My boyfriend (20m) of 3 years had an extremely rare and late glow up. When we first started dating when we were 17 years old he was average height, had no sense of fashion, and looked like he was still going through puberty.
Shockingly, he had one of those extremly rare late growth spurts, and he's now around 6' 4". Along with the growth spurt he started working out, learned how to dress (because of me) and his facial structure has somehow become more sharpe. Almost as if he had buccal fat removal or something, but I know he didn't.
All of this has given him a massive ego boost, and he's now out of control. Somehow, he has become more misogynistic now that he's above average looking, then when he was below average looking. He's very rude to female waitresses when we go out to eat, and when I call him out on it, he'll say something like "that btch would have treated me like sht a few years ago".
It's now embarrassing to go out with him because of his behavior, and when we hang out with my friend group he likes to obsess over the fact that my male friends used to make fun of his looks in the past, and he now makes fun of their looks and calls them "short apes" and other insults, which I think is kinda racist?
Anyway, what do I do? Is this a phase or something? I'm so confused as to why his behavior became worse now that he had a glow up.
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ohh, i see. you intentionally skipped over the “there are two other bathrooms in the home (that aren't near/only accessible through the bedroom)” to reach this conclusion.
i had live! therapy sessions in the bedroom of a flat that consists of just three rooms – lounge/kitchen, bathroom, and bedroom – and was never interrupted by my partner. she is absolutely right to ask him to not violate her or the therapists privacy while she has such an intimate appointment.
It sounds like she’s coming out of her shell and you’re reaping the benefits. Just enjoy it!
Can you take the kids and go visit family/friends for a week or month? Let your husband sit in his own shit.
You and your children deserve a clean and safe home. I agree with my fellow redditors: you have a husband problem. The dogs are just a symptom.
Go to a family/divorce lawyer anyways. Tell them your situation and find out your options. Then you can make a well-informed desicion on how to proceed to get what's best for your kids.
Your ex girlfriend and her friend just need to make it official and get it over with.
Thank you so much for this thoughtful response. It helped bring me back down to earth, so to speak, and remind me that adults of the opposite sex can be friends without anything malicious occuring.
That said, while I don't think an affair is on the docket, I'm struggling with what to do with my feelings about what I am perceiving as a mutual attraction. Obviously, this falls squarely in the 'things I can't control' category, but I'm still wrestling with trying to be a good and trusting spouse and feeling like all they'll do is go 'get their flirt on'.
Not for you to solve, for sure, just voicing my concerns. Again, really appreciate the thoughtfulness of your response.