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Mellors, y.o.
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Date: October 31, 2022
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There is a right way to introduce sleeping with other people into your relationship, but this seems very one sided.
I like putting it like that. His girlfriend does photography so I'm sure she's going to ask to do photos for the buisness. But I already told my youngest brother he could do the photos (Hes not coding techy but likes using his cannon camera and wants to help out). But maybe I could just tell my other brother that if he asks.. I don't want to not like her, but my parents were always fighting and arguing and I grew up around that and I'm just done with it. And my Dad was a major domestic abuser so that kind of environment causes me bad anxiety. Now that I'm grown I want to chose to be away from that. Plus she would use me to try to get back at my brother, and Idk I just felt used
Send him to a doctor
This is it exactly ^
Not to mention OP failed to mention that his FIL never met the step-granddaughter. So he's willing to take money from a perfect stranger for his daughter.
This is all sus.
…. People who call feminism bullshit are the problem. Thanks for showing your true colors.
Feminism is about equality.
And yet you don't think working women should do 50% of domestic labor, while the men do the other 50%. If you live in a home with another person, the labor should be divided evenly UNLESS there are different time constraints.
Both of these people are gainfully employed. There is absolutely no reason a woman should be doing more household labor than her male partner.
Just say you're an anti-feminist next time, because you obviously don't believe in equality.
That is the hypocrisy of people who announce their “Christianity”. Would Jesus approve? No.
I agree, it is quick. We were not discussing marriage yet but were talking about moving in together after the new year.
The question you should be asking is how could you possibly look at this situation and still want to be with this guy?
You've stated that the closest person to your bf is in pain and in the hospital and doesn't care.. what exactly do you expect to happen if you ever get sick?
I laughed so hot
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Yeah, that's weird. Usually I'm the one on these threads who tells people they are overreacting, but that's sketchy. You need to ask what's going on. It's like he's protecting her feelings. She needs to stop and be an adult.
Take a picture of the glasses to tuck away. Wait until tomorrow before saying anything just in case. Then mention the charge on the account and ask if he knows about it or if you need to call the bank for a fraudulent charge
A selfish, life ruining and destructive choice. Just because your sexuality isn't a choice let's not pretend she's a good person, her decisions at every point has lead her down this path. She could have stopped at any time.
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If she was accusing you – then she was probably projecting her own guilt. It honestly depends on what you are prepared to let slide – early into a relationship, it is easy to be more forgiving than you would be later on – but if you had already agreed to be exclusive and she was still on Tinder, then I would personally find it impossible to trust her again after that.
seems like a fetish post.
Right this is an everyday occurrence
No.
Fucking hell. One of my friends broke up with a guy, he started flipping shit over too, threw the TV through the window… she lived on the first floor in the city, so it hit a passing cop. Dude found out about karma that evening!
Thoughts..?
So he remarried within a year or so and is surprised when he didn't do his due diligence? Or that things have changed since that whirlwind?
I'm surprised that OP had time for dating and in-depth conversations about what they want together while working, getting divorced, and raising three kids.
He doesn't get to “allow” anything.
You constantly give him the benefit of the doubt.
Thanks for the advice!
No I'm not saying that because I'm “much too kind”, I'm saying it because I admire people who stand up for what is right.
My partner had to leave his home country, his brother died in prison (probably of torture, since he was 21 and bursting with health), his sister was imprisoned in an effort to flush my partner out of hiding. He too was very ashamed of all that and hated that his family suffered because of what he did. But his family still all love him to bits.
He was also angry with me for telling the kids that he couldn't go home because of his refugee status. I hadn't set out to do so, but our son asked why we went to see my parents but not Daddy's. But I explained that I told the story in an appropriate way for the kids, no gore, and made their father the hero of the story – and as I see it, he is a hero for trying.
There were terrible consequences to your actions, but if nobody ever tried to make the world a better place, imagine how grim it would be! Someone has to try and those who do try, are heroes whether they are successful or not. Sometimes success is built on previous failures, sometimes success takes almost a lifetime to achieve (look at Mandela for example!)
