So my parents were both married before I was born. My father had an amicable divorce with his ex wife Janice. She was the mother of his 4 kids, and they split custody. Janice has been a part of MY life for as long as I can remember. She isn’t a major part, I see her maybe every few years, but when I do it’s a lovely experience. She is so kind, and my mother and her get along splendidly. When her husband passed suddenly, my parents helped her get her affairs in order, and even traveled to spend time with her during her time of grief. Not once did my mother question their friendship, or ever said one bad thing about Janice, and Janice did the same when it came to my mother.
This relationship helped me strengthen my bond with my half siblings, and I honestly had loads of respect for my dad for it, even though he is a VERY difficult person, this was one of his redeeming qualities.
The fact that your wife claims that it will negatively effect your children is selfish and just a poor excuse for her own insecurities.
Blended families thrive with positive relationships. It sounds like the one with your ex wife is bonded with mutual respect, and it’s honestly an amazing thing. It’s incredibly selfish of your wife to propose this, and if you concede it will damage how your kids see you. Because I know that if my dad was nasty to Janice or straight up ignored her, I would wonder if he could treat me as disposable as well, or my mother if she ever left him.
You need to have a serious discussion with your wife, and get to the root of her insecurities. You should also make it clear that it isn’t her decision to make. Coparenting doesn’t stop when your kids leave the nest. What about when your kids start having your grandchildren? What if your kids end up in the hospital? Or need financial help? You should still be able to xp parent, and grandparent. Because if you don’t, your kids will always see it as you choosing your wife over them.
Just wanted to say you’re worth more than this. There doesn’t need to be an argument, he doesn’t need to admit anything, he’s not communicating with you in good faith so it’s a waste of your time. Treat it like arguing about something so basic that everyone knows by kindergarten and save your effort for getting out of this marriage. He’s going to keep lying but you don’t have to keep putting up with it.
???? Where does the comment say you plan dates and encourage her to have a life outside of motherhood? Don’t tell me I’m going blind
Please listen to your instinct – its trying to tell you something
Ok this is insane.
So my parents were both married before I was born. My father had an amicable divorce with his ex wife Janice. She was the mother of his 4 kids, and they split custody. Janice has been a part of MY life for as long as I can remember. She isn’t a major part, I see her maybe every few years, but when I do it’s a lovely experience. She is so kind, and my mother and her get along splendidly. When her husband passed suddenly, my parents helped her get her affairs in order, and even traveled to spend time with her during her time of grief. Not once did my mother question their friendship, or ever said one bad thing about Janice, and Janice did the same when it came to my mother.
This relationship helped me strengthen my bond with my half siblings, and I honestly had loads of respect for my dad for it, even though he is a VERY difficult person, this was one of his redeeming qualities.
The fact that your wife claims that it will negatively effect your children is selfish and just a poor excuse for her own insecurities.
Blended families thrive with positive relationships. It sounds like the one with your ex wife is bonded with mutual respect, and it’s honestly an amazing thing. It’s incredibly selfish of your wife to propose this, and if you concede it will damage how your kids see you. Because I know that if my dad was nasty to Janice or straight up ignored her, I would wonder if he could treat me as disposable as well, or my mother if she ever left him.
You need to have a serious discussion with your wife, and get to the root of her insecurities. You should also make it clear that it isn’t her decision to make. Coparenting doesn’t stop when your kids leave the nest. What about when your kids start having your grandchildren? What if your kids end up in the hospital? Or need financial help? You should still be able to xp parent, and grandparent. Because if you don’t, your kids will always see it as you choosing your wife over them.
Just wanted to say you’re worth more than this. There doesn’t need to be an argument, he doesn’t need to admit anything, he’s not communicating with you in good faith so it’s a waste of your time. Treat it like arguing about something so basic that everyone knows by kindergarten and save your effort for getting out of this marriage. He’s going to keep lying but you don’t have to keep putting up with it.