal-breaker for her, she should find a way to move on with her life without him. I just don't see how comments like this contribute to the conversation in a positive way. I feel like your comment had very little to do with OP's situation, you seem upset about something else entirely.
Confronting an abuser will still not be safe if she's mad.
I don’t condone his actions at all but when did 18 become a child? I was told that’s the age when you become an adult. Did that change?
Do you know for a fact that he hasn't cheated on you before at university
Did they come clean about their cheating because they were remorseful or because they were worried they'd get sprung
As for not planned. Rubbish. They arranged for her to go to his house to discuss 'feelings'. That was planned
Unplanned is when someone goes to a bar, gets drunk and hooks up with a stranger. This is the complete opposite
Have you asked to see his phone and the messages they have sent each other?
I think you're clinging onto to this relationship when you know this goes deeper and are refusing to see it
Rip the band aid off
Redditor calls something ,which isn't even remotely related to controlling, controlling.
More news at 11. Like seriously.
I don’t know if Polish people do this but Russian people have shortened names, and then shortened names that are more “sweet.” I dated a guy Dmitriy. I called him Dima, so did all his friends. His mom and family called him “Dimka” (deemka). It’s possible that she’s taking standard nicknames as the more “sweet” version. This is a cultural barrier but it can be worked through. My ex didn’t care if I called someone Mike if they were Michael, because he knew it wasn’t a sweet version or anything
You're allowed to have female friends. It's not cheating to have friends.
If you're buying them lunch because you're fucking them, then yes, that's cheating.