There is no “not letting me break up with him”
He has no say in this. This is your choice and your choice only. He’s Job is to accept it
No
True, there’s an awful lot of religious hypocrisy. But if she’s going to use Catholicism to push for implanting embryos with IVF when the Catholic Church declares IVF a sin then she’s just being manipulative.
No need for conversations and her trying to wiggle her way out. The trust is destroyed. I’d be out.
I agree with ya bf it can defo be traumatic in the case of rape but that life did nothing to be created it's innocent for you personally I'd just say Keep on top of your birth control it's that simple don't allow yourself to be in a situation of accidental pregnancy if your not ready or oh the horror try celibacy?? Just a thought but if that's too outdated practice safe sex and have a plan for pregnancy cus reality it's 2 against 1 YOU being the one if it's his he is Gunna want it to live the fetos/ baby wants to live that's why it keeps GROWING
One thing is clear that he would not stop watching porn and if porn is a big problem for you where you feel pain then he is not a guy for you. You tried to talk to him but he turned hostel means he does not want to discuss this issue with you nor he has intention to stop watching it to make you feel secure and happy in relationship. You put your foot down and warn him that either he has to choose you or porn as porn is not your thing and you do not want porn in relationship.
You sound extremely passive aggressive toward your spouse.
Is this how you link? I'm on mobile
Oh hell no I’d divorce
Break up, he’s sneaky and doesn’t trust you, he has no boundaries. Why stick around?
when he's annoyed during our dates
If I were you, I'd stop going on dates with someone who is so frequently pissed off at you.
Hey she was the one flirting with me not me flirting with her. ??♂️
Maybe but then he’d probably say it’s nothing
Few issues here. So it does seem like she doesn’t particularly care for you. Why do you need her approval so badly? If your boyfriend doesn’t stand up for you if you’re being blatantly disrespected, that’s an issue although (unless I missed something) it doesn’t seem like that’s been the case… As for the trip, I think you are expecting too much when you’re not married which would make you family. A few weeks is not the end of the world.
I suck for protecting my family?
Are you married to my ex husband? He did the SAME SHIT. Expect he didn’t bother to tell me that’s why he wouldn’t fuck me.
Then again, I also had two young children, a part time job and was in school. If your only job is keeping g the house clean…why aren’t you doing g the dishes every single day?
She doesn't understand corporate life, and the worst part is she is unwilling to learn. You need to start putting your foot down and thinking of your money as yours again, because she clearly thinks it's hers. You're going to keep getting passed by other younger more dynamic men and women at your office if you're seen as the sap who has to do as his wife tells him.
If changing her body to make you happy would take so much effort that she wouldn’t enjoy life—that can happen—then are you worth it? Can she really permanently, safely change her body without being miserable? You underestimate how hot it can be for someone to change their body.
She already told you she wanted more communication from you and you responded by ghosting her for 7 days. How on earth did you think that was the best response if you were interested in seeing her again?
She already told you she wanted more communication from you and you responded by ghosting her for 7 days. How on earth did you think that was the best response if you were interested in seeing her again?
I won the best prize! Not her! Thank god, dodging bullets out here
Of course you only agreed because he brought it up, it wasn’t on your radar.
Honestly, he’s pissed because -1 he’s got someone in mind and if you agree it isn’t cheating Or -2 he already cheated and is looking for a way to make it ok
Don’t do something you have to be convinced of doing. You will be miserable and resent him. However, at this point seems he’s made his choice. Not sure I’d put up with it. He wants an open relationship, he can have one without you.
Sorry you have to deal with this situation.
Psycho.
Im just wondering how many times your son has been “ going out to eat with a male friend” when he’s actually been going out with other girls?
I know op you’ll say never or not my son but he is your son and you’ll believe him over everything. Then when he’s caught red handed it will be “she was to controlling he wasn’t allowed to have friends”.
I’m thinking son has been lying lots even little white lies have a tendency to catch up with people
You enjoyed your mom being there, she enjoys her mom being there. Funny how that happens… how much did you enjoy your mother in law being there?
Well said. Although she’s already causing herself damage by gaining weight. I’m a firm believer that for example food addiction should be treated as any other addiction, as in no one should deceive and enable their loved ones when it comes to any self-destructive behaviours. Even though I understand the nuances, I personally don’t like how obesity is treated as something ’unapproachable’ in the modern world. Nobody wins.
It sounds like your main concerns boil down to just wanting the freedom to kind of come and go and do as you please. Being that you're young, I can see the appeal of that.
Still. Do you love her? Do you see a future with her? You absolutely shouldn't move in with someone if you're not 100% sure about it, especially if there are incompatibilities at play (which it seems there are). However, both partners in a relationship should be on the same page about ultimate goals. She's ready for the next level of commitment, you're not. It's worth it to have a very real conversation about how you both feel about each other, and where you see the relationship heading. You don't want her to feel like you're wasting her time and that you'll never be ready.
Why bother replying? Retard
When you post on a public forum, you don’t get to choose who responds.
The really tough part about distance relationships is the fact that you never really know what's going on with the other person. You think that you know but you don't know even if you think you know.
It's extremely easy to date other people or even be in a relationship with someone else. Dating apps aren't the only way to meet girls. And going to entire weeks without talking to somebody is extreme.
And like you said you're not stupid. The most likely answer is he's talking to some other girl. And he hopes that going no contact with you will make you be the one to anything. Or keep you emotionally stringed along for some narcissistic reason.
If I put ANYTHING on the curb and then came across it at someone else's home, I would be glad that they got use out of it.
Hey, I'm going through a bit of this right now. Two months ago, my girlfriend of two years blindsided me. I know it's the worst and most unfathomable feeling.
The best thing you can do is spend time with friends and family. Hell, take a trip with them if you can. My girlfriend happened to break up with me a few days before I went to meet friends in Cancun, and it didn't cure my pain but it certainly helped.
Other than that, delete or otherwise compile and ignore pictures/texts/cards. When I'm feeling something, I write a letter to her in my notes.
Even as someone who is still largely in the “I'm gonna try to fix things” phase of grief, I can tell you that it does get easier. It doesn't seem like it, my words probably seem like BS. You need to find things in your life to fill the void he left behind, and other ways to reach those dopamine highs. Take on new hobbies, go to the gym, work on yourself. All of this may be cliche but I hope it helps.
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Sometimes I get things in my head and they make complete sense to me, but maybe they’re a little crazy.
There’s a place in Asia I’ve always wanted to go to and I planned to go with my ex best friend, that friendship ended and a year or 2 later I met my bf. He always wanted to go there too but hadn’t been.
This year he started planning to go with his friends, he did invite me but I had always told him that I didn’t want to go there with them. I would just do what they wanted to do, and it would ruin the experience.
The thing is, now I don’t want to go with my bf later either. I’d want to go with someone who has never been or even just by myself! I don’t want to see all these places, and eat all the food etc with someone who’s already done it.
I don’t feel this way about all the countries and cities I want to see, only this place, but am I just being silly?
You’re literally disgusting. You allowed this man to propose and said yea knowing what you did.
Leave him alone. He deserves better than you. And if you had ANY morals you would give back the ring you didn’t deserve in the first place
So he's a a hobosexual. You need to leave yesterday. He's not gonna do a damn thing with you doing everything
I honestly don't think it is something appropriate to address with her at all. She has been opened and is clearly interested in trying something more serious with you. This is a YOU problem. She cannot change her past. This calls for some inner reflection. Ask yourself if you can handle working through insecurities you have about her past and if you feel like that work is worth it to be with her.
Do not do this. I would pay for “friends” meals in college because I could. The second I needed a hand they were offended I even asked